31 - Not Your Son, But Your Father
Chapter 31
Edith's reaction wasn't great either.
"Who was the bastard measuring me for a coffin?"
"Oh dear. It's just that we all want to serve the Star Lord like our own parents."
The Count was quite unique. For one, he wasn't terrified of Edith.
The Count, without hesitation, turned away from Edith, who was questioning his sins, and bowed to me with courtesy.
"I greet the Grand Duchess, the light and treasure of the Calakis family, whose nobility is in no way inferior to the heavens where the Star Lord resides. I am one who has sworn to dedicate my life to the Calakis Grand Duchy. Please, feel free to use me as you wish. Hehe..."
Why the 'hehe' laugh? He looks normal, but his mental state is a bit off.
The Count was looking at me with sparkling eyes, as if he would prostrate himself at any moment.
Aside from him seeming crazy, it felt too easy to become the light and treasure of the Calakis family just because I made Edith come all the way to the capital.
Anyway, I said what I had to say.
"Nice to meet you, Count. I look forward to working with you, and please take the cats out."
The Count opened his mouth.
"You are too harsh, Grand Duchess!"
Well, I didn't expect him to listen obediently. Anyone who decorates someone else's house as they please is no ordinary crazy person.
"Are you saying that already? I haven't even started being harsh yet."
With Edith by my side, I had nothing to fear.
And the Count was in very bad shape.
He collapsed on the spot and started wailing. A man with a slick beard and mustache sobbing on the floor was, frankly, very pathetic.
"The Spirits are like my alter egos! If you're going to banish them, banish me!"
S-Spirits...?
"Of course, that's the plan."
I said as naturally as possible. I almost stuttered.
"Heo."
The Count turned his eyes to Edith. Edith threw him just one word, seeking help.
"Are you still not lowering your eyes?"
The Count suffered from a disease that made him unable to distinguish between Spirits and cats, but he was quick to grasp the situation.
"...The only one I can trust is the Grand Duchess! Light of the Calakis family! Treasure! Salt! Dreams and hopes of growing children..."
"Stop."
Just do one verse, you crazy bastard.
My head ached, but it wasn't entirely unproductive. The Count genuinely cherished the cats.
But, you know.
"Why do you insist on keeping the cats in the Ducal Palace instead of the Count's residence?"
The Count prostrated himself and answered.
"The Spirits said they are more comfortable here."
"Did they speak to you directly?"
"I can tell even if they don't speak..., please spare me!"
As I was about to issue an expulsion order, my patience reaching its limit, the Count shouted urgently.
"The Spirits are bringing good fortune to the castle!"
"The Calakis family is great even without such good fortune."
"W-Well, that's true, but..."
The Count, at a loss for words, shrank for a moment. He glanced at me, then asked in a small voice.
"Perhaps, is there a specific reason why the Grand Duchess cannot be near cats?"
"..."
I had a cat allergy in my previous life.
The symptoms weren't severe, but my nose would run constantly if I was in the same space as a cat.
The Count, interpreting my silence differently, apologized.
"I asked an impertinent question. Please forgive me. However, would you please reconsider, valuing my loyalty?"
The Count seemed to firmly believe that the cats were Spirits that brought good fortune.
I leaned back in my chair.
"Then let's make a deal."
"I will come and live in the Ducal Palace!"
Smiling brightly at the nonsense, I called my temporary escort knights.
"Lord Vega, Lord Procyon, please escort the Count out. Make him walk barefoot to clear his head. No, just tear off all his clothes."
"I'm sorry! I was wrong!"
The Count begged until his hands were worn out.
Edith, is this really the only talent you could find in the North...?
I swallowed a sigh and pressed my temples.
Rigen seemed to like the cats too, and they seemed to have completely blended into Cyclamen Castle, so I wasn't really thinking of kicking them out.
And my cat allergy was only a problem in my previous life, not now.
Also, the Count was probably competent. Yeah, he would have died a long time ago if he couldn't manage the territory.
He was proving his usefulness by still being alive.
"Grand Duchess, please have mercy. I will do anything to gain your trust."
"Would it be okay if there are many requirements?"
"Just give me your orders."
I said immediately.
"Then, first, remove all the cat-themed items scattered throughout the castle. Cat-shaped doorknobs, cat statues, cheese-colored carpets, and so on. However, you can leave the cat supplies as they are."
"Y-Yes..."
"Second... Edith, is there anything you want?"
"Nothing except killing him."
At the chilling reply, the Count appealed with tears.
"Grand Duchess! I, Tolliman Elliot, pride myself on having lived a truly kind and innocent life. I have served the Star Lord since before I even inherited my title. How could I have enjoyed such glory unless I was thoroughly clean, without even a speck of dust?"
No wonder he didn't faint even after making eye contact with Edith; they had a long relationship. But the claim of being clean without dust was hard to believe.
First, try hiding that skin of yours, which looks like you've been lounging at a resort every summer.
His evenly tanned skin was glossy as if oiled. It couldn't have been from anything other than constant leisure.
Wait, could the Count be one of Edith's close aides?
N-No way. That can't be.
I denied reality. I didn't want to meet the Count often, not even a little bit.
Managing my rotting expression, I asked before making the second request.
"I heard that the Count has been acting as the territory manager. What's the situation?"
"It's running moderately well. There are also moderately greedy bastards. Of course, I've mercilessly cut off those who cross the line."
Really mercilessly cut off?
I looked at Edith to confirm. He explained briefly.
"Even though he looks like that, he's a guy who killed his own parents."
Wait, didn't he say earlier that he wanted to serve Edith like his parents?
As if reading my thoughts, Edith added.
"He's scheduled to die by my hand soon."
So, he wasn't a close aide after all.
Hmm, um, that's a relief.
I returned to the main topic.
"The dismissed vassals must be grinding their teeth behind your back."
The Count, who had been listening to the conversation between Edith and me as if it were someone else's business, smiled with narrowed eyes.
"Hehe. Well, no one dares to voice their dissatisfaction. When the Grand Duchess returns after completing the traditional ceremony, I will gather the accounting books, territory management reports, and civil complaints to show you."
Huh? Traditional ceremony?
I'll have to ask Edith about it later.
"If you allow it, I would like to continue reporting to the Grand Duchess in the future. The Grand Duchess is different from the Star Lord, isn't she? If I stay up for days and nights to sincerely organize the documents, you will look at them, right? Ah, no, I absolutely don't mean to burden you! I'm not asking for much! Just look at them for even 10 seconds! At least count how many pages there are!"
The Count raised his voice tone as if suddenly overcome with sorrow.
The Count was just happy to have a superior who would properly review his reports. But.
My head tilted.
"Reviewing documents isn't difficult, but is it okay to trust me so soon?"
Then Tolliman Elliot said solemnly.
"The Grand Duchess is already a hero who has saved the North."
* * *
The Count, beaten by Edith until he was just short of death, ran away, and only Edith and I were left in the room.
Ugh, I'm exhausted.
But that Tolliman Elliot guy didn't seem ordinary.
Of course, his mental state too, but he walked away perfectly fine even after being kicked by Edith. It wasn't just a 'thud' sound, it was a 'thwack' sound.
The fact that he killed his own parents isn't something to just gloss over either.
However, compared to his unusual appearance, the name Tolliman Elliot had never been mentioned directly or indirectly in the novel.
The only guess I could make was that he might be one of Edith's close aides, appearing as rarely as a bean in a drought.
It would be sad if it was true, and complicated if it wasn't.
In the end, I couldn't even say the second requirement. At least the goal was achieved just by removing the cat-related decorations.
Ugh, my head feels like it's breaking.
Just thinking about Count Elliot had the ability to make people's heads ache.
I sighed so much that I felt like my soul was leaving my body. L-Let's stop thinking about it. There are many other problems right now.
"Edith, what is this traditional ceremony?"
I asked, tapping the table with my finger.
Edith said with a bit of guilt.
"I should have explained it to you first, I'm sorry. It's been so long since the Calakis family had a Grand Duchess that I forgot about it."
He pointed to the snowy window.
"The ceremony itself is simple. On a moonless night, the Grand Duchess goes to the First Bell Tower, which is no longer in use, and asks the Spirit for blessings. You can also make a wish."
I tilted my head.
"There's a Spirit?"
