Chapter 25
<25> Pendant
When I entered the Pendleton Estate holding my father's hand, I didn't know loneliness at first. My grandmother, Ms. Abigail Pendleton, welcomed her with open arms.
To Ms. Pendleton, who had been in seclusion wearing mourning clothes for years due to the loss of her daughter, Laura was like an incarnation of her daughter.
The grandmother's love poured on Laura was warm and devoted. Laura felt the love of a mother she had never experienced through her grandmother.
But not her uncle. To him, his sister's elopement was a sordid scandal that brought shame to the Pendleton family, and his niece Laura was nothing more than a byproduct of that scandal.
He was angry at his mother's unilateral decision to bring in his niece while he was away from home for a while, and he fought with his mother every day.
The uncle often chased young Laura away from the dining table, and whenever she happened to be seen in the house, he would shout with contempt as if he had seen a sewer rat.
Miss Pendleton had to quickly hide herself from her uncle's sight at that shout. She had a fit at the sound of her uncle's footsteps, and it became a daily routine to hide in the nursery to avoid being seen by her uncle. Every day was an uneasy day for her, like walking on thin ice.
Miss Pendleton still remembered. The terrifying sight of her uncle throwing an ashtray at her for dragging her feet. The unjust beatings she had to endure after being falsely accused of stealing pudding from the pantry, which Laura herself didn't even know where it was. In her childhood, the three years she spent at the Pendleton Estate were days that left her with unhealed wounds.
The grandmother tried to appease, coax, and even beg her son to protect her granddaughter. But the uncle was stubborn.
The grandmother eventually began to fight with her son like an enemy. Since her existence had caused a great fight in this family, young Laura's shoulders were weighed down with guilt as if she had a weight attached.
Ms. Pendleton, who fought endlessly with her son for three years to not give up her granddaughter, eventually gave up raising her granddaughter at the main house. On the day Laura's boarding school was decided, Laura soaked her pillow with tears all night and offered a prayer of gratitude.
Lord, thank you for letting me leave this hellish house.
But the boarding school she entered after leaving the main house was not all paradise.
Since the Pendleton family was one of the most prestigious families in England, the facts surrounding Laura's birth quickly spread within the school. There was no blatant bullying, but Miss Pendleton spent a lot of time alone without friends for the first few years.
But during her time alone, she was able to focus on her studies, and with her innate intelligence and diligence, she consistently ranked at the top of her school.
In addition, she added effort to her innate nature and always acted kindly and correctly in front of others. Gradually, her reputation improved, and the label of illegitimate child that followed her gradually changed to something else.
Kind Laura. Diligent Laura. Laura who never gets angry.
Her classmates and teachers always called her that. It was a much better word than illegitimate child Laura. Laura spent her entire teens trying not to be called illegitimate child Laura. To be diligent, kind, and not to get angry. Suppressing, suppressing, and suppressing again.
It was not an easy life, but it was better than being at the Pendleton Estate. At least here, her efforts worked.
But a school is a place where the time to leave comes. When she turned seventeen, her grandmother came to pick her up.
She was afraid that she would have to return to the Pendleton Estate, riding in a carriage decorated with the Pendleton family crest, following her grandmother. But the place her grandmother headed for was a Townhouse in London. After that, the two settled in the Townhouse and have lived here ever since.
Miss Pendleton only found out later. The fight between her uncle and grandmother did not end after she left. Rather, it was the beginning of a full-scale fight. While her granddaughter was at school, her grandmother was even filing a lawsuit to formally register her granddaughter as a Pendleton.
The grandmother wanted to give her precious granddaughter Laura the surname of her prestigious mother instead of her poor American father. Naturally, Gerald, the head of the family, opposed it, and the two reportedly fought like animals in court for years.
The grandmother fought equally with her uncle with the vast land that was her maternal family's property, the Townhouse that she had transferred the ownership from her husband, and a considerable amount of pension from the country. But she could not win against the laws of England, which were in favor of the head of the family.
In addition, the uncle had come to genuinely hate his mother after years of fighting. He was full of venom and did his best to bring his mother to her knees with expensive lawyers.
In the end, the grandmother sensed her defeat and only managed to register her granddaughter into the Pendleton family by making it a condition that if she died, all of her property would be inherited by Charles, the second son of Gerald Pendleton.
The grandmother completely broke off with her uncle because of that, and said that she did not even want to see the shadow of her son. The grandmother settled completely in London with Laura, who had officially become Miss Pendleton.
Even with her grandmother's widow's pension alone, there was no problem for the two to live with dignity in London. The grandmother formally debuted her granddaughter into society in the same year that she graduated Miss Pendleton from school.
The grandmother had high expectations when she debuted Miss Pendleton. She expected that Miss Pendleton would enjoy the social life that her daughter had not been able to properly enjoy because she had run away immediately after her social debut.
Wearing beautiful dresses, receiving numerous invitations, and hosting Tea party, Formal dinner, and Concert.
Miss Pendleton did not object to her grandmother's expectations, but she had no expectations for her social life. She couldn't think that the label that had followed her since childhood would easily fall off.
And as expected, London's aristocratic society had not forgotten the woman who had created a big scandal. And they did not fully accept Laura Pendleton, her child and the one who followed her surname, as a member of that society. The neglect and ostracism she received when she first debuted into society was unimaginable.
For the 12 years she stayed in society, she lived with a humble heart, reminding herself that she was not a proper aristocrat. That was the only way to not collapse from the coldness and humiliation.
Her eyes, standing in front of the window and looking at the pendant, sank deeply.
Now she was a spinster nearing thirty, and her mother in the pendant was a much younger lady than herself. Laura Pendleton, who had developed reason through experience and observation, was able to make the right judgment.
How wrong Dolores Pendleton, who had run away with a penniless painter at the age of seventeen, had made. She died by foolish passion.
And the price of that foolishness did not end with her death. It came back to her child as it was.
To her, the pearl pendant was now like a solid Armor to not lose herself. As long as she was wearing this necklace, she would never make a choice that reason did not allow. She was determined not to make irreversible mistakes like her parents. No matter how much her emotions raged.
She put Mr. Dalton's letter back in the drawer. And she looked at the mirror located in front of the dressing table. Laura Pendleton, an illegitimate child with American parents and a fake aristocrat.
She could not be with Ian Dalton. Age and dowry were actually secondary issues. No matter how much he loved her, he would also be the subject of scandal if he met her, who had commoner blood mixed in. And the bigger problem was when she married him and had children.
The problem of her parents would not only be a stigma for the two of them, but also for their children. When they got married or entered high society, the issue of her birth as a mother would definitely be mentioned.
Children born in a family as historic as the Dalton family would be the subject of gossip because of their mother's birth.
Her children would experience the same things she had experienced. Miss Pendleton could not let her children go through the same things she had gone through. To be exact, she could not let Mr. Dalton's children go through such things.
‘I like him. So, the more I do, the more I should give up.’
Her mind calmed down as rational judgment continued. She closed the lid of the open pendant.
Click. With that, her heart also closed.
* * *
Reverend Jenfield's funeral was held quietly at the small church in Whitefield, where he had devoted his life. Under the direction of Oliver Starr, a young assistant pastor who had assisted him in his ministry for the past three years, his relatives and parishioners dressed in black mourning clothes mourned him, who had been stubborn yet dignified.
Soon, the coffin was carried on the shoulders of six strong men and moved towards the cemetery where he would rest forever. People dressed in mourning clothes lined up like a long tail and moved to the cemetery following the coffin.
The coffin, placed in the prepared pit, was soon sealed forever by a pile of dirt. People cried, chanted prayers, and scattered. The last person, Ian Dalton, remained in front of the new grave.
He stared silently at Reverend Jenfield's tombstone. The old Reverend Jenfield who had given him his first baptism. The fact that he had not been able to keep his deathbed hurt his heart.
He stood in place, closed his eyes, and prayed for about two minutes. And after briefly kissing the tombstone with respect and mourning, he quietly left the place.
In front of the church, mourners were scattered, talking or gathering to comfort the bereaved family. Among them, a stout middle-aged man dressed in black mourning clothes saw Mr. Dalton and strode towards him with his hands in his pockets. It was Robert Fairfax, Ian Dalton's brother-in-law.
Ian took off his hat and bowed lightly when he saw him.
“You came in a hurry last night, didn't you?”
"Yes."
“Did things go well in London?”
“It's not over yet. I'll go back as soon as things are settled in the Estate.”
Robert nodded.
“Why don't you go see your sister sometime when you're done? She's been waiting for you to come back from London.”
“Please tell her that I will finish my work first and then go. Is my sister's health okay?”
“The chills have decreased a lot. But it's hard to go on a long journey. But she still has plenty of energy to interfere in your love life. How about it, did you find any nice ladies in London?”
