20 - Never Let Go of a Black-Haired Dad

Chapter 20 - If You're Not Going to Date a Hundred Lovers, Don't Go Around Calling Yourself a Delinquent (8)

Translator: Note

Episode 20

I am very twisted right now.

Ever since Beomgol declared he would change my education supervisor, I'd been tricked by the Head Maid and Marshmallow for a whole week and ended up diligently attending classes. That's why my body and mind are twisted.

To express this, I put a toy pipe in my mouth and blew, "Hoo, hoo," during teatime with Beomgol.

Choco burst into laughter at my appearance, but I didn't particularly blame him. Right now, I was angrier at Beomgol than at Choco.

"The weather is nice."

"If you keep pretending not to notice, Her Highness might really get upset, I tell you."

"The tea is delicious."

"That bastard, he's doing that on purpose, isn't he, I tell you."

You're bad too, Choco, you little shit! You have no intention of mediating, just narrating the situation!

I boasted my five-year-old lung capacity, blew the pipe so hard the ball completely flew off, and stuck the cigarette between my fingers.

"Did you learn that delinquent behavior from Lorowi again?"

Beomgol said something, but the only people who had ever smoked in front of me were my mom and Beomgol.

"I learned it from you! You, you! You little shit!"

"I only showed you once back then. Logically, it would be Lorowi."

"Umm, Momma! Pipe!"

Beomgol, you smoke paper-filtered cigarettes! My mom smokes a pipe!

Isn't it obvious that the way they smoke is different!

As I logically asserted this, Beomgol narrowed his brow and turned a page of the book he was reading.

"Don't learn it, it's not good."

"If you know, Beomgol, you quit too."

"I'm an adult, so it's okay."

"You're an adult, so it's okay? You, you should be a role model."

"Enough."

No, I haven't even started yet, why are you telling me to stop out of the blue? Annoyed, I kicked Beomgol's knee with my short legs, and Choco burst into laughter.

"What did you want to see me about?"

"Is it formality? Abba and daughter. Do I need a reason to see you?"

"I see. So, you don't have a reason?"

"I don't want to study. Skip class."

"It's only two hours a day. I'm giving you enough rest time."

"I don't want to. I don't want to study."

"How do you plan to rule the country without learning?"

"I won't be emperor."

"I have to pass the throne to you when you come of age."

Is that all you were worried about? Silly Beomgol. I know a very simple solution.

I cleared my throat and seriously pointed at myself with both hands.

"Give it to someone else."

"Okay."

Then I pointed at Beomgol.

"Ruin it."

"Hoo."

How about that? Isn't it a brilliant strategy?

I came up with it myself, but I was so proud that I shrugged my shoulders. Beomgol picked up two cookies and ate them, then asked me a question.

"How can you ruin a country?"

"Like a moron, falling into debauchery."

"I have no interest in drugs, alcohol, or women."

"Th, then men...?"

"I have no interest in men either. How did Lorowi raise you?"

Ah, don't you have any desires as a human being?

Since you were born into a ducal family, you've never been short on money. For the same reason, you don't know the taste of power. Our country has a well-established bureaucratic system, so unless you're a complete moron who screws up for 20 years straight, the foundation won't collapse.

Then, what's worth considering...

"A war of conquest, or something?"

"War, huh."

"That's right. If you don't have the skills to handle it, and the emperor only looks outward, it will collapse within 10 years."

Wow, I'm really giving you a pro tip on how to ruin a country. I saw this in a history book recorded before the common language of the underworld was created.

The translator is Kysomallows, so you won't be able to find it anywhere except the imperial secret archives.

The book recorded the rise and fall of a nomadic people who had unified half the continent. They recklessly expanded their territory and started wars of conquest, only to disappear without a trace within 10 years.

As I told the story in a careful tone, Beomgol looked at me with an interested expression and said,

"You seem very interested in war."

"Huh? Well, not really."

"I heard you called the Brigitte Count's family sisters and talked about conquering Loruruje Fortress."

Beomgol, you must have met that stage maniac and the history scholar girl.

Well, the moron brought them to the palace with the intention of seducing them, so he must have met them when he told them to go home.

"Not really. I couldn't talk for long."

"If one hour isn't long, then you can endure two hours of class, right?"

This Beomgol bastard, he's so impeccably airtight! If I say this, he counters with that! If I say that, he blocks with this!

Let me live, you little shit!

"Considering your aptitude, I will add military science to your imperial studies. Is that okay?"

"Okay? Are you crazy!"

"Since we have some time today, let's play together."

"You only say what you want to hear, you crazy bastard! Crazy!"

Beomgol, who only heard what he wanted to hear from my words, slammed the book he was reading on the table.

I wondered what kind of book he was reading while elegantly enjoying teatime, but the cover of the book was titled 'Good Parenting Guidelines for Children's Emotional Development.'

"Hiyah..."

Beomgol, you're really something else.

Are you going to do what you saw in the book now? Are you going to play with me for my emotional development?

"I heard from the Brigitte sisters that you like playing house."

"Well, I wouldn't say I like it that much..."

"What should I do?"

Isn't this game just something you want to do?

Thanks to Beomgol's overwhelming enthusiasm, I called Emily and told the palace maids how to act as props, and we took turns assigning roles.

"I'm Abba. Beomgol is Momma. Choco is the daughter."

"Not the son, but the daughter, you say?"

"Uh-huh."

"Hmm... I understand, I tell you."

Since it's come to this, it would be good for you to taste my feelings that day. The second daughter suddenly got angry at me and threw her coat, it was so scary.

I pressed the maid's belly and went into the house with a "ding-dong" and threw everything I was holding. After shouting "Hey!" at Beomgol, who was elegantly enjoying teatime, I screamed like the second daughter did.

"This woman! Your husband comes home and you don't even come out to greet him!"

"..."

Hehe. How about that? Surprised?

I was even about to pretend to overturn the tea table, but Beomgol frowned and tapped the seat opposite him with his finger.

"Sit down."

"Why should I sit down! There's not a single warm person in this house!"

"Husbands and wives are equal. I am not your servant, so why should I come out to greet you?"

"Uh, uh..."

This Beomgol is spouting logic again.

What should I do? It's a bit different from what I imagined.

"I'm the one who earns the money..."

"Are you going to be superior because you are the subject of economic activity through labor? I am also working. From hiring servants to paying taxes so that you can live a comfortable life when you return. The household cannot function without me."

"Uh, still... it's a home, there should be some warmth..."

"If you want to be unconditionally loved, you can live with your parents or raise a dog."

Hey! Then why did you marry me! If you married me because you loved me, you can at least expect some affection, right?!

"If you're not going to love me, why did you marry me! You should have raised a dog instead of catching me!"

"Marriage is also a kind of contract. You can do it for a purpose even without love."

"Eeeek!"

Ah! Let's break up, let's break up! I wanted someone to love and cherish for the rest of my life, not a machine to take care of the household!

I was full of anger and told the story clearly, and Choco, who had been silent until now, appeared with a ferocious face.

"That's great. Then I'll take Father."

"This guy, he finally revealed his teeth."

"I had my eye on this person first. You're the one who stole him in the middle, Mother."

"How can there be such a parricide in the world. That person is your father."

"Even though we don't share a drop of blood!"

What's wrong with Choco, he drew his sword.

Choco drew his sword at an invisible speed, and Beomgol threw the chair he was about to sit on. The terrace chair, which was clearly made by melting steel, was split in two.

Can you usually cut steel with a sword? Can't you?

How did Choco cut it?

"I liked Daddy first. I, I! This me!"

"Being loved by someone like that was the greatest misfortune for you. You should be grateful to me for stopping it until now."

Why is this house such a mess? Is the family I'm playing house with destined to be a mess? Was I born under such misfortune?

"Ah, um, aah, ugh."

Stop fighting, you crazy bastards!

The two of them seemed to be fighting for their lives, and they were breaking windows and terrace railings, so I was so scared that I felt like crying.

'Well, it's not like I'm scared of dying.'

It was the fear of both of my self-proclaimed guardians dying, now that I've grown attached to them. My tear glands aren't tightening because my body is young, and I felt like I was really going to cry if this continued.

"What in the world are you doing!"