135 - Pieces of the Broken Glass Slipper
Shattered Glass Slipper Shards 135
==========
“You knew I was hearing about that, didn’t you?”
At my response, she wore an apologetic expression and let out a small sigh. Her drooping shoulders contained her distress.
“Jealous people wouldn’t stay still. But don’t misunderstand. I just didn’t think it was desirable to talk about that child.”
Lady Roshan spoke to me as if trying to explain. Her face was filled with sadness as she added, ‘What good would it do to bring up the dead child’s affairs?’
“She was a good child. That’s why Mel cherished that poor girl so much.”
I intuitively realized that what she was saying now was related to Sir Ayres. That it would be a valid reason for the ridiculous story of falling in love at first sight.
“Rosenin resembled Sis a lot. Not in appearance, but in her eyes and actions.”
Lady Roshan jokingly said, ‘Sis is more beautiful in appearance,’ but I couldn’t bring myself to laugh and say it was funny. It was because of her gaze, which stared at me with a look full of longing.
“I still remember vividly. Rosenin, dressed in a dusty coat, asking if this was the Roshan estate. It was very impressive. From the worn-out hair tie to the protruding hair, it was very frizzy like animal fur.”
A cute girl who came from a small rural village in search of distant relatives. Although she was nominally the daughter of a baronet, Rosenin lived in a small hut without any decent farmland or mansion, making her no different from a commoner.
The fact that she didn’t have proper table manners, gait, or even basic knowledge despite being fifteen years old proved it.
But Lady Roshan loved such Rosenin and treated her as a guest of the family for two months, as stated in the letter she brought.
This country bumpkin was about to faint when she wore a silk dress for the first time in her life, and her eyes welled up with tears every time she ate the food carefully prepared by the chef.
‘Will such a day ever come again in my life?’
Perhaps it could have if she hadn’t gotten involved with Michael Ayres.
Sir Ayres met Rosenin about halfway through the promised period. It happened because he visited the Roshan estate first.
“Mel and I have the same taste in people we like. So he was able to like Rosenin quickly too.”
Of course, it wasn’t a romantic feeling. Just as Lady Roshan did, he thought of her as a new relative, a younger sister.
But Rosenin was different. She soon fell deeply in love with the handsome and kind knight. Mistaking the attention he showed her as affection, she was eager to be with him even a little more.
So she was jealous of Lady Roshan. She hated, envied, and resented her for being so casual with Sir Ayres. This was the reason for her inferiority complex and sense of inadequacy.
The problem was that every time Rosenin openly expressed her feelings for Sir Ayres, the gazes of the women around her became sharp.
They were intensely jealous of Rosenin, who not only clung to Lady Roshan’s side under the guise of being cousins but also received Sir Ayres’ attention. So, if they saw even a small gap, they would fiercely bite and ridicule her like fierce hunting dogs.
If Lady Roshan pressured them using the family name, they would quiet down for a while, but that was it.
Since a busy person like her couldn’t always be with Rosenin, there was plenty of time to look for opportunities. Since all that increased in high society was ‘patience,’ they just had to wait calmly.
“Rosenin didn’t return home even after the promised date had passed. She kept trying to stay at the mansion. Enduring the criticism and contempt that was poured on her. It must have been a painful time. Knowing that Mel didn’t see her as a woman, she repeated expectations and despair. But it didn’t last long.”
I suddenly thought I wanted to ask whether the sound of ‘didn’t last long’ that Lady Roshan said was ‘expectation’ or ‘despair.’
I wondered if the difference in the feelings she felt right before death, in that the malicious me had returned but she hadn’t, created the presence or absence of a miracle.
“I’m sorry, but I often think of Rosenin when I see you, Young Lady. I overlay her, who was vainly defeated. But I don’t always identify you with her. But Mel said he ‘saw an angel’ when he saw you. I still don’t know what that means.”
“Could it be that he also saw Lady Rosenin’s image in me?”
Lady Roshan shook her head.
“I thought so at first. Mel thought so too. But every time he visited the Dieunzel estate and came back after seeing you, Mel gradually stopped talking about Rosenin. And for the first time in his life, he began to suffer from lovesickness.”
Ah, now I understand. What Lady Roshan wants to say.
She was worried that Mel, who had lost his reason, might have spoken wrongly about Rosenin, causing me to doubt his love. So much so that she explained it in such detail.
“I won’t force you. But don’t waver or doubt.”
She doesn’t tell me to accept my feelings for Michael Ayres, but Lady Roshan has rushed over, braving rudeness, because she’s afraid that my gaze towards him might be distorted. And she defends Sir Ayres even while bringing up her own painful memories.
She acts as if the judgment is entirely up to me, but it seems she can’t help but lean towards her friend, showing her sincerity like that.
I even felt envious of the friendship she showed. It made me wonder what it would have been like if I had had even one such person in my past.
“Yes, I won’t. Sir Ayres really has a good friend.”
Lücette Roshan smiles brightly at my words. It was the brightest and most beautiful smile I had ever seen.
“Unexpectedly stubborn, so he’s just annoying. He probably thinks the same about me, right?”
In an instant, one bolt falls off with a clatter. The ‘guard’ that had been watching and tightly bound was being peeled off.
Ironically, the words meant to make me believe in Michael Ayres were transforming into affection for Lücette Roshan. Without either me or her knowing. How could this be? In the end, Lady Roshan had defended herself.
Is that why? For the first time since meeting Lady Roshan, the tension in my body was easing. The stiff spine melted away and relaxed, making the corset-tightened waist feel cool.
I found it so funny that I smiled brightly along with her. I couldn’t bear how surprising and amazing this unfamiliar feeling was. At the same time, I thought. I hope this feeling lasts even a little longer.
\*
As spring deepened, my radius of activity widened even more. Most of them were attending with Lady Roshan, but there were also gatherings that weren’t.
As people saw that I was spending more and more time by Lady Roshan’s side, they seemed to have completely recognized me as her companion.
So, after inviting only me separately, they even subtly urged me to introduce her. In particular, young ladies who didn’t have any particular allies were eager to cling to Lady Roshan.
They thought of me as a leech attached to Lady Roshan, but they were working hard to please me for the future. It was a funny thing.
They were deluded into thinking that if they became close to Lady Roshan, they could easily get rid of someone like me.
“I originally have difficulty saying nice things, so I’d like to take this opportunity to learn the Bischwartz Young Lady’s skills.”
Perhaps that’s why the absurd rumor that my specialty was flattery spread. The expression ‘lucky tongue’ was used as a euphemism to refer to me for a while for this reason.
But this gossip didn’t last long because I appeared at the party hosted by Princess Dieunzel.
People were very surprised to see me greeting Princess Dieunzel with a smile and naturally blending into her group.
It was amazing that a young girl who hadn’t even debuted in high society was maintaining friendships with two people who were expected to become big shots in the future.
Not like Roena, who was active with Madame de Lavalier’s halo behind her.
“No, let’s think about it differently. Judging by her friendship with Lady Roshan, Pulcher must be behind the Bischwartz Young Lady. Otherwise, how could she be so active?”
“I heard she was invited to the Empress’s palace last time, and judging by the fact that nothing has been said about it yet, it must have been pretty good. Could she have caught Pulcher’s eye at that time?”
“Maybe. That makes sense. That must be why she’s also friends with the Dieunzel Young Lady.”
Around that time, Madame de Châteauroux’s social activities were becoming even more intense. As if she were making up for being locked up all this time, she roamed around the palace even more boldly and daringly.
It was in the same vein that she would fearlessly approach and provoke the Baroness of Flanders or the Empress if they were attending the same ball.
She had gained confidence that it would eventually return to her due to this incident. She was a woman who even wrapped the Emperor around her skirt and wielded him as she pleased, so there was nothing more to fear.
But even that Chatoul couldn’t send me letters or approach me again. It was because of the Crown Prince.
“Be grateful that he’s even blocking her. He’s helping you not to wallow in the mud.”
He often called me to be with Lady Roshan when he went to grand banquets or hunting grounds. Without allowing anyone else to join. He himself just stood indifferently in front of us.
To others, it was as if I belonged to the Crown Prince’s group, pretending like that.
Usually, people in high society only stay in one group. There was no one like me. That’s why the nobles were very interested in my actions, associating with Lady Roshan, associating with the Dieunzel Young Lady, and even encompassing the Crown Prince.
One day, a noble lady asked me this.
“Who are you closer to, Young Lady?”
At that time, Lady Roshan said just one word, raising my value in high society. It was truly exquisite timing.
“I just follow where Sis goes.”
It was tantamount to admitting that the initiative was completely in my hands. She was saying out loud that my existence was that precious.
“Sis is my irreplaceable precious friend. I can give my life for her.”
High society began to seriously consider my charm, which had captured not only Michael Ayres but also Lücette de Roshan. They were curious about what she habitually called ‘loveliness.’
Some even asked directly to my face. Especially the old ladies who dominated high society. They were watching this situation as if it were interesting.
Whenever that happened, I pretended to be clumsy, as if I were embarrassed but should never show it, and showed a naive reaction of ‘I don’t know.’
The appearance of covering my cheeks, which weren’t even red, with both hands and not knowing what to do was a pure appearance that couldn’t be seen in cunning young ladies.
The young ladies might have looked at it unpleasantly, but for the old ladies who had escaped the Colosseum of high society and were spending a comfortable old age, there was no behavior as pleasing as this ‘cuteness.’
On top of that, I perfectly imitated Roena de Bishbalz, so even their seasoned eyes could be completely deceived.
“Oh my, to think she would be this lovely.”
“The Bischwartz Young Lady is truly a remarkable girl.”
“It’s no wonder Lady Roshan proudly calls the Bischwartz Young Lady her friend. Who else has shown such pure beauty at this age?”
The innate loveliness they define is something that shines on top of an extremely aristocratic attitude.
That’s why, when I, who had been belittled for my insignificant status, perfectly showed the appearance of an aristocratic young lady, they couldn’t help but utter words of praise, even if they had some doubts.
It was because they expected that I, who was more aristocratic than the aristocrats, would be a fresh stimulus to their boring lives.
“I hope you will visit here later with Madame de Lavalier. You are sincerely welcome.”
As things turned out this way, the Empress’s side began to move. They didn’t like the way I was gradually expanding my territory through deceptive socializing, so they suddenly sent an invitation to Lady Roshan—the Empress’s palace, where she had been able to come and go without any contact—and called her.
