Chapter 72
72
Why you, of all people, dare to…
He caught sight of Leila beyond the carriage window, where she’d glanced carelessly.
She was dressed up more carefully than usual, walking down the bustling street with girls her age. Among them was one face familiar to Mathias’s eyes. The teacher who had come with Leila on that picnic to Arbis. Her name was Grever, wasn’t it?
Mathias gazed at Leila with narrowed eyes as she walked the street with quick, clipped steps. She had noticeably thinned, but her expression was quite bright and gentle. She smiled brightly and chattered away happily. It was utterly different from the way she appeared to him lately—so much so that it felt like looking at an entirely different woman.
The carriage carrying Mathias soon passed that street. But even after Leila vanished from sight, he stared blankly out the window for a while longer.
At least she wasn’t wasting away on the brink of death. Should he call that a relief?
Relief mingled strangely with irritation.
Over the past few weeks, the Leila that Mathias had seen was consistently listless. With a dry, expressionless face like someone enduring tedious work, she would come to the annexe, undress herself, and sit quietly at the edge of the bed. She acted just like a worn-out whore, yet the moment he approached, she couldn’t hide her fear and anxiety.
Mathias gladly respected the intentions of that ridiculous mistress of his.
If she wanted to be treated like a paid woman, then so be it. It was what she had chosen herself, after all. But the more he insulted and manhandled her roughly, the more Mathias felt as though it was he himself being trampled underfoot.
When the face of the woman who moved like a doll with all thoughts and emotions switched off twisted in pain and shame, his mind eased. At least it was proof she wasn’t treating him like some invisible ghost. So he would torment her even more obsessively, making her cry, and then a sense of emptiness and satisfaction would flood him at once. But even that moment didn’t last long. Once Leila slumped, panting and sobbing before going still and quiet, all that remained was himself—helpless against a woman already in his possession.
Why you, of all people, dare to…
When clear, seething anger rose to the top of his head, Mathias would recall that late spring night last year when Ratz had bloomed with roses. The night he first learned through his mother that Leila Llewellyn was to marry Kyle Etman—the night he had wanted to kill someone for the first time in his life. Perhaps it wasn’t the doctor’s son he wanted to kill, but this woman, he thought every time he looked at Leila as she turned her back to him and curled up.
Of course, he couldn’t deny the pleasure Leila Llewellyn brought him was great enough to summon her back again regardless. She provoked him with her insolent attitude only to stiffen like a block of wood and tremble—yet without fail, she drove him mad. For Mathias, who had never placed this kind of desire at the top of his life’s priorities or let himself be swayed by it, it was bewildering, but it was undeniably true.
“Um…… Master?”
He turned at the cautious call and saw the open carriage door and the attendant standing beyond it.
Mathias steadied his breath before stepping out of the carriage. Company executives who had come out to the entrance lobby greeted him.
Before entering the building lined with grand neoclassical columns, Mathias suddenly turned his head to gaze down at the sunlit street. He already knew Leila wouldn’t be passing by on that road with her smile.
Brushing aside lingering thoughts with a wry self-mockery, Mathias stepped forward again with his usual composed smile.
Bill Leamer had left. Carrying a large suitcase, he departed with the resolute stride of a soldier heading to the front lines.
Leila saw him off all the way to the end of Platanus Avenue. Not just Bill Leamer—the garden workers leaving with him made the usually quiet road lively and boisterous.
The greenhouse’s glass walls, shattered by the explosion, had now been repaired, but the harsh winter cold that had swept through in the meantime had killed off most of the plants. Replacing those rare species of flowers and trees wouldn’t be easy, with so many precious varieties. But Bill Leamer had a duty to see it done.
Leila worried about him working day and night, but Uncle Bill said instead that atoning this way put his mind at ease. She could tell from his expression alone that he meant it.
“It’s cold, Leila! Go inside!”
Bill, who had turned the corner, suddenly stopped and shouted back.
Leila nodded but couldn’t bring herself to turn away just yet. He had to visit famous imperial horticulturists, botanical gardens, and noble houses’ greenhouses to procure the needed varieties. It would take at least a few weeks, and the thought of spending that long alone in Arbis made everything feel overwhelming. She even wanted to go with Uncle Bill. She knew how strange and suspicious that would sound, so she couldn’t bring herself to say it.
The noisy farewell soon came to an end.
Left alone on the road after the group of men departed, Leila stared blankly at the empty path. The sound of an approaching automobile from down the road jolted her back. Not wanting to run into the duke, she hurriedly turned and quickened her pace, but she couldn’t outrun the speeding car.
Soon, the black automobile passed by Leila standing at the roadside. Clutching her hands together, she kept her head firmly turned away until the car disappeared into Arbis.
It’s nothing anyway.
She repeated it desperately to herself as her heart pounded anxiously. Uncle Bill’s absence had nothing to do with the duke.
Once the car was out of sight, Leila hurried back to the cottage. Cleaning the house and finishing the ironing calmed her mind considerably. These days, such mundane routines were her greatest comfort. Thinking that life went on indifferently made even that one man seem insignificant.
She had thought, on the day she saw Mathias with Claudine who had visited Arbis before the marriage, that he would probably discard her. Standing side by side, they looked perfectly suited, as if they existed for each other. From a distance, Leila could clearly sense how much the duke cherished and cared for Claudine. That day, Leila had circled far around to return to the cottage without being seen. Perhaps because the weather had been quite chilly, her cheeks stayed flushed for a long time.
Phoebe, carrying the duke’s letter, alighted on the windowsill just as Leila was about to sit at her desk. Even at this unusually early hour, that man made his demand without hesitation.
Leila tore the letter into pieces and tossed them into the hearth flames, then hurriedly fed the livestock their evening meal and secured the doors. Heading to the annexe with neither haste nor hesitation, she habitually imagined the life after escaping the duke’s grasp.
Let’s leave for a distant city with Uncle Bill. Somewhere down south bordering Robita wouldn’t be bad. Someday, travel with Uncle Bill to find birds from tropical islands and icy lands, and someday, set up a home together where we can tend a little flower bed, and…
As she tried to reconnect her halted thoughts, Leila reached the road where the annexe came into view. The sunset over the riverside was beautiful. Leila decided to think only of that.
If it’s on a time limit anyway, the pain isn’t much. Enduring and bearing it was something she’d repeated countless times since childhood; she was used to it now.
With her resolve firm, Leila strode forward, her slender shadow stretching long behind her.
Aside from the fact that the sun hadn’t set yet, the scene in the annexe bedroom was no different from usual. The large bed. The fireplace with light spilling from it. Furniture with elegant sheen and restrained decorations. And the naked woman.
Mathias glanced briefly at the small body that now felt like part of the room before lowering his eyes to the stack of documents on his lap.
The scale of Herhardt family business had grown too vast to contain within the family estate walls. His grandfather and father, foreseeing it would be impossible for the family head to oversee it all, had poured their efforts into building the company’s structure, and now it was stabilized. Thus, Mathias’s role was to oversee and decide. It was a skill he’d mastered since boyhood, but the world changed rapidly in these turbulent times.
Mathias carefully reviewed the reports on mining rights and oil fields in overseas territories. Occasionally, he lifted his gaze to check the naked woman on the bed diagonally across from him, then returned to his work as if nothing were amiss. Instead of the usual moans and cries, the bedroom was filled only with the peaceful sounds of crackling firewood and rustling paper.
Leila, who had been staring blankly at her own toes, finally raised her eyes slowly after the deepening darkness had erased the last traces of sunset. The duke, who would normally stride over to sate his lust, treated her today like she was invisible for some reason.
Leila swallowed dryly and lifted her limp arm to cover her chest, where goosebumps had risen. A sidelong glance showed the duke still seated by the fireplace, absorbed in his documents. He had watched her undress upon entering the bedroom, but that was it. For quite a long time, he focused solely on his own work.
As the duke set down a thick stack of documents after jotting a note, their eyes met. Leila hunched her shoulders smaller and hastily bowed her head. When he stood as if changing his mind at the last moment, she absurdly felt a twinge of relief. She had to endure that pain quickly to be able to leave him.
But Mathias’s footsteps headed not toward Leila, but toward the bedroom door. Stunned, Leila frowned as she watched him go. From beyond the half-open door came the low sound of him on the phone with someone. It seemed business-related.
After issuing a few polite but firm instructions, the duke returned to the bedroom. She had forgotten to look away, so their eyes met again, but he showed no reaction. He looked down at her with the detached appreciation of one admiring displayed artwork, then casually returned to his chair.
Reclining with his long legs stretched onto the ottoman, the duke picked up another document from the side table stack. Amid the sound of turning pages, the faint melody of a waltz drifted in. Realizing it came from the phonograph in the drawing room, Leila’s eyes wavered.
What on earth…
With a deeply furrowed brow, Leila found her glasses on the nightstand and put them on. The duke, twirling a pen in one hand as he read, turned his gaze toward her.
Even with her glasses on, Leila still couldn’t read his expression. But reality sharpened into focus, and suddenly her own appearance felt unbearably shameful.
Mathias set the documents on his lap and tilted his head slightly, watching her.
Her cheeks flushing as she fumbled about, Leila hurriedly found her undergarments and put them on. She glanced at him furtively—one, then another. With each piece of clothing she put back on herself, her cheeks grew redder.
So aloof when naked, but at a loss once fully dressed—what was that about?
As Mathias tapped the documents lightly in time with the waltz rhythm, Leila—now flushed all over—stood from the bed.
Her lips parted, then she ducked her head; she tried to speak again but averted her eyes languidly. Only after a long moment did Leila meet his gaze steadily. Mathias stopped twirling his pen and met her eyes calmly.
With the moonlight filtering through the half-open curtains at her back, Leila asked in a trembling voice that carried a surprisingly clear ring, enunciating each word.
“What on earth are you doing right now?”
