Translator: Nox

Ch#79

“If I really was their daughter, if I really was their family, then why……!”

It was supposed to be the day of my first Beast Transformation, a day blessed by everyone.

But on that very day, Soya was abandoned by her father, had her Yeonghaek taken by her oppa, and was chased off to the Cold Palace.

Those three years she spent alone in the pitch-black, freezing Cold Palace.

More painful than the harassment from the maids……

More painful than the agony of having her Yeonghaek ripped out……

More painful than the cold, the hurt, and the hunger……

Was the loneliness and isolation that seeped into her very bones, tormenting her.

There, Soya longed for the father who had abandoned her, longed for the oppa who never came.

She endured three years of endless, aching longing that ultimately turned into loneliness, clinging to them all alone.

But in the end, her family turned their backs on her, and with Riri’s single plea to cast her aside, they abandoned her forever.

“Why did I have to go through all that?”

―…….

“If they were family……! If they were real family, then why……! Why on earth did they……!”

Her current oppa had said it.

Real family cherishes and protects each other no matter what they look like.

But they—the ones connected to her by blood—did not.

They hated her viciously, treated her coldly, persecuted her, and ultimately abandoned her.

She no longer thought of them as family now.

But Soya felt wronged.

Her irretrievable, uncompensable past was just too heartbreaking, too miserable, too unfair.

[However, great power comes with great sacrifice. The heavens are sometimes fair and just to a cruel degree.]

Suddenly, I-rim’s words from three years ago came to mind.

If being abandoned by her family was the price of awakening the divine beast. The price of possessing great power.

“That’s too cruel.”

Tears streamed down her cheeks.

“It’s too sad and horrific.”

Even as Soya wept, the scenes of the past unfolding before her eyes kept passing endlessly.

Madam’s condition, which had seemed to improve for a moment, worsened again.

―The Purifying Flame couldn’t save someone whose death was already fated, but it had extended her life for a time.

Madam endured ten more days after passing the night the physician had called critical, then closed her eyes forever in the Family Head’s arms.

Until the very end, wiping away tears of worry at leaving behind her young Soya……

“…….”

Soya squeezed her eyes shut in anguish, then opened them again.

Finally, the illusion shown by the flames faded away, and red feathers scattered softly around Soya.

Soya slowly raised both hands.

The Purifying Flame blooming in her palms soon blazed forth as if to engulf the entire world.

Soya closed her eyes and collapsed to the ground.

“Soya……!”

Her memory blacked out with that desperately calling voice.

* * *

Soya suffered through her Growth Pain.

Her head boiled feverishly, and her whole body felt like it was floating adrift, just like when she had a cold.

The unexpected first Growth Pain hurt terribly.

Soya had no memory for most of it, and whenever she came to her senses briefly, her father was always by her side.

“D……Daddy…….”

Soya called for her daddy in a voice hoarse and cracked from strain.

“Daddy, Daddy……. Don’t leave Soya behind. Soya doesn’t want to be alone. It’s so cold and scary.”

She sobbed endlessly, calling for her daddy.

“It’s okay, baby cotton ball. Daddy’s right here.”

Sa-eon soothed her with a deeply pained expression.

“Daddy’s right here with you. Don’t cry.”

Every time his hand patted her shoulder, Soya swallowed down her rising sobs with hiccups, only to pour them out again in fresh waves of misery.

Daddy, Father, Daddy……

Soya, Soya……

It’s so cold and scary……

Don’t hate Soya. Soya did something wrong……

Next time…… next time, Soya will definitely succeed. Soya will succeed perfectly……

So……

“Baby cotton ball didn’t do anything wrong. Daddy doesn’t hate baby cotton ball.”

“Hic, sniff. But. Don’t…….”

“Daddy loves you more than anything in the world, my baby.”

The world’s strongest embrace wrapped tightly around Soya.

“Daddy loves our baby cotton ball more than anything in the world.”

“Sniff, hic, sob, heup…….”

Daddy’s making such a sad face.

So I shouldn’t cry.

But, but it keeps feeling so sad, and the tears won’t stop.

“Daddy, Daddy, Daddy…….”

Even though her hazy mind couldn’t grasp what was making her so sad, Soya clung to Sa-eon and burst into tears from her overwhelming sorrow.

“Daddy…….”

She wailed like a child in her father’s arms.

When Soya opened her eyes again after the short but intense Growth Pain had passed.

She realized she was lying in her own room in Baekho Palace.

“Daddy……!”

Soya jolted upright in alarm.

She froze.

Kneeling on the floor with his head buried against her bedside, she found Sa-eon slumped over asleep.

“…….”

Soya blinked dazedly for a moment before gradually regaining her sense of reality.

“Why am I here…….”

What happened?

I was clearly fighting the venomous creature……

I met Jujak-nim and obtained the Purifying Flame……

It felt so hot and painful……

Did Father stay by my side the whole time I was suffering? But……

“Cotton ball?”

Sa-eon lifted his tousled head at Soya’s presence.

“Father, I, why…….”

She mumbled in bewilderment, when suddenly a single red feather caught her eye.

“……?”

Sa-eon let out a soft, exasperated chuckle at the sight of Soya blinking in surprise, and picked up the feather.

“Cool, right, cotton ball? Your feather sparkles like flame.”

He held it out to her with a grin.

“Congratulations on your growth, baby cotton ball.”

“……!”

Shock bloomed across Soya’s face.

“What’s this? Why are you being so docile? I thought you’d get mad now that you’ve grown and insist you’re not a baby cotton ball anymore.”

Sa-eon teased in a playful tone.

“You like having your first growth stage that much?”

“…….”

But Soya couldn’t answer easily.

Because she had spotted the wounds on her father’s body.

Sharp scratches like those from a baby bird’s claws, and red burns like from fire, marked Sa-eon’s body here and there.

“Father, these…….”

Soya grasped his wrist, where an especially deep scar remained, her voice trembling.

“Ah.”

Sa-eon flinched in surprise and tried to hide his wrist, but Soya had already seen everything.

“Did I do this?”

“No. This is…….”

“I did it, didn’t I? Right? I hurt Father, didn’t I?”

She had heard that those suffering Growth Pain became violent and aggressive.

It was her.

She had lost her reason and attacked her father.

“It’s not like that, baby cotton ball.”

“What do you mean it’s not? I did it, I hurt Father…….”

Poof—

Her teary body was suddenly pulled into his broad embrace.

“Daddy didn’t hurt at all.”

Sa-eon patted the child’s back soothingly.

“What parent would hurt seeing their child grow so cool like this?”

At those words, Soya’s throat ached painfully.

The man who had given her his blood abandoned her just for lacking that red feather.

But this father who had picked her up said everything about her was fine, was cool.

Even if her growth was slower than others.

Even without the red feather, or even with it.

Even though she had hurt him……

“Thanks for growing up so cool, my baby.”

He smiled at her and thanked her.

“Sniff, hic, waaah……!”

At the end of the Growth Pain that had been even more grueling because it came later than others’, Soya burst into fresh tears in her father’s arms.