Chapter 36
Episode 36. Constantly Making Me Smaller
“The Olivia Liberty I know is stronger than anyone else. So…”
But Margo couldn’t continue. Olivia slowly raised her head, her eyes filled with tears, shimmering.
“No, Professor…”
Her tears fell, soaking the hem of her skirt. Her voice was choked, cracking.
“I’m not strong. I… I didn’t want to be strong. I want to live without any worries, without having to struggle to survive.”
“……”
“I don’t want to face headwinds… I’m not a fighter. There hasn’t been a single moment when I was happy while enduring.”
Margo couldn’t say anything in front of her, as she endlessly cried and revealed her inner self.
She was born a princess of Herot and had been treated well her entire life. How could she perfectly understand Olivia’s struggles?
“…I’m sorry.”
At Margo’s words, Olivia smiled through her tears.
“Professor, I’m sorry. For acting impudently.”
Olivia quickly wiped her face, regretting her audacity towards the princess of Herot.
She couldn’t hide her reddened eyes and nose, but she still forced a smile and bowed her head.
“I’ll be going now.”
“Alright, go ahead.”
As Olivia picked up her bag and stood up, Margo quickly stopped her.
“Olivia.”
“Yes?”
“No one but you can judge your worth. You know that, right?”
“…Of course.”
“Come find me if you’re having a hard time.”
“Thank you.”
Olivia bowed her head more deeply than ever before, said her goodbyes, and left her office.
Then, she went to the garbage dump behind the faculty building and threw the lecture materials she had prepared over several months into the paper waste. Because they were useless now.
But as she turned to leave, Margo’s voice echoed in her ears.
“No one but you can judge your worth.”
“Ah, really…”
Olivia wiped her face as if to erase something, then turned back and retrieved the materials she had thrown into the trash can. She smoothed out the crumpled papers and put them back in her bag before leaving the school.
⚜ ⚜ ⚜
Small.
That was Noah’s first impression of her house.
The houses were so far apart that the concept of a village was vague, and Olivia’s house was even outside that vague concept. The only house nearby was said to be vacant.
“Um… it must be scary at night…”
Methone, who had begged and pleaded to follow the King, muttered as he glanced around, and the bodyguard nodded.
Noah swallowed a rising sigh and stepped into the small, humble house’s garden(?). Pulder-style houses didn’t have walls. Of course, the homes of the wealthy and high-ranking would have them.
The only thing worth seeing in this small, humble house was the wisteria flowers draped over the exterior walls.
The cascading flowers were nearing the end of their bloom, with the tips turning brown.
“Your Highness, there’s no telling how long we’ll have to wait. Shouldn’t we return to the hotel for now? One person can stay behind and wait, and when Miss Liberty arrives…”
“Troublesome.”
He dismissed the idea with a single word and strode towards a small chair in the shade of the wisteria.
He took out a handkerchief, roughly dusted off the chair, and sat down.
Frankly, it was the most uncomfortable chair he had ever sat on.
First of all, the chair was too low for his tall frame, and it was as hard as sitting on a rock. Eventually, he couldn’t bear the discomfort in his back and stood up.
Noah stared down at the most uncomfortable chair in the world. His cold gaze slowly flowed from the old stone steps connected to the chair to the gate and the stone wall.
The stuffy, tightly closed shutters in this heat, the old wooden door cracking with age, and the several locks hanging on it.
Just like Methone said, it must be scary at night.
“……”
Noah suddenly remembered that day.
The day he reached out to her, cornered by the thugs.
She looked at his hand as if asking what he wanted her to do, and Noah found it amusing.
What was she going to do if she didn’t take his hand now?
So he said very lightly.
Just take it.
Seeing the shabby house and the tightly closed fear, he was reminded of that day. What a bad bastard he was.
It was then.
“Oh? Your Highness! She’s coming, no, it looks like she’s coming?”
At Methone’s words, Noah turned around.
A woman was walking towards the desolate, humble house.
Olivia, riding in a multi-passenger carriage, sat in the very last seat, heading home. She blankly swayed with the movement of the carriage.
Then, when there was about a block left to her stop, a close-knit family boarded the carriage and sat across from her.
Olivia, who had been meaninglessly looking out the window, slowly turned her gaze to them.
It was a young girl, probably around seven years old, and a man and woman who seemed to be her parents. They sat the child in the middle.
They must have bought candy at the candy store, because the child held a bag of candy in her small, maple-leaf-like hand.
As she unwrapped a piece of candy and popped it into her mouth, her parents constantly checked her mouth, worried that she might swallow it whole, and the child smiled happily at the sweet taste.
Then, the child made eye contact with Olivia, who was watching her from across the way. Olivia smiled at her.
The child, who had been staring at Olivia while crunching on the candy, smiled back and took out a yellow candy from the bag and held it out to Olivia.
“Are you giving it to me?”
When Olivia asked with wide eyes, the child nodded with a smile. She glanced at her parents, who nodded with smiling faces as if to tell her to accept it, and Olivia carefully took the candy from the child.
“Thank you. I’ll enjoy it.”
At that moment, the coachman shouted loudly, “Fourth Street!” As the carriage came to a stop, Olivia nodded to the child and her parents before getting off the carriage.
After the carriage left, she was left alone, staring blankly at the yellow candy in her hand.
As she unwrapped the candy and put it in her mouth, it was very sweet.
But for some reason, tears welled up.
Olivia lowered her head with the candy in her mouth. She couldn’t lift her head until the small candy had completely melted away.
The sweet taste dredged up sweet memories and flowed bitterly down her throat.
“Liv, you have to eat carefully.”
“Is it good, my daughter?”
She missed the voices and laughter that sounded like hallucinations so much.
Olivia huddled up like a person crossing a harsh winter alone. Like someone walking through the freezing wind, she took a step and stopped, then took another step and stopped again.
Mom, Dad.
Why did you leave me alone in this cold place, why?
Status, gender, the money and honor in her hands.
Those things, which she couldn’t possibly control with her own strength, sometimes became heavy rain that fiercely soaked the small lamp standing alone, sometimes became a storm that pushed hard, and sometimes became lightning that struck down.
And Olivia endured all of it without an umbrella to shield her body.
Until now.
‘The chick breaks out of its egg with all its might. Only when it overcomes that does it face the complete world.’
‘Pain that cannot kill me makes me stronger.’
‘Kites rise high against the wind. Not with the wind.’
The famous quotes she had desperately clung to passed through her head ridiculously.
She couldn’t cling to anything, so she clung to those words. Just those words.
A deserted road, a road to a humble and small house.
Olivia covered her face with her hands and cried. Sadness washed over her, and tears poured out.
She took a step and stopped, then took another step and stopped again, just crying.
As if the world had collapsed.
As if the sky had poured down and the ground she stepped on had twisted.
And, it was then.
That he appeared.
It was when she was gasping for breath in the world that had collapsed around her, barely lifting her head.
“……”
Olivia stared blankly at him.
As the tears that had been shaking the world fell to her feet, she saw him through the clearer vision.
A man like the incarnation of royalty.
A person who seemed to personify the word perfection.
He who constantly made her feel small.
Noah Astrid.
He appeared as if in a lie, and held out his hand with a cold face.
“Everyone, move out of sight.”
“Yes?”
Methone, who had been excited at the thought of watching directly, suddenly looked distressed, but Noah was merciless.
“Don’t make me say it twice.”
“Understood.”
The Navy-trained bodyguards gave a sharp salute like soldiers and quickly disappeared, grabbing Methone by the scruff of the neck as he lingered with lingering regret.
Noah stood at attention in front of the mailbox that seemed to be the boundary line of the house.
He narrowed his eyes at the Pulder sunlight, which was so bright that it felt scattered, and watched the small silhouette approaching.
Since this was the only house in this deserted place, that small silhouette must be her.
She had been walking for a long time against the scorching sunlight on the old road with protruding stones.
It seemed that carriages didn’t come here either. How far did she have to walk to catch a carriage?
But for some reason, she was approaching very slowly, repeatedly stopping and walking.
Noah’s shallow patience was gradually running out.
What on earth was she doing, crouching down and walking like that? Like someone coming through a storm.
Then, when Olivia took a few more steps towards him, Noah realized that she was truly standing alone in the rain.
“……”
Wearing a white blouse and a light blue flared skirt, she hugged a rough leather bag and took a step, then buried her face in her hands, then took another step and wiped away tears.
As he was reminded of her wandering alone and crying like a déjà vu, Noah sighed deeply.
Was he only encountering her in moments like this, or was this woman always living through moments like this?
Noah looked at her with cold, hardened eyes and took a step, one step at a time, towards her. Towards her, who didn’t even know he was approaching.
