**Stalker Duchess Episode 9**
"It's better as it was before. Why on earth are you doing this? Have you decided to change your method of tormenting me? Because of you, I feel like I'm going crazy too. If you're going to go mad, do it alone!"
He spat out the words like vomiting and took rough breaths to catch his breath.
The Crown Prince, who didn't shed a single drop of sweat even after circling the training grounds a hundred times, now hung his head low, breathing heavily.
My shoulders hurt from his tight grip, but I couldn't say a word.
I'd tried to brazen it out as usual, but I was overwhelmed by his intensity and couldn't.
...What the hell did I do?
I racked my brain, wondering if there was some incident I didn't know about where I'd tormented him enough to make him explode like this.
...I have no idea!
The only thing that pricked at my conscience was the slightly stern advice I'd given him, but even that was a hundred, no, a thousand times better than what Duchess Serabi usually did.
But seeing the famously warm-hearted and kind Crown Prince express such anger, there must be something I'd unknowingly done wrong.
I placed my hand over his trembling one on my shoulder and opened my mouth in a quivering voice.
The moment my hand touched him, the Crown Prince flinched as if touched by a repulsive bug.
It was an unconscious reaction.
But he didn't forcibly shake off my hand.
He seemed to know this contact had no sexual intent.
"I-I'm sorry......"
"......"
I had no idea why I was apologizing, but hoping to end this situation quickly, I offered an apology first.
But even at my apology, the Crown Prince remained silent with his head bowed.
Brood by yourself!
I had no desire to intrude on his brooding, but it was starting to become unbearable.
I opened my mouth in a trembling voice.
"S-slowly...... my bones feel like they're going to break......"
At my words, he flinched in surprise and yanked his hands away from my shoulders.
The Crown Prince had been so lost in thought that he hadn't even realized he'd been gripping my shoulders the whole time.
My shoulders throbbed with pain from his grip.
Even at just fourteen, the Crown Prince's grip strength far surpassed that of an adult man.
The pain was so intense even standing still that a groan nearly escaped me, but hating to show weakness, I clenched my teeth and swallowed it down.
We faced each other in silence for a long while until the Crown Prince finally seemed resolved and spoke.
"......Do you remember?"
"......"
"The day you first killed someone."
The Crown Prince's face held no emotion as he spoke of that day.
His eyes were so cold it was hard to believe they belonged to the same person who'd just been exploding with rage.
Unable to meet those dead eyes, I bowed my head silently.
The trigger for Duchess Serabi's first murder......
Why bother saying it—it was obviously because of the Crown Prince.
The victim was the daughter of some count whose name I couldn't even remember.
Misunderstanding the relationship between the Crown Prince and her, Serabi had charged at her and pushed her into a lake.
Thanks to the duke's family's power, the evidence was destroyed, and it was ruled an accidental death, but it was a major incident that haunted the Crown Prince with guilt for life.
From that day, Duchess Serabi became aware of her feelings and began obsessing over the Crown Prince like mad.
Kidnapping, confinement, violence, drugs...... she tried every means possible. Though they all ended in failure.
The Crown Prince let out a deep sigh that seemed to encapsulate all his past sufferings and said,
"......Fine. This time, I'll hear you out. If you die because of me, you'll probably haunt me even in death."
The Crown Prince looked utterly exhausted as he said it.
He seemed like someone who'd given up on something.
"......My subordinates say you've turned over a new leaf or something. But I don't believe you. People don't change that easily."
"......"
"No matter what you do, I'll never come to like you."
Those words felt less like they were directed at me and more like a vow to himself.
"......"
I felt immensely grateful that I, not Duchess Serabi, was the one in this body right now.
Even as a third party, it sank my mood so much that if it were the real Serabi hearing this from the Crown Prince she loved, she couldn't go on living.
Unable to think of a response, I stayed silent for a long while, and the Crown Prince sighed and turned to leave.
"......I'll take my leave first."
With that, the Crown Prince left me alone in the hospital room and disappeared.
Left alone in the room after he left, I sank into thought.
In this world, there are forgivable acts and unforgivable ones.
What Duchess Serabi had done fell into the latter category.
Moreover, the Crown Prince, who was second to none in righteousness in this world, would never forgive Serabi for going mad over him and even committing murder.
If the Crown Prince ever came to like Serabi—no, me—even a little, it could only be called a miracle.
* * *
From that day on, true to his word, the Crown Prince showed up diligently at every mealtime.
It was a promise half-forced out of him, but he kept even such a minor promise faithfully.
That didn't mean our relationship improved, however.
If anything, an even colder wind blew between us than before.
Originally, Crown Prince Raven wasn't the type to harshly push away someone approaching him with goodwill.
But because of what Serabi, who tried to approach him favorably, had done, a huge contradiction had arisen within him.
He seemed to think he shouldn't look at me again because of the guilt over the people sacrificed because of him—precisely, because of Duchess Serabi.
The contents were a completely different person, but he had no way of knowing that.
I had no intention of risking being treated like a lunatic by explaining my circumstances in detail to him.
It would be easy if I just acted on my feelings, but the Crown Prince was too moral for that.
So from that day on, I stopped even pretending to approach him.
No matter that it wasn't really "me" he hated, who wouldn't be hurt by him openly rebuking me like that?
Even if I approached with purely innocent intentions without any ulterior motives, he wouldn't believe it right away, and it would only torment him more.
In truth, I was half in a state of giving up now.
Having realized how much he hated me, I was wasting time in a whatever-happens-will-happen resignation.
Thus, I lived indifferently toward the Crown Prince, as if I didn't exist.
It was a rare day off.
For some reason, after all the recent events, I felt like I needed to make this holiday count.
I slipped out early in the morning, avoiding the servants' eyes.
Normally, nobles always had two or three servants tagging along on outings, but I hated having people with me since I preferred being alone.
Instead, to hide my noble status, I pulled on a hood that covered my face before heading out.
First, I planned to go to the teahouse where I'd stamped my face on the commute path.
Then stop by a bookstore to browse, buy ingredients needed for cooking since it was work now, and head back.
Thinking that, I hummed a tune uncharacteristically and walked with light steps.
At that moment, a loud noise from somewhere made me stop and look that way.
A child had collided with a running carriage, causing the commotion.
"You damn commoner scum!"
A man who appeared to be a noble got out of the carriage and started kicking the child sprawled on the ground. His kicks were full of irritation.
From the circumstances, it seemed the child had been hit first, so why was he getting angry instead?
"......"
Anyway, tough luck having to do "noble business" from the morning. Thinking that, I tried to continue on my way.
I'm not on the side of justice. Personality-wise, I was closer to a villain.
I hadn't killed anyone like Duchess Serabi, but I wasn't the type like Crown Prince Raven who couldn't tolerate injustice.
If anything, I found getting involved in such things annoying. So as I turned to ignore it and walk away.
If only the commoner child hadn't run up to me, grabbing me and looking up with eyes pleading for a lifeline.
"P-please... help me......"
"......"
I looked down at those desperate eyes. Meanwhile, a knight guarding the carriage approached and glanced between me and the commoner child.
Even with the hood, my attire and the glimpse of silver hair wouldn't look like a commoner's.
But I didn't appear to be high nobility either. Unlike them, I had no escort knights or servants.
The knight looking at me spoke.
"Do you know this kid?"
"......Yes, he's a child I know. What happened?"
I let out a small internal sigh and, in the end, hid the commoner child behind me as I answered.
I wasn't the righteous type, but I wasn't cruel enough to ignore a plea for life.
"Please hand him over."
"Why? If it's about the accident, I watched from earlier, and it seems they hit first. Just let it go if possible."
"That won't be possible. The baron has always held a grudge against that commoner kid because his hair color matches his own and it bothers him."
"Ahh."
I let out a light exclamation as if understanding.
I see. What a ridiculous excuse.
Probably even the carriage accident was intentional.
