While Others Became Female Leads In Romantic Fantasy Novels, I Became A Closet Monster
Chapter 48
It was past the point of being a mere nuisance; she was suffering from nightmares.
Despite Joanna’s distress, her parents had spent the entire time hounding her, demanding she apologize to Somerset immediately.
However, Joanna ignored them completely and holed herself up in the library.
She wanted to understand the emotion she had felt after hearing those words from Dedrick.
「The words telling me to give up for my own sake.」
Now, she clearly understood what that feeling was.
The shame of still being unable to break free from her parents’ shadow, the humiliation of having that exposed, and the gratitude and affection toward Dedrick—who, unlike anyone else, had seen Joanna for who she truly was.
By the time all those swirling emotions had settled, Joanna’s affection for him had, unfortunately, only grown deeper.
‘He said those things for me.’
Thus, while she had no choice for now, she wanted to prepare herself steadily until she reached adulthood, so she could live a dignified life without being swayed by anyone.
‘If I appear before him as a wonderful woman, Dedrick-nim might even come to like me a little.’
Joanna’s cheeks flushed shyly. At that moment, a small shadow hopped up behind her and gave her shoulder a playful shove.
“Kyaaaak!”
“Haha!”
At the sound of a clear, refreshing voice laughing heartily, a vein popped on Joanna’s forehead.
“Ebony Silius!”
“Joanna, why so serious? Oh, is it because of Young Lord Somerset?”
“Will you shut your mouth?”
“Kyaa! Joanna’s trying to hit me!”
“Ebony!”
“Alright, alright. Your veins are going to burst. Calm down, the banquet hasn’t even started yet.”
“Just who do you think I’m like this because of….”
Fuming, Joanna let out a sigh and shook her head.
“Haven’t you grown up at all? Your maid must have a hard time.”
“That’s my charm, isn’t it?”
“Don’t make me laugh, honestly.”
“Since we’re already here, let’s go together.”
Ebony linked arms with Joanna, telling her to calm down.
Joanna glared at Ebony but didn’t push her away.
Ebony was a year older than Joanna, but she was still as innocent as a child. That bright personality was, of course, thanks to her parents, the Count and Countess Silius.
The Silius couple loved and cherished Ebony dearly. It was only natural that Ebony, raised in such affection, would be bright.
As a result, Axel also took a liking to her, and the Grand Duchess approached her upon learning this; however, when Ebony said she didn’t like the idea, the Silius family refused flatly.
Even so, the reason the Grand Duchess couldn’t treat them poorly was that the Count’s family was one of the influential powerhouses with significant political sway.
Joanna was always envious of Ebony. She wanted to be a princess in a fairy tale, but since Ebony already possessed everything she desired, she also felt a sense of jealousy.
“By the way, was it Young Lord Dedrick?”
The moment that name slipped through Ebony’s lips, Joanna’s expression turned fierce.
“……You.”
“Hey, I haven’t told anyone.”
Joanna had been agonizing alone after realizing her feelings for Dedrick, but under the prodding of Ebony, who had come to visit, she had no choice but to spill everything.
So, Ebony roughly knew the situation. She knew how Joanna felt.
“I am curious, though. Will we see him at this banquet?”
“I don’t know…. I told you.”
Joanna glanced around before whispering softly to Ebony.
“Dedrick-nim is definitely being discriminated against by the Grand Duchess. Her reputation is already bad, so she’ll be even more determined not to let Dedrick-nim out in public… Huh?”
Joanna stopped mid-sentence and stared blankly ahead.
She saw the back of a boy with pitch-black hair, dressed in a perfectly tailored banquet suit.
There was only one person other than the Grand Duke who possessed hair the color of the midnight sky.
“It’s Dedrick-nim….”
Only then did Ebony follow Joanna’s gaze. She saw him, standing a bit shorter than others his age.
“He’s small?”
“He’ll grow soon.”
“I suppose, since he’s in a growth spurt. His clothes fit him well enough.”
At those words, a sense of foreboding crawled down Joanna’s spine.
“You, don’t you dare approach Dedrick-nim. I’m telling you clearly! I’m first!”
Until now, everyone she had been interested in had been snatched away by Ebony.
Ebony never turned away those who approached her. Thanks to that, Joanna was always pushed to the background, but this time, she absolutely did not want to lose.
“Joanna, you know me. I can’t just pass by someone pitiable.”
“I’ll take care of it myself.”
“Alright, alright. What a temper!”
Ebony laughed and tried to link arms with Joanna again, but this time she was rejected.
“I’m not joking. He is the person who made me realize something important. Don’t approach him this time.”
“Oh, Joanna. Have I ever approached them on purpose? Do you still think I stole those people from you? Is that why you’re sulking? I thought we cleared up the misunderstanding and were getting along?”
“You’re the only one getting along.”
Because Joanna was the one who always had to endure.
She stepped past Ebony and walked ahead.
“Joanna is really something. That’s why the other kids avoid her for being prickly! She should try being a bit kinder! Don’t you think so, Soi?”
Instead of answering, Soi simply shook her head. Though it wasn’t an intentional act, her mistress had unintentionally stolen the people around Joanna.
Her mistress knew this, too, but didn’t bother to push them away. Her reasoning was that the other person would be sad if she rejected them.
Thus, Ebony did not block those who came, nor did she hold onto those who left.
Soi knew very well how that personality appeared to others. So, after a moment of hesitation, she offered cautious advice.
“It would be best to be careful, My Lady. It won’t look good to other people.”
“But this is just my personality. My parents told me to do as I wish, too!”
As always, Soi’s opinion did not reach her.
I flinched, startled by the sudden scream.
‘That scared me. What was that?’
Looking back, I saw a girl laughing while holding her stomach, and Joanna was getting angry at her.
It seemed the laughing girl had startled Joanna, causing her to scream.
I was about to dismiss it as nothing special, but I flinched when I saw the laughing girl’s appearance.
‘Wait, that girl….’
My eyes widened as I watched the girl laughing with a refreshingly clear voice.
‘It’s the female lead! Ebony Silius!’
My eyes sparkled.
To finally see the female lead of this novel!
She wasn’t as beautiful as Joanna, just as described in the novel, but she had a friendly and cute appearance that would likely win anyone’s favor.
She was a lovely girl with long, deep sky-blue hair and pale pink eyes.
‘She was two years older than Didi.’
And a year older than Joanna.
However, in terms of mental age, Ebony was likely the youngest.
She was a princess raised with an abundance of love, possessing a charm that drew everyone in with her characteristically innocent personality.
Joanna and Ebony were close friends, but unfortunately, they would experience a bitter falling out once they reached adulthood.
Due to the hostility toward a romantic rival….
‘A common cliché.’
In truth, Joanna had been more conscious of Ebony than anyone else since they were young.
In terms of status, Joanna came from a higher-ranking Marquis family, yet while her parents groveled to the Grand Duchess, Ebony’s family was dignified.
Furthermore, Ebony was the center of attention wherever she went. Out of a hundred people who approached Joanna, attracted by her looks, a hundred would turn to Ebony, charmed by her brightness.
Because of that, Joanna had an inferiority complex toward Ebony. And to think they would even fall for the same person.
They looked close now, but it was a precarious relationship indeed….
‘Based on the narrative alone, Joanna is the one who feels like protagonist material.’
A life lived being swayed by her parents since childhood….
It’s tragic. She really could have become someone great.
Dedrick’s lips twitched as if he had something else to say to me.
But in the end, he couldn’t say it and pressed his lips thin.
Watching him, I covered my mouth with my hands.
“What was that just now? Didi is so cute! I almost hugged him!”
I stomped my feet in place, unable to actually hold him. Dedrick looked like he was about to cry as he watched me.
It seemed he was frustrated because he wanted to do something too.
I quickly followed behind Dedrick as he walked again with his shoulders slumped.
Then, I glanced back.
Joanna was walking toward us with a fast pace, and behind her, I could see Ebony staring intently at Dedrick’s back.
