134 - Pieces of the Broken Glass Slipper
Shattered Glass Slipper Shards 134
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The letters Sir Ayres usually sent always had a strong, deeply pressed quality to them, concise and to the point.
But the letters now were slanted to one side, as if written in haste. This made me think of one thing.
He heard it from the Crown Prince.
It was common courtesy to send a letter a day in advance when requesting a visit, but ignoring this and saying he would come without warning left no room for other interpretations.
Suddenly, I remembered the Crown Prince's voice, confidently telling me not to worry. Did he fail to persuade Sir Ayres? It seems I'll have to clean up the mess after all. The thought of taking on unexpected work made me smile wryly.
Anyway, since he's coming, I can't greet him in bed. I said to Blan,
"We need to finish all the preparations before Sir Ayres arrives. We need to move quickly."
Shortly after, at noon, Sir Ayres arrived.
Judging from his handwriting, I thought he would be very agitated, but his expression as he greeted me calmly was no different from usual.
He even smiled as the maid brought in refreshments and set them down, engaging in trivial small talk.
Therefore, if I hadn't accidentally noticed the blue veins standing out on the back of his hand resting on his knee, I would have been completely fooled.
It was around that time that Sir Ayres began to talk about the Crown Prince.
At first, I thought he was just giving me information as promised, but gradually the conversation took a strange turn.
He suddenly started talking only about the Crown Prince's womanizing and the various incidents that had occurred because of it. As if he was trying to 'keep me in check.'
"I should definitely let Roena know," I said, pretending not to know and casually brushing it off, his expression only hardening. Michael Ayres took a sip of the lukewarm tea, as if his throat was dry, and continued to speak. This time, he was a little more direct.
"I heard from His Highness that there will be several days when you must be together. Therefore, caught between a small attachment and hope, and a heart-wrenching pain, I dare to ask. What is the reason for your acceptance?"
His face was full of fear and anxiety, but there was a pitiful soul here who couldn't let go of some expectation, unaware that he was withering away. Ah, a sight so familiar to me.
Sir Ayres wanted to hear from my mouth that 'I was forced by His Highness.' He was acting so desperately, as if he wanted to believe that I would never have agreed to such a request otherwise.
He always said it was for Roena's sake, but it was only possible because he couldn't really 'be sure' if that was the case. So he must be so childishly anxious, having thrown away his pride and everything else. Because he was always a loser when it came to love.
"It's for Roena."
And to show such a miserable expression, as if about to collapse, at this answer.
Perhaps there was no 'reason' or 'sense of reality' in his head. If there was anything, it was just a fragile man craving affection.
"Is that all? Truly?"
His voice trembled as he asked again. It was a pitifully desperate emotion.
It was pounding on my hardened heart, pleading desperately. 'Please, just open the door. Don't you feel sorry for me?' Just like I used to.
I tried to maintain a kind attitude and said to him. My lips were trembling so much that they felt like they were about to spasm.
"Then do you need something else?"
In the past, I had heard the words, 'Even if there is, what does it have to do with you, young lady?' in this situation. So I knew how maddening those words could be. I also knew that it would become the seed of an obsession that would destroy oneself.
But now that I've come back, I felt like I knew why those words came out in this situation.
But I couldn't make the mistake of stirring up trouble and making a snake appear. I blinked innocently, pretending not to know. I revealed a light action containing many meanings solely for him.
You're not the only man I'm pushing away. Right now, I only want to blend in well with the Count's family. So don't worry about unnecessary things.
And this was the best consideration I could give to Michael Ayres.
But he didn't open his mouth easily, as if he didn't like my answer. He just stared at me with confused eyes, as if he couldn't understand what I meant.
It was as if a desire to know my true feelings but being unable to, and a mind tormented by being unable to control this, were chaotically intertwined.
I said soothingly in a soft voice.
"I don't know what I did to make you doubt me, but I have always treated you with a consistent attitude. That goes for His Highness the Crown Prince as well. Ah, what should I do for you to understand my sincerity? Would you believe me if I swore?"
Since I didn't believe in God, I could make these false oaths as much as I wanted. What would it matter if my tongue wore out a little?
Therefore, if a few simple words could prove a person's heart, I didn't care if my conscience was tainted.
But perhaps the word 'swear' was the answer, as his face suddenly relaxed.
He must not have thought that I would dare to lie before God. At the same time, he seemed embarrassed that he had doubted me even for a moment, and he flustered noticeably, saying, 'It's okay.'
He was so sorry that he repeated the words asking for forgiveness for his rudeness a full ten times.
"No, it's okay. You're saying that because you're worried about me. Rather, I'm just grateful that you came running like this."
"I'm ashamed, Lady."
"No, Sir Aires. It's only natural. I can be happier in the future if you believe in me. So you'll keep helping me, right?"
"Of course. I always wish only for your happiness."
Freed from doubt, he had returned to being a more cheerful and considerate man.
He was occasionally jealous that Lady Roshan and I called each other by nicknames, but he soon showed a magnanimous side, saying that she would be a good friend to me. I thought he would ask to be called 'Sis' too.
After a few more words, he said it was time to go and got up from his seat, looking regretful.
His expression as he turned away was always full of lingering feelings. So today, I decided to escort him to the front gate. That way, it seemed like he wouldn't have any other thoughts.
Michael Ayres tried to get my attention by talking about his recent activities as he walked down the hallway.
It was a very monotonous daily life of entering the palace for training and then reading in his remaining time, but he tried to describe it in detail, which was quite pitiful.
So I pretended to 'listen' diligently, chiming in with a few words here and there. The door was soon visible, so it seemed like I only had to endure a little longer.
But meeting Sir Halberd along the way caused our steps, as well as the somewhat friendly atmosphere, to 'freeze' completely. It was because of the two men looking at each other as if they had made a sudden promise.
No, they weren't looking. It would be more accurate to say they were glaring. Like that day at the Founding Day, they were sharply staring at each other, bristling with tension.
"In the end, there is only one Floral Crown that found its owner," Michael Ayres said after a while, throwing out a word that was hard to understand. His voice was so cold that my body trembled.
"That's officially the case, but you never know," Sir Halberd replied. The voice flowing from his mouth was very polite, but as cold as Michael Ayres.
The air around us was getting heavier and heavier, as if a sword fight would break out at any moment. Even though neither of their hands were on the swords hanging from their waists, I felt that way.
"It's a shame we didn't settle things back then. If we had, there wouldn't have been any room for doubt. Wouldn't you agree, Sir Halberd?"
"That's what I should be saying, Sir Aires."
"Then I'll wait for the day when we compete again someday. There won't be the same luck as last time."
"I'm also eagerly awaiting that day."
As the time the two men confronted each other grew longer, the footsteps of the maids and servants walking around them were slowing down.
So I wondered if I should rudely interrupt their conversation. I didn't want to become a spectacle any longer.
Fortunately, the conversation seemed to be over, as Aires suddenly greeted Halberd.
Halberd also accepted it with a polite attitude, as if he had never responded coldly. And after asking for my understanding, he left the scene.
It was a somewhat anticlimactic ending for people who had been having a conversation while emitting a fierce aura until just now.
Michael Ayres continued to look at Halberd's back until he disappeared. And when I, tired of waiting, was starting to get angry, he suddenly spat out a word that I couldn't understand.
"Lady."
"Yes?"
"I hope you will keep the consistent behavior you mentioned to everyone. Otherwise, I will be very sad."
Was it my imagination? For a moment, I thought I saw my old self in his eyes. The her who had been driven mad by love.
I nodded with an awkward smile. The anxiety that I shouldn't answer aloud led to the action.
Was it a big mistake to think that I could use him well if I kept the 'line' and coaxed him because he resembled me?
Suddenly, this anxiety was creeping up on me. At the same time, I was reminded of my past self, who could only be controlled by 'death.'
So for the first time, I couldn't take my eyes off his back as he disappeared on his horse.
Marie, who had come to pick me up for lunch, was looking at me with a sly smile, but I didn't have time to pay attention to such things. I just chased after the remaining shadow, repeating the words he had uttered over and over again.
So, who is it that will be sad, between 'otherwise' and 'very'?
But no matter how much I thought about it, I couldn't figure it out. Only frustration was piling up.
Lüce Roshan came to see me the day after Michael Ayres' visit. She also thought she had shown some courtesy by sending a small note in the morning, but she didn't even give me a chance to reply.
Fortunately, unlike with Aires, I had woken up early in the morning, so it wasn't difficult to prepare to greet her.
"I'm sorry for being rude. I should have waited for a reply, but I couldn't."
Like calls to like. Her actions were exactly the same. I said it was okay with an awkward smile. Considering what she had done for me so far, I could gladly tolerate this much rudeness.
"This is the first time His Highness has failed to persuade Mel. He always listened to His Highness's words. So I couldn't help but worry."
"If you doubted Sir's gentlemanliness, I would like to say that there is no need to do so at all. He just politely asked for the reason."
"Oh, if that were the case, I wouldn't have come to see you like this. I know Mel's gentlemanliness very well. I was just anxious that you might have heard a different story."
Lücette Roshan continued to speak with a serious expression.
"It's the story about my cousin that you've been hearing lately. About that poor child."
