Previously
Jeanne arrives at the office prepared for the worst, only to be met with Baldur's fury over her reckless behavior in the cold. He berates her for risking frostbite and death by walking outside during a ground blizzard.
Then he began getting angry all over again.
Never. Seeing my utter bewilderment, he swept back the strands of hair falling over his brow.
Losing fingers just from taking a walk outside?
Instinctively, I cupped both hands over my nose.
And then the realization struck me.
‘So that was why he told me to bathe!’
The moment I finally understood why he had given that command, I felt like dying of mortification.
After unleashing that rapid barrage of reproaches, he demanded,
“…”
I tried to smooth over the moment with silence, but there was no escaping his sharp gaze. In the end, I had no choice but to confess the truth.
He tilted his head, looking as though he had not grasped a single syllable. If a puppy tilted its head like that, it would have been adorable, but coming from the Duke, it was not charming in the least.
At my fumbling explanation, the Duke planted both hands on his hips, his mouth falling open. He looked me up and down.
he muttered, almost to himself.
His tone and expression clearly said he had never seen such a fool in his entire life. Lowering his head, he let out a deep, incredulous sigh. I wished the ground would swallow me whole. To think I had imagined this man, who looked at me as if I were the world’s greatest idiot, was entertaining thoughts of taking me into his arms.
“Surely that is hardly worth staking your nose or your fingers on, is it?”
What in the world had I been thinking? On our very first meal together, I had vomited right in front of him, and not long after that, I had been caught scooping fallen apples into the folds of my skirt.
‘Thank heavens… thank heavens I never gave voice to my foolish delusion.’
It was an immense relief that the Duke had no idea what thoughts had run through my head when I entered his office.
His voice betrayed the unspoken grievance: ‘Just how much more consideration am I expected to show you?’ Overcome by embarrassment, I could not muster a single word. I shook my head in silence, my heart pounding violently against my ribs as if it might burst from sheer shame.
Looking back, I truly was an incomparable fool. Before long, I would break the Duke’s prohibition and do everything he had warned against. Had I known what the future held, what would I have done? Even if it meant having all my clothes tailored anew, I would have gladly put on weight. No, I never would have breached his decree.
Following that day, I took His Grace’s warning and counsel to heart, never taking a single step beyond the mansion’s doors. I had no desire to trade my nose or my fingers for a slimmer waistline. And what of the weight? I trimmed down my meals slightly and spent more time riding Brül. Fortunately, weight quickly gained was quickly lost, and within two weeks, the dresses that had felt ready to split with a single breath fit comfortably once more.
‘Whew.’
How, then, did I end up venturing out again? It was because roughly a month after that incident, the blizzards finally halted, giving way to a day that remained freezing, yet remarkably crisp and bright.
As the sun beat down for the first time in what felt like ages and the lash-like winds died away, the servants pulled back the thick, heavy tapestries covering the corridor windows all at once, throwing the casements open to air out the mansion. The incoming draft was chilly, but it swept away the stagnant, heavy air like a broom, ushering in brilliant sunlight and fresh air to fill the void.
‘It’s cold, but lovely.’
I inhaled the fresh air deep into my lungs. Shivering slightly, I looked outside to see dozens of servants diligently clearing the thick blankets of white snow with shovels. Throughout the lesson, Ana was entirely unable to concentrate, stepping toward the window to peer out at every opportunity.
I had known there was a large lake near the forest’s edge, but I had never learned its name was Argent. When I rode Brül to the lakeshore in autumn, I had turned back after spotting the stags drinking water on high alert. With frames larger than Brül and crowned with massive antlers, a single strike from them would have left me with little chance of survival.
When I shook my head, Ana clung to me, looking up with wide, puppy-dog eyes.
“Mmm…”
‘Is that so? If there is no snow falling and the wind doesn’t blow, is it safe to linger outside?’
I knew very little of this region, but I thought if Ana, a native of the North, deemed it fine, it was likely so.
‘Busy? Her only duty should be keeping Ana company.’
Ana’s words stirred my worry. The lakeshore seemed to overlap with the deer habitat, and venturing there alone might lead her to cross paths with wild beasts, such as boars or wolves.
“Mmm.”
A frown settled onto my brow.
“Mmm…”
Seeing her so thrilled made me hesitate to refuse. I had felt stifled and restless myself. Given what Ana said, the nanny clearly would not accompany her, and I was in no position of authority to order the nanny to attend us.
‘I’d be far too worried letting her go on her own.’
Before long, I would come to regret this choice with every fiber of my being—that as an adult, I had allowed a young child to guide me into an unknown world. Blind to what lay ahead, I set out on the road alongside Ana.
Ana’s mount was a dark chestnut pony, and she rode with such natural grace that she seemed almost one with the animal.
‘Wow…!’
Cantering atop Brül, I realized how cooped up I had truly felt. The wind bit with a stinging chill, but beneath the warm sunlight, it was far more bearable than I had feared, and the rush felt exhilarating. It was as though I were running with my own legs.
I opened my mouth, breathing in the invigorating air. My hair fluttered loose from beneath my black velvet cap. Having spent weeks inside the indoor arena, Brül seemed equally delighted to finally be outdoors. She did not look the least bit cold, her thick, long winter coat shielding her from the harsh weather.
Traveling on foot would have taken an age, but on horseback, the journey flew by. Soon we arrived at the shore of the lake. It was frozen solid, resembling an immense silver platter, its surface catching the sunlight and casting back a blinding brilliance. Just like along the road, tree branches snapped under the heavy burden of snow lay strewn about the water’s edge.
Sitting tall atop Brül, I lost myself for a moment, captivated by the sight of an entirely new world.