Chapter 49
Episode 49. Words I Wanted to Hear
2023.10.19.
Rachel looked at Blair as if she found her ridiculous and said,
“Why should I listen to you? Everyone has the right to love freely, and I don't need your permission.”
It was a completely different attitude from moments ago, when she had asked for Blair's permission.
Blair felt no anger or contempt toward her. Those were already emotions she had experienced once in the past.
Now, she simply pitied her cousin, who was so confidently spouting nonsense.
“It seems your rights take precedence over morality for you.”
“Don't act so high and mighty. Who in this banquet hall would fault anyone for that? Everyone does it behind closed doors.”
“Just because it's common doesn't make it honorable. If you're so proud of it, say it in front of those people. That you want to be Duke del Mark's mistress.”
Blair gestured toward the people in the banquet hall with her eyes.
Rachel faltered upon seeing them.
As Blair said, even if everyone lived that way, it didn't make an affair something to boast about.
Blair looked at such a Rachel impassively and added in a voice devoid of highs or lows.
“You can live your life however you want, but at least don't cross the basic line of decency.”
At Blair's calm reprimand, Rachel gasped in disbelief but could only open and close her mouth without further rebuttal.
Blair turned away, leaving Rachel behind.
Was it the alcohol? For some reason, she felt like laughing.
* * *
While speaking with other nobles and turning his gaze, Herdin's eyes met those of a count about to leave the banquet hall.
At his side was his wife, visibly pregnant at a glance.
Having met Herdin's eyes, he explained awkwardly.
“My wife is tired, so rather than disrupt the atmosphere, I thought it best to slip away quietly……”
“It's regrettable and apologetic that you can't enjoy this delightful banquet longer.”
“It's already a blessing that you attended despite your discomfort. I hope you'll join us after the birth as well.”
Herdin responded graciously to the guest who had made the effort to attend. It was a rare gentle demeanor from the man who usually exuded a chilling pressure.
His wife blushed and smiled shyly at that.
“Yes, we will. By then, I hope Your Excellency and the Duchess will have good news of your own.”
Good news.
At those words, Herdin's gaze dropped to her swollen belly. The softness that had briefly touched his eyes chilled once more. But it was only for an instant.
Unaware of it, the two bowed politely to Herdin.
“Then, see you at the Hunting Tournament, Your Excellency.”
With their farewell complete, the couple passed him.
Herdin watched the count's back as he carefully wrapped his arm around his wife's waist, as if escorting the world's most precious treasure, before turning his gaze away.
His shifted gaze naturally fell upon Blair. In her indigo dress matched to his, she stood out wherever she was in the banquet hall.
Not just in his eyes, but surely in others' as well.
Mine. My wife.
But that was only until the end of this contract.
‘Good news, indeed.’
Herdin sneered as he looked at Blair's slender waist.
She diligently took her contraceptive pills every day as if they were a lifeline, so her belly would never swell.
At least, not with his child.
……Unless it was some other bastard's.
His wandering thoughts reached that point, and his blood ran cold throughout his body. Merely imagining it.
Shaking off the unpleasant thought, he searched for Blair again, but in that brief moment, she was no longer visible, and someone else caught his eye.
Wesley Baldwin.
The one who had harassed Blair at Katrina's birthday banquet.
‘……Why is that bastard here?’
Blair had personally selected the invitations.
She probably hadn't invited him out of desire, but merely as a formality.
It wouldn't look good to invite all high-ranking noble families except the Baldwin Marquisate, and the marquisate wasn't just Wesley anyway.
The day after the unsavory rumor spread, his father, the Baldwin Marquis, had even come personally to apologize.
‘So if he had any shame, I thought he wouldn't show up.’
But the fool who couldn't break his habits had slunk in oblivious as ever.
Seeing Wesley brought back memories of the previous banquet, stirring unease. Moreover, Blair was nowhere to be seen in the hall now.
From past experience, his wife had a habit of hiding from others' eyes when the alcohol hit her.
‘So perhaps today too…….’
Like last time, was a drunk Blair caught by some scoundrel again? Was she showing that cute drunken side to him?
He would want to kill that bastard then.
Before anything like that happened, he needed to find her and keep her before his eyes to feel at ease.
Herdin left the banquet hall and began checking the balconies and empty rooms. The banquet wasn't over yet, so as host, she wouldn't have returned to the bedroom.
After discovering several pairs of lovers in trysts multiple times, Herdin finally found Blair on a secluded balcony. Fortunately, she was alone.
Tap tap.
Herdin knocked on the glass door leading to the balcony. Blair, who had been gazing at the garden, turned at the sound.
Herdin entered the balcony.
“What are you doing here?”
“Sober up from the alcohol.”
“Then what's that?”
Herdin gestured toward the wine glass in Blair's hand.
Only then did Blair realize her words and actions might seem contradictory and explained.
“This is water.”
It was indeed closer to colorless than white wine.
“Wise choice. It wouldn't do to show such a sight before the guests.”
Herdin deliberately emphasized ‘such a sight.’ Then he naturally took Blair's glass and brought it to his lips.
Where her lips had touched carried a faint wine scent. The water was sweet.
Realizing he was teasing her about her behavior at the last banquet, Blair pursed her lips in displeasure.
Lacking the shamelessness to brazenly discuss her embarrassing moments, Blair changed the subject.
“Were you looking for me?”
“Yes.”
“Who was looking for me?”
She naturally excluded him as the reason for his search.
Herdin found that grating but decided to overlook it, given it was a banquet and the situation allowed it.
“No one. I had something to say.”
Blair's upturned gaze asked what it was. He was pleased with his reflection filling her large violet eyes.
Herdin gazed into those eyes for a moment before speaking.
“You did well today.”
At the unexpected praise, Blair's eyes blinked.
She had thought she needed no one's approval for this banquet. She hadn't placed much weight on the noblewomen's and ladies' accolades.
Her own satisfaction was enough.
Yet the moment his plain but sincere praise left his lips, her heart stirred. And with it came realization.
‘I wanted to hear those words from this man.’
The sudden realization left a bittersweet taste.
It was praise she hadn't heard in the past.
In her previous life, she had been shocked upon overhearing retainers badmouthing her from this balcony.
After that, she had fled back to the banquet hall and somehow managed to wrap things up, though she barely remembered how. She had feigned nonchalance while seeing off the guests and returned to the bedroom.
And Herdin had embraced her as usual without a word.
That had seemed natural. She had merely done her duty as lady of the house, and he knew nothing of what she had heard.
Still, if on that day, at that moment. If she had heard those words from you.
‘……Then everything would have been alright.’
His words now were what the past Blair had desperately longed to hear.
The belated praise was more bittersweet than joyful.
“Thank you.”
Blair replied softly as she took back her glass from his hand. Their fingertips brushed in the process.
“No hiccups today?”
“Because I'm not drunk today.”
The glass she wet her throat with and pulled from her lips was empty. Her small crimson lips, moist with water, glistened under the moonlight.
Herdin's gaze deepened as he watched. At that moment, their eyes met. A persistent thirst ignited like flames.
Herdin cupped her cheek and pressed his lips to hers. The startled Blair gripped her glass tightly to keep from dropping it. Herdin took it from her grasp and parted his lips.
Blair stared at him blankly. His eyes, stopped at breathing distance, yearned for her.
He desired her.
His rippling desire, as if ready to devour her at any moment, frightened her, yet for some reason, she didn't want to push him away.
‘Maybe because I don't want to fight with him anymore.’
Or perhaps…….
Unable to pinpoint her emotions, Blair released the glass she held.
His hand took it as if waiting, and soon their lips overlapped again. Hot breaths intertwined deeply at a changed angle.
Unaware that a shadow watched the two of them.
