While Others Became Female Leads In Romantic Fantasy Novels, I Became A Closet Monster
Chapter 40
It couldn’t have been that long since I’d spaced out, yet he’d cried so much his eyes were already raw and puffy….
I thought I was the only one who felt desperate for Dedrick….
‘It feels like I’ve finally received confirmation that I wasn’t the only one.’
The realization made me so happy that, despite the situation, the corners of my mouth twitched upward.
Dedrick pressed a finger against my lips.
“……Why are you laughing?”
“No, it’s just, I don’t think I’m the only one who likes Didi!”
His mouth hung open for a moment, and then his face suddenly crumpled with emotion.
“What are you talking about? I lo—love you so much…. You’re not the only one who likes the other…….”
Watching him look so inexplicably wronged, I finally couldn’t hold back the ticklish feeling inside and burst out laughing.
Seeing me like that, Dedrick smiled back at me.
“You’re pretty when you laugh.”
He repeated the words I had once said to him.
Only then did we sit down. After calmly organizing what had just happened in my head, I began to speak.
“I was abandoned in a forest where a war was breaking out. I’m not entirely sure, but as a newborn, it seems I was able to absorb things around me with my horns. I think I was abandoned there because I absorbed blood.”
“There’s nothing but blood on a battlefield…… it’s not like you did anything wrong.”
“It’s okay. Being abandoned doesn’t really bother me.”
I gave Dedrick, who was more upset than I was, a tight squeeze before continuing my story.
“And then, I almost died, but someone saved me.”
“Who?”
“I can’t remember! Their face is blurry. A woman struggled to save me. The man next to her didn’t seem to like the idea, but it looked like he saved me reluctantly because she kept begging him.”
And judging by what the woman said, that man seemed to be ‘God’s Representative.’
In fact, even without the woman’s words, I could feel that the man was no ordinary being.
I knew instinctively that the energy flowing from him was exceptionally holy.
The textures and feelings in the memory were all vivid.
Above all, the last thing the woman said to me….
I could vaguely tell that those weren’t words spoken at the time she rescued me.
Which meant that even after being saved, I had continued to stay with that woman.
Though I have no memory of it.
‘Then how did I end up drifting here?’
And why is Dedrick the only one who can see me? Why does the Grand Duke pretend not to know I’m here even though he clearly does?
Why won’t he tell me anything……?
‘More than anything, it bothers me that only the Grand Duke and Didi can see me.’
Could it be…… that the Grand Duke is God’s Representative?
Then, bringing me here was perhaps…….
A sudden thought struck me, and I looked at Dedrick.
‘Didi’s mother? !’
Gasps! I hurriedly closed my lips, which had fallen open in shock.
I wanted to ask about Dedrick’s mother right away, but I had to be careful.
Lest I touch upon Didi’s trauma.
I hesitated before finally, slowly, parting my lips.
“……Didi, do you happen to know how the Grand Duke and your mother met?”
Dedrick flinched slightly and then nodded.
“I know, but not in detail……. I’m sorry.”
“Ah, I’m not trying to blame you or anything……. Just, sorry.”
I’m the one who’s sorry.
I comforted the now-gloomy Dedrick. I decided to keep my mouth shut regarding this matter for now.
It would be better to ask when things were more certain.
And Dedrick said he didn’t know much anyway.
That said, even if I tried to meet the Grand Duke, it wasn’t like he’d tell me anything.
Most of all, I couldn’t even see him!
He had vanished to who-knows-where again, and there had been no word from him.
‘What should I do…….’
As I sank into worry, Dedrick changed the subject as if to lighten the heavy atmosphere.
“But will your memories keep coming back suddenly like that in the future?”
I intentionally answered with a brighter tone. I felt bad for bringing up his mother so abruptly.
“Ah! I don’t think it was sudden. Actually, as soon as I heard the word ‘World Tree,’ I felt something strange. Maybe the World Tree is the medium for finding my memories.”
According to that woman, only God’s Representative can enter the Sanctuary….
“Didi, the World Tree is in the Sanctuary, right? Where is the Sanctuary?”
“The end of the world, or the starting point of the world, or perhaps the center of the world.”
When I asked back blankly, Dedrick looked at me, chuckled softly, and scratched his cheek.
“The World Tree is in the Sanctuary, but no one knows where that Sanctuary is. No one knows where the end, the start, or the center of the world is either…….”
It truly was a space that only God’s Representative could enter.
Since the Sanctuary was never mentioned in the novel, I had absolutely no information about it.
“Then what about God’s Representative? Since they’re a representative, would they be in the human world? Like at the Temple.”
“God’s Representative and the priests of the Temple have different meanings. I heard that God conveys His words to the Representative, and the Representative filters them so humans can understand before passing them to the Temple.”
“Then can the people at the Temple see God’s Representative?”
“I don’t know much because there isn’t much known about the Temple, but they probably can’t. I think I heard somewhere that the Representative only lets their voice be heard through oracles.”
“……Is the Temple shrouded in mystery?”
“The Temple is independent. It’s mostly located on Bjorn, the island given by God. Ordinary people like us can never enter.”
This was unexpected information. After organizing my confused thoughts for a moment, I asked again.
“Then how do you meet the priests?”
“There’s no reason to meet them in the first place…… and if you absolutely had to, you’d have to wait. Until they come off the island.”
“And when is that?”
“Usually when they come to find someone to judge for a great sin, or when a demon appears, or when a disaster strikes the country. Periodically, they come out once during the Founding Festival or on God’s Birthday.”
“So God’s Representative can’t be human?”
“No. They are called God’s Representative, but I read that they also possess power rivaling that of a god.”
Why would such a God’s Representative come to the human world and be with a human woman……?
Since the woman said she couldn’t go to the Sanctuary, she must be human. If not human, she might be of another race like me.
Come to think of it, I don’t even know what race I am….
Is there a separate race called Closet Monsters?
That’s a bit funny.
When I let out a snicker, Dedrick looked a bit uneasy.
“Why……? Did I explain something wrong?”
“Huh? No, I just thought of something funny. I was wondering if there’s actually a race called Closet Monsters.”
“Then it makes sense why I don’t have a name! I was abandoned before I could even be named!”
I spoke with a bright smile, but Dedrick didn’t laugh.
It seemed self-deprecating humor wasn’t Dedrick’s cup of tea.
I quickly opened my mouth to change the atmosphere.
“I think I need to look into the World Tree in more detail. Didi, do you know anything else?”
“I only needed to know the symbolism, so I didn’t usually study the World Tree……. And information on it is remarkably scarce.”
“Then, even if it’s just a little bit of information, could you help me look for things about the World Tree?”
I thought he would agree instantly, but Dedrick hesitated.
“Do you not want to?”
Had I been too annoying these past few days….
“If you don’t want to…….”
“If we find it, do you have to leave?”
Dedrick’s eyes wavered with anxiety.
He was worried I might leave.
I shook my head with a smile.
“Finding my memories doesn’t undo the fact that I was abandoned. Even if it did, I like being by Didi’s side the most, so I have no intention of going anywhere.”
I meant it.
It was a stroke of luck that I was even alive. If I hadn’t met those two, I would have died right then and there.
In such a situation, why would I want to find the family that left me to die?
“Really?”
“Really! But I can’t keep living without my memories. I want to know exactly who I am.”
“I’ll help you find it.”
“Didi is the best!”
I jumped for joy.
For several days, we hoistered ourselves up in the library to find information about the World Tree.
But the library was so massive that finding a single book related to the World Tree was difficult.
I wanted to ask the librarian, but it was obvious that word would reach Delaney’s ears.
She would be suspicious of Dedrick looking for the World Tree, which had nothing to do with his studies.
Of course, she wouldn’t figure out my existence right away, but it didn’t hurt to be careful.
‘Ugh. Honestly, from the librarians to the passing servants, there isn’t a single trustworthy person here!’
“I’m going to set the Grand Duke’s Castle on fire. Except for Didi.”
Despite my bloodthirsty words, Dedrick blushed and looked happy.
It seemed Dedrick had a thing for monsters with terrible personalities.
Like me, for instance.
