43
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You can't have everything. If you gain something, you have to give up something too. Aileen decided not to regret her choice.
However, it was inevitable to feel regret for the path not taken.
She sat across from him at the old dining table and picked up a sandwich. Taking a large bite, she chewed and swallowed her futile and meaningless thoughts along with the sandwich.
The sandwich was delicious. It was definitely made with the same ingredients and in the same way, but unlike when she ate alone, it tasted much richer, almost strangely so. She chewed with her mouth full, pondering this enormous difference in taste.
There was only one thing that had changed. It was the person. She wondered if it was because Cesare had cut the baguette so well, but it seemed it was simply because she was with him.
How could she not enjoy a meal with her favorite person in the most comfortable and familiar place?
"It's delicious."
She was eating the sandwich with gusto when she felt a gaze on her face, making her movements slow down.
She glanced across at Cesare, who was staring intently at her. Aileen held the sandwich in one hand and brushed her cheek and lips with the other, wondering if she had something on her face.
Cesare, still staring intently, said with a smile in his voice, "You don't have anything on your face. Nothing at all."
"Then why..."
"I've been wanting to look into your eyes for a long time."
He narrowed his eyes slightly.
"If I had known that was the reason, I would have taken them off a long time ago."
For a moment, she was confused whether he was talking about her glasses or her clothes. But since it couldn't be the latter, Aileen carefully replied to Cesare, "If you,"
"You?"
She quickly corrected her title at his short question.
"If, if Cesare-nim likes it, I'll go around like this from now on. I think I'll look a little less gloomy this way."
She was still concerned about her eyes. But since Cesare liked it, she was willing to be a little more courageous.
Honestly, it would be funny to wear a sparkling, ornate wedding dress with messy hair and glasses.
'And if the dress is flashy, people won't look at my face. I should ask them to minimize the hair accessories so people won't focus on my face.'
Aileen glanced at Cesare's sandwich, thinking thoughts that would make the dressmakers faint.
"But, don't you like the sandwich?"
He hadn't taken a single bite. She was embarrassed because she was eating so deliciously. She had confidently made it, saying it was easy since all she had to do was assemble the ingredients, but it seemed like something was wrong. She really had no talent for cooking.
"I... I think it's delicious..."
She looked at the sandwich to check it, and some sauce dripped onto her hand. Just as she was internally scolding herself for constantly showing such clumsy behavior,
Cesare beckoned her with his hand. She didn't take the sandwich he offered, so she tilted her head and offered her sauce-covered hand.
Since the table wasn't wide, he easily grabbed Aileen's wrist. She thought he was going to wipe her hand, but something completely unimaginable happened.
"Gasp!"
He licked Aileen's finger. While she was trembling in surprise, his red tongue licked up her finger. He tasted her pink fingernail and lightly bit the end of her finger before letting go of her wrist.
The sauce was gone, but a faint tooth mark remained on her finger. She stared blankly at his mark before looking at Cesare. He was finally eating his sandwich and replied, "I think it's delicious too. You made it well."
Only Aileen's face turned completely red at his calm review. Aileen flailed her bitten hand in the air, then carefully grabbed the sandwich and continued eating.
But unlike before, she couldn't taste anything. She mechanically bit and swallowed the sandwich, trying not to look at the finger he had bitten.
Aileen was always surprised when Cesare did things like this, but she didn't dislike it. In fact, she was embarrassed for another reason.
She felt strange when he made sexual advances toward her. Whenever she felt a sensual feeling, her back tingled and her legs felt ticklish.
It would be fine if it was just ticklish, but the problem was that she kept getting a little wet. It wasn't the first time she had felt the sticky sensation of her underwear sticking to her skin.
Every time she saw the mark of her round, wet underwear, Aileen was filled with self-loathing for her unchaste self. She felt like she was pursuing too many lewd desires. Cesare had awakened Aileen's senses, who hadn't known anything before, so she felt somewhat wronged...
It was the same now. The sensual feeling that had started when he rubbed her palm in the drawing room earlier continued to linger ambiguously inside her. Then, as soon as he licked her finger with his tongue, it suddenly started to run wild inside her.
'What should I do...'
Aileen squeezed her eyes shut. She couldn't concentrate on eating because of the sensation she felt in her secret place. She put down the sandwich she had eaten more than half of and glanced at Cesare.
He had already finished his sandwich neatly and was now watching Aileen intently. Aileen quickly lowered her gaze to the table. She felt like if she met his eyes, he would read all the lewd thoughts inside her.
"Aileen."
"...Y-Yes?!"
Aileen, who had been anxiously worrying to herself, was so startled that her shoulders jumped. Her shrill, cracked voice pierced the quiet brick house ceiling.
"What are you thinking about?"
When she didn't answer readily, Cesare asked again, as if asking about the taste of the sandwich.
"Lewd thoughts?"
Aileen froze with her mouth open. She had to deny it, but she had already missed the moment to do so.
What to do. What to do. What to do. All sorts of thoughts ran through her head, but in the end, she couldn't say anything and lowered her head.
She felt like crying. To him, she was now someone who couldn't cut her own hair, couldn't cook, and only had lewd thoughts. It was a truly unfortunate thing for Aileen, who wanted to look cool to Cesare in her own way.
Cesare briefly covered his lips with the back of his hand. But his eyes, revealed above his hand, were already bent with laughter. Aileen didn't know why he was laughing, so she sadly stared at the half-eaten sandwich.
If she had bangs and glasses at times like this, she could cover her face a little bit... She was thinking that when,
"Is your bedroom still the same?"
She slowly raised her gaze at the languid voice. He gave a smile that made people misunderstand.
"Show it to me, Aileen."
"......"
It was over. It was completely over now. No matter what Cesare said, she only had lewd thoughts.
Aileen jumped up, grabbed the finished plates, and ran to the kitchen. She was embarrassed and ran away, but Cesare followed Aileen in just a few steps.
"There's nothing special on the second floor... But if you still want to see it, let's go up together."
Reluctantly, she hesitated toward the stairs, but her body was suddenly lifted up. He had picked Aileen up in his arms.
"Ah! Your Grace!"
"You're doing it again."
"Ah, I'm sorry. Cesare-nim, please put me down."
"Your feet are small, so it's dangerous."
Cesare carried the struggling Aileen in his arms and went up the stairs. It was nonsense that the stairs were dangerous because her feet were small. But Cesare didn't let go of Aileen in the end, and Aileen finally arrived on the second floor, quietly held in his arms.
On the second floor, there was Aileen's bedroom, a storage room, and a small study. In fact, there was nothing that he would be interested in, but Cesare looked around the second floor with interested eyes. And when he entered Aileen's bedroom, he let out a soft sigh.
Cesare took a deep breath and exhaled. He took in everything one by one: the cozy bedding, the small table, the sofa, the closet, and the bathroom. Finally, he looked at Aileen, who was still in his arms.
Aileen, who had been wriggling in embarrassment, stiffened when their eyes met. A wave was rising in his red eyes. A low murmur fell into her ear.
"It's all your scent."
