8 - Pieces of the Broken Glass Slipper
Shattered Glass Slipper Shards Episode 8
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The tea, holding the faint hue of the setting sun, gently swirled within the teacup. A sweet aroma tickled the tip of my nose. Taking a sip, a surprisingly sweet and smooth flavor coated my tongue. It seemed like even someone who didn't particularly like tea could enjoy it.
“Sissae, I’m sorry about earlier.”
At that moment, Roena spoke to me in a small voice. She was whimpering like a puppy watching its owner, her expression sensitive to my every reaction.
“No, it’s fine. I’m just grateful you sent a maid. You must have been very sad. Are you alright?”
As I asked casually, pretending not to know, Roena’s complexion darkened rapidly. She wore a very melancholic expression and lowered her gaze.
“No. I’m fine, really.”
“But you still don’t look well? Shall I send her back? Marie is a bit unreliable, but if it means you can smile, then it’s fine.”
“No. I’m truly fine. More importantly, Seril is a really good maid; she’ll take good care of you.”
“Then please don’t make that face as if you’re trying to show me something. I genuinely don’t know if you’re okay.”
At my words, Roena’s face flushed crimson.
“What face?”
“The face that shows regret, that you still have lingering feelings. That’s how you look right now. You’re making the other person worry.”
Without looking in a mirror, she wouldn’t know what her face looked like. However, since the other person claimed it, she had no choice but to accept it.
My mother’s bewildered gaze, watching us, was merely an accessory.
Roena raised her hand and touched her cheek. Then, she attempted a smile, however awkward. I added a word, as if praising her effort.
“Yes, smile that brightly. If only to prove the sincerity of your words.”
There was probably no situation more ridiculous than this.
In truth, a smile holds greater power than a hundred words. It is softer than water and sharper than a sword. It is sturdier than a shield and even more steadfast than a castle.
Furthermore, it contains more stories than the pen of an author, and possesses a spirit greater than tens of thousands of soldiers. Most importantly, all spears and malice aimed at an opponent could be hidden within this single action. Ah, what a fearsome and enchanting weapon it is!
In the past, I didn’t know how powerful a weapon ‘laughter’ could be. I merely reacted to Roena’s every move, revealing my hatred for her completely. Unbeknownst to me, it would become a monster that consumed me.
Yes, I admit it. In the past, I was a child. A foolish one who self-destructed out of inability to control my own anger.
I had prided myself on possessing talent comparable to Roena’s and was confident I could surpass her, but in reality, I was an imbecile who couldn’t even measure up to her afterthoughts.
What good is accumulating knowledge if one’s actions are like a frog in a well? A foolish woman, rustic and simple-minded like a village bumpkin, believing her narrow perspective was the entirety of the world.
Therefore, I didn’t know. The smiles the noble ladies cast my way! The meaning behind the fanning of their fans! The true intent behind the words that flowed from their beautiful lips! I didn’t even realize how much malice and mockery were contained in every situation and word given to me.
I had strutted about, full of pride as if I were a member of that world, without knowing my place. I had been unable to hide my joy, thinking their smiles were a sign of welcome.
Truly foolish. Stupid. Ignorant. A fledgling, disguised as a doe, had danced a dance of self-destruction on a gradually heating grill, exposing herself completely to the predators wearing the guise of nobility.
She had set herself ablaze to provide great amusement for others. So, hahaha, what a ridiculous thing!
It was the limitation of my narrow vision. It was my own fatal flaw, which I couldn't see with eyes stained by jealousy.
Tears of goodwill are not the only weapons; I was completely unaware of this. Sadly, so unaware. But what about now, having returned?
As the subtle atmosphere surrounding Roena continued, my mother’s complexion turned pale. Her beautiful eyes, cast in deep shadow, were filled with worry for me.
I knew what my mother feared. So frail and delicate, yet still beautiful, she was anxious that I might fall out of favor with my adoptive father.
The Count of Bishbalz loved my mother, not Sissae the person. That’s why she was worried that my rude words from earlier might reach his ears through the maids. Isn’t it natural for family to stick together?
But Mother, do you know that passion, under the name of love, sometimes surpasses the bonds of blood?
My adoptive father was astonishingly loyal to my mother until the day he died. He was so frail and prone to emotional swings that he always tried to appease my mother’s moods.
Sometimes, he was so overly enthusiastic that he overlooked my behavior, which was as erratic as a startled colt. So, why should I be afraid? Knowing that he wouldn’t punish me for words like these!
My adoptive father, blinded by love, would surely dismiss it as me merely not having shed my old habits. Therefore, there was no reason to cower.
But Mother still seemed uneasy about all this. That’s why she was speaking to me like this.
“Sissae.”
“Yes, please speak.”
“Now that you are a member of the Bishbalz family, you must be cautious with every word you utter.”
Although the title of Duke had been lost by the previous generation, my mother had learned etiquette, albeit at a rudimentary level, from her own mother, my grandmother.
Compared to other noble ladies, her level was quite low, but it wasn’t so much that she couldn’t adapt to this world at all. The fact that she met my adoptive father and was able to promise marriage was greatly aided by the charmingly clumsy etiquette she had learned in the past.
Through this, she had managed to step into high society, and thus, she must have caught a glimpse of the beautiful yet cruel world’s underside. Since the most important thing to be careful of there is one’s ‘tongue,’ she was worried about my tone, which was about to debut.
“I’m sorry. Mother, you are right. Roena, I hope you can forgive me if you were offended.”
“No, not at all.”
I reached out and took Roena’s hand. Interlocking my fingers with her long ones, I tried my best to maintain the smile on my lips.
“Thank you so much for understanding.”
“No, it’s me who should thank you.”
“Can you continue to understand me even if I make mistakes in the future? I’m still clumsy at everything compared to you.”
“Huh?”
“Is it a difficult request?”
“Oh, no. It’s not. Oh, yes. Of course.”
I was very satisfied with her words. Even though she sensed something strange, her inability to properly refuse in front of others made her look comically pathetic. I felt a thirst for it, a thrill.
At the same time, I was curious. When she realized her greatest weapon was actually the ‘evil’ that would destroy her, what kind of expression would she show?
The malice that continued from the past was consuming my body, plunging me into endless darkness. The intense murderous intent towards Roena was twisting and controlling the persona of Sissae. I felt like a marionette tied by strings.
However, this situation didn’t feel bad to me. What others would abhor and fear was like nectar to me.
Yes, if I’m going to fall, I’ll go to the very bottom of hell. What is there to fear when I’ve returned from death? I am already a foolish soul intoxicated by the sweetness of defeating Roena, of dragging her down to the abyss I once tasted. I was an imbecile, blinded and deafened.
But what does it matter? If I could see her contorted face, I would sell my soul to the devil.
Therefore, the ‘someone’ who returned me to the ‘present’ must regret it deeply. What is repentance but a weak heart? Don’t make me laugh. I don’t need such a feeble sentiment. I am still Cis de Bishbalz, gasping with inferiority towards Roena!
My mother tilted her head at my subtly twisted words, but she seemed unable to find anything specific to point out.
So, she would only say something like, ‘Please don’t trouble Roena too much.’ I nodded and replied with deliberate cheerfulness.
“Of course. We are sisters, after all.”
At my words, Roena blushed. Her plump cheeks were softly covered in a light, peachy hue. Her shyly lowered eyelashes were long enough to elicit a gasp. She truly smiled like an angel. Damn it.
“But please don’t trouble me too much.”
“That’s a difficult promise to make. But I promise I will try. Even if it takes a very long time to look like you.”
“No, it won’t take that long, will it? Because it didn’t for me. So I think it will be the same for Sissae.”
Yes. For you, who grasps ten things when taught one, what would be difficult? With innate talent as a foundation, everything must seem easy. So, how should I express this ‘arrogance’?
“Well? Please don’t think everyone has the same talent as you. It’s a little upsetting. Ah, I wish I were you. Then I could learn easily without trying…”
So, let’s begin now. A delightful concerto between one who realizes their shortcomings and strives desperately, and one who relies on innate talent and doesn’t try.
In truth, I am a person no less kind and considerate than anyone else. I know how to speak kindly to others, and I am a woman who can willingly offer goodwill to those in need. Or rather, I thought I could. Until one being twisted me.
Yes, it’s all because of the girl smiling in front of me now, Roena Bishbalz. Because of you, who stares with innocent eyes as if nothing is wrong. Only you and the maids you command are the recipients of my malice.
So, I anticipated. How much of a breakdown she would show after my words from earlier.
However, there were no tears. There were no eyes widened in shock, nor lips pale and trembling with fear.
Instead, I almost screamed at her smile towards me. After such blatant sarcasm, one would expect her to feel some disconnect, but Roena was accepting it all as genuine ‘praise.’ The concerto I played was the height of dissonance. All instruments creaked, singing only of ‘despair.’
“It’s embarrassing that you see me that way. But Sissae, please don’t think too little of yourself. If you try, won’t things work out somehow?”
I put on a bewildered expression. I gently lowered my gaze at the maids watching me and Roena. Clenching my teeth so hard they felt like they would grind to dust, I blushed shyly, as if I couldn’t be more embarrassed.
“Yes. I’ll try to do that.”
Now, my mother’s maids were watching a ‘comedy’ of an adoptive sister, whose etiquette was clumsy and words were careless but held no ‘malice,’ and an adoptive sister who understood her heart and generously embraced her.
A scene that, wrapped in the hollow name of family, was not even remotely funny, and therefore felt extremely unsightly. How disgusting. How nauseating, to the point of vomiting.
But thanks to this, I can cover up future mistakes with ‘she’s just not used to this life yet.’ In other words, until my etiquette reaches a certain level in noble society, I can feign ignorance and attack her.
So, let’s feel relieved. Let’s console ourselves that this is better. Otherwise, I’d explode and die first. No, I should actually be happy. About her actions, which trust me implicitly.
