Ch#144
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How many times had she witnessed a person break down? Not many, as far as her memory served. In Adi’s world, watching someone retch or scream profanities was a common occurrence, while tears were a rarity. That was simply the reality of life among the martial orders. Once in a while, a young page might weep out of sheer desperation, but those outbursts bore no resemblance to the scene before her now.
Adi started to reach out, then hesitated and pulled her hand back.
“……”
She was at a total loss on how to manage a person in the throes of grief.
The knight simply stood there, fixated on Yvette Grimaldi. Watching the silent tracks of moisture skip down the woman’s cheeks left her paralyzed with uncertainty. Eventually, Yvette began to scrub at her face, her movements frantic as if she were humiliated by her own vulnerability.
In that frantic gesture, Adi caught a glimpse of her own reflection. It wasn’t as if Yvette had raised her, after all. The same was true for Adrian; a nurse had been the one to nurture him. Adi had always assumed they shared nothing in common. She had convinced herself that family traits were merely products of shared environments and learned habits, yet it appeared that blood carried certain echoes even across a lifetime of separation. The realization made her feel strangely detached.
Nearby, the domestic staff stared at Adi as if she were a heartless savage. Their judgmental expressions seemed to demand why she wasn’t offering any solace. Adrina wondered if basic empathy was just another skill she was expected to study.
She did have a recent point of reference, however. When she had broken down, Yuls had simply pulled her into a cloak of his own arms. Was that the standard protocol for comforting the distressed? Was it a universal human response, or was it merely a quirk of the Woodpecker household?
……It didn’t truly matter. The gesture had provided her with a sense of peace, and she assumed most people functioned in a similar fashion.
Deciding there was no point in overthinking, Adi climbed onto the mattress. Yvette recoiled, her posture stiffening as if she anticipated an assault. As the woman tried to retreat, Adi caught her by the arm and hauled her closer. Yvette attempted to shove her away, but the physical gap between a delicate noblewoman and a seasoned warrior was insurmountable. A small gasp escaped Yvette’s lips as Adi firmly locked her in an embrace.
For a moment, Yvette seemed to stop breathing entirely. She went rigid, her eyes darting around in confusion as she tried to process the contact, before she was suddenly seized by a fit of hiccups. Adi began to rhythmically pat her on the back. The spasms eventually faded, and Yvette finally went limp, resting against her.
Adrina realized she was significantly larger than the other woman. She was also radiating heat. She felt like a person who was truly alive.
No, she was undeniably alive.
After a few moments of stillness, Yvette gently pushed her away. Adi let her arms drop and stepped back.
“What was that for?” Yvette demanded.
“It’s what was done for me when I was crying,” Adi explained simply.
“……By whom?”
Adi wasn’t certain of the social etiquette, but she sensed that naming Yuls would be a mistake, so she remained silent. She tilted her head, looking at Yvette with genuine confusion.
“Did I do it wrong?”
Yvette’s expression twisted with emotion before she bowed her head. Adi watched as the woman collapsed into herself, hiding her face behind her palms. She was likely weeping again, though the catalyst remained a mystery. Nothing Adi had said seemed particularly provocative.
Then again, Adi had found herself crying for no apparent reason lately. It had happened at Adrian’s resting place and again after her encounter with the Count.
She hadn’t understood her own tears in those moments. Perhaps Yvette was experiencing the same confusion.
Or maybe there was a deep-seated reason that simply hadn’t surfaced yet. Adi exhaled slowly. She had come looking for a straightforward answer, but all she had received was a heavy silence punctuated by falling tears. She wondered how much longer she was expected to wait.
*
Fortunately, Adrina reappeared exactly as her duties were set to begin. Yuls had been putting on a brave face, but the visible tension left him the moment she walked through the door.
Even so, her silent disappearance deserved a reprimand. He had no desire to chain her down, but this felt excessive. He wondered if this level of emotional turbulence was just a natural side effect of having feelings for someone.
“Sir.”
Dimitri stepped toward Adrina, his face also reflecting a sense of relief. It seemed the entire group had been nursing a quiet terror that she had met with some disaster.
Roy, however, didn’t share that concern. He remembered her reputation as the Dog of Pallesa Palace far too well. She was the one who handed out injuries, not the one who received them.
“Where did you disappear to?”
“I had a question for Countess Yvette Grimaldi, so I paid her a visit,” Adi replied.
The room went still, everyone wearing looks of utter bewilderment. No one had even considered Yvette as a possibility, mostly because the relationship between the two was famously strained.
Then again, Yvette had mentioned wanting a word with Adrina previously. And Adrina had likely heard rumors of the Duke’s peril before making the trip, carrying that pouch of dried berries.
It was perfectly logical in hindsight. They just hadn’t seen it coming.
“Did you find what you were looking for?” Yuls inquired.
Dimitri tried to intervene, murmuring “Your Excellency” as if to suggest they should move on, but Adrina answered anyway.
“No, I didn’t.”
“Is that so?” Yuls said, his voice dancing with a hint of a tease. “Then how did my knight spend all that time?”
“I held her.”
A heavy silence smothered the room. Everyone was dying to know the details of that interaction, yet no one had the nerve to press her. Adrina looked around at them, her expression asking if she had committed some breach of protocol.
“You… embraced the Countess?”
Dimitri was the first to find his voice, though it was strained with skepticism. Adi gave a firm nod.
“She was in tears, so I gave her a hug.”
“Simply because she was crying?”
“Yes. Your Excellency did the same for me when I was upset.”
Dimitri’s gaze shot to Yuls. Roy followed suit. Under the weight of their questioning stares—demanding to know exactly when this intimacy had occurred—Yuls slowly closed his eyes and took a breath.
“Is that not the proper way to provide comfort?”
“It is,” Yuls muttered, covering his face with his hand.
In his younger form, the gesture made him look unexpectedly endearing. Dimitri kept his eyes fixed on his master. He was about to demand a timeline of events when the memory of that specific moment finally clicked. Shaking his head in private exasperation, the chamberlain began to clear the tea service to give the Duke some breathing room.
“Why is everyone acting so strange?” Adi asked.
“……It’s nothing,” Dimitri replied.
The chamberlain privately noted that Yuls still had a mountain of challenges ahead of him.
Regardless, the crisis had passed. Adi was back. With the help of the staff Claude had left behind, the Woodpecker party was making steady progress on their travel arrangements. Security was being tightened, though they were avoiding using any of the Count’s local retainers.
“We leave for the south in forty-eight hours. We’ll head east to Sachya and secure a vessel. The sea route will save us significant time.”
“Utilizing the currents, then.”
“Have you ever traveled by water?”
“Never.”
“Motion sickness might be an issue. If you feel ill, Joel can provide a tincture.”
“I understand, Your Excellency.”
“That leaves us with one full day. We move out at dawn the day after tomorrow.”
“Understood,” Adi confirmed.
Yuls’s gaze shifted to Roy, who was still lingering by the entrance. “Roy, you’re dismissed as well.”
“Actually, Sir—” Roy started to leave, then paused. “Yes, Your Excellency?”
“No, I was speaking to Adrina.”
Roy’s face went awkward as he turned to leave again, nearly colliding with Dimitri as the chamberlain set down a fresh pot of tea.
“What were you going to say earlier?” Yuls asked.
Adi looked blank, clearly having lost the thread of their previous conversation. Yuls prompted her further. “The thing you were about to mention before Dimitri interrupted us.”
“Oh.”
As Roy held the door halfway open and Dimitri prepared to pour the tea, Adi spoke with total clarity.
“I was going to say that I have feelings for Your Excellency.”
The world seemed to stop. Roy froze with his hand on the latch, Dimitri stood paralyzed with the teapot mid-air, and Yuls remained motionless in his chair.
Her bluntness was one thing, but Adrina’s timing was entirely chaotic. If Claude was difficult to read because of his calculated mask, Adrina was simply born as an enigma.
Yuls buried his face in his palms once more. He could feel the heat radiating from his ears. He felt a profound sense of injustice that he had to receive such a confession while trapped in the body of a child.