Chapter 165. Let's Get a Divorce
Olivia slept deeply, without even dreaming. When she woke up, the surroundings were pitch black.
As her eyes adjusted to the darkness, Olivia slowly sat up. The pain that washed over her made it very slow to get up.
Olivia lit a lamp to illuminate the room, then walked towards the bookshelves that densely lined the walls. Everything on the bookshelves was related to Olivia. Her diaries, textbooks, awards, essay collections, and so on.
The bookshelf had been in this spot even when her grandmother used it in her lifetime, and it had been full of her things.
Olivia took out a book at random.
It was a diary. She flipped through it and read a random page.
[…Today was so hard at school. Nicholas keeps making up lies and tormenting me.]
The girl’s anger could be felt in the tightly packed handwriting.
[Commoner girl, commoner girl! Kids like Nicholas seem to think my name is Commoner Girl. I was so angry that I asked them if they perhaps knew the meaning of the word republic.]
After flipping a few more pages, the emotion conveyed by the writing changed.
[I feel so good! My grades came out today, and I got first place! Nicholas, who used to look down on me and ignore me, couldn’t say a word. Teacher Neil called me over quietly and gave me a pen set as a gift. He told me to keep studying like this because I can become a great adult!]
Olivia slowly rolled a name she hadn't seen in a long time around her mouth, then pulled out a large stack of diaries and sat on the sofa.
As she turned each page and read, her own time seemed to flow back to that era.
Each and every page was the time of young Olivia.
Young Olivia lived fiercely. She never lived carelessly, not even for a moment.
Olivia turned another page, holding back tears that threatened to well up.
But there, written in a different hand, was a short message. Olivia leaned her head closer to the diary.
Seeing the elegant handwriting with its slightly upturned ends, Olivia stopped breathing.
[My dearest granddaughter, Olivia. I wanted to give you only the best, and this seemed like the best I could offer, so I came… but sometimes I wonder if this choice was the right one.]
Olivia’s eyes turned red at the words carefully written by her wrinkled grandmother.
[It’s very hard, isn’t it?]
Olivia covered her mouth. She felt like she was drowning in a flood of tears.
[I am always sorry. But I believe you will become a person who stands on her own. I believe you will become someone who has won the freedom to shape your life as you please. And I am always praying that you will become such a person.]
“Oh, Grandma…”
Olivia finally buried her face in the diary.
[I love you. From the beginning to the end of the universe. And… I am always, endlessly sorry.]
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry…”
I loved you too.
And…
Olivia couldn’t bear to stay there any longer, so she got up. She dressed haphazardly and went outside.
“Her Highness?!”
As she left the room and walked down the corridor, Betty rushed out from somewhere like an arrow. But Olivia was faster, opening the main door and stepping outside. Despite being unable to walk properly, she was that fast.
My grandmother is buried with my parents and grandfather, who were brought from Herot.
I have to see them.
With that single thought, she stepped out into the desolate courtyard, and there stood a person bathed in the faint moonlight. Olivia stopped walking and looked at him.
Brilliant golden hair like the moon illuminating the pitch-black night, eyes like beautiful jewels that couldn't be seen in the dark, a person I missed even while looking at him.
But holding the stake called love…
My cruel salvation, Noah.
‘I believe you will become someone who has won freedom.’
Tears carved a path and fell.
“Olivia.”
He, who had paused for a moment, approached in a single stride. And before she could react, he pulled her into an embrace.
Their bodies met, firm and hot, and the hands holding her back felt like an impregnable barrier, incomparable to anything in the world.
Was that why I loved him?
Tears continued to stream down. They seeped through her parted lips.
“Noah.”
“Yes.”
“I think…”
How irresponsible of me, to long for such a steadfast protection, like a barrier.
But,
‘I am always praying that you will become such a person.’
“I don’t think I can be the peace you wished for.”
She keenly felt his body stiffen against hers. Before she could hear his flustered voice in her ear, Olivia whispered.
“Let’s… get a divorce.”
⚜ ⚜ ⚜
It was a path run out of fear.
Noah couldn't possibly sit still, afraid of Olivia, who was pushing him away. After waking up, she had become a completely different person.
She didn't even try to look at him, nor did she smile.
“I love you.”
The moment she whispered her love felt like a fantasy.
So, late at night, like a madman, he left the mansion and drove aimlessly for a long time. And at the end of that long drive, he experienced the world collapsing once more.
“Let’s… get a divorce.”
Ansen Wilhelm’s curse-like words echoed in his mind.
It seemed she had no intention of forgiving him after all.
Olivia pushed away his frozen chest. Noah, pushed back by her meager strength, stared blankly at Olivia.
Even though she was gaunt and worn, she was beautiful.
Her dark eyes, filled with intelligence, her large, round eyes that curved downwards when she smiled, her moderately high nose, her red, full lips.
…But that wasn’t all.
Because you are you, since that autumn night, I…
“I promised His Majesty. If you help me regain the rights I lost, I will be responsible for constructing Herot’s independent Magic Dome.”
“Olivia.”
“The Magic Dome, in Duke Rosemond’s name…”
“Look at me.”
Olivia, who had been speaking while staring blankly into the darkness, slowly turned her head.
Her eyes, like a fragment of deep autumn, were blurred and messy. Yet, Olivia threw cruel words at him even as she looked at him.
“After all of that is over…”
“No.”
“Let’s get a divorce.”
“No.”
Something lukewarm trickled down his cheek, but Noah didn't notice. The wind blew, sharply lashing his hair, but he felt nothing.
“No, Liv.”
He was afraid that the woman who had become his world might no longer have love in her eyes.
Her hair was the sky and earth that cast a shadow over his world, her laughter was the water that kept him alive, and the love she whispered was the air that filled his world.
His cruel salvation finally averted her gaze from him and walked towards the darkness.
Noah quickly took a breath and followed her.
“Where are you going?”
“……”
Unable to bear it any longer, Noah embraced Olivia, who was walking towards the cold darkness, from behind.
“Liv, please…”
“Let me go. I… I’m going to see Grandma.”
“Let’s go together. Wherever you go, whatever you do, I won’t tell you not to. Instead, I’ll go with you. No, let me go with you.”
Noah released his arms and clasped Olivia’s cold hand.
Olivia gazed down at his large hand.
His hand, which had felt stronger than anything in the world, was trembling ever so slightly.
Grandmother’s resting place was a communal cemetery owned by a small church on the outskirts of Pulder. My parents and grandfather, whose remains were brought from Herot, were also buried there.
The priest on duty at the church calmly welcomed the late-night visitors. He seemed to have completely severed ties with the secular world and did not recognize Olivia and Noah. After all, who would expect the Prince and Princess of Herot to arrive at this hour?
The communal cemetery was located on a gentle hill behind the church.
There were lanterns placed here and there, but they were barely effective. Fortunately, it was a bright moonlit night, so the cemetery was clearly visible.
Noah was restless, worried Olivia might collapse.
However, the still-recovering Olivia possessed a strange strength. She moved slowly but without rest.
For some reason, her appearance was poignant.
“Can we stop by Lorwell?”
What were you thinking when you made me that offer?
“Do we really have to stop there? There’s not much to see.”
When you heard my answer, what were you feeling?
Finally, she stopped in front of a flat tombstone. Noah’s gaze drifted downwards.
On the tombstone, laid flat on the ground, four names were engraved vertically.
Hemil Max. James Max. Sylvia Max. Susanna Liberty.
Susanna’s name alone was carved with a different depth, as if added last.
Noah’s gaze slid down below the names. Below the names, these words were engraved.
I love you, Olivia.
It must have been her grandmother’s consideration, fearing her granddaughter would be upset.
Olivia gazed at the tombstone for a long time before slowly sinking down. She knelt on the cold ground and leaned her upper body over the tombstone. Then, she lay face down and quietly embraced the tombstone.
It seemed around this time that her parents had also passed away.
Somewhere between winter and spring.
Olivia pressed her cheek against the tombstone and whispered.
“Mom, Dad, Grandpa, Grandma. I’m here.”
Even though you are no longer here, still… I’m here.
⚜ ⚜ ⚜
Noah was not the Noah that Margo knew.
His demeanor and actions were no different. The etiquette ingrained in him as naturally as breathing made him appear so.
Nevertheless, he seemed to be standing on the edge of a cliff. Or like a faded autumn leaf clinging precariously to the tip of a dry branch.
He declined dinner and shut himself in his room. Then, late at night, past midnight, he suddenly stormed out of the mansion.
Margo, startled, rushed out, but Noah had already vanished, not even a shadow remaining.
Where would he have gone?
After Noah disappeared, Margo couldn't sleep.
For a long time, she paced her room, listening to the sounds of the silent darkness, when a faint light crept in without a sound.
It was a particularly pale dawn, and just as Margo stopped her weary steps and gasped for breath.
The heavy door of the mansion opened with a sound.
Margo ran to the window in a single stride. And when she looked outside, she couldn't help but sigh.
“Ah…”
Margo’s eyes flickered. Even from a distance, she could feel that Noah Astrid was merely a shell of his former self.
Margo ran down the corridor without even thinking of fastening her robe. When she reached the grand staircase and then the entrance hall, Noah was standing there blankly.
“Noah.”
“……”
“Noah…”
“……”
His eyes, which had been proud and firm with a weary pride, had lost their light, and his broad, seemingly always strong shoulders looked merely empty, like the vast tombs of Eastern kings.
