Chapter 31
#31
When Bianca asked if he could risk his life, Ricardo saw all the dead people he had ever seen flash before his eyes.
Some were struck by arrows, some were covered in blood, and some were lying in the mud, unable to close their eyes.
To Ricardo, life was as heavy as death.
It was the resentment and obsession of those who wanted to survive and return home but could not, a burden he carried all the way to his homeland.
Even after returning, he couldn't cleanly put it down, and it was weighing down his head, his shoulders, his whole body.
Knowing the weight of it, Ricardo couldn't readily say,
I would gladly give my life for you.
"We don't love each other."
Bianca said as if declaring to the hesitating Ricardo.
As if that was the right conclusion.
As if that was the truth Ricardo had to face.
"'Each other' means you as well?"
"...Yes."
Like Ricardo, she seemed to hesitate a little, but Bianca spat out the answer much faster than he did.
"My life is more precious to me. So I can't risk my life for you."
Ricardo felt a little bitter seeing Bianca speak so decisively, as if she had already thought a lot about this issue.
"Then what was it about marrying me?"
Ignoring the bitterness, Ricardo asked again.
"Until recently, you were the one urging the marriage."
"I was."
"Then what was that about? Were you just greedy for the position of Duchess?"
It was a question he would have been better off not asking.
Bianca's question shook him, but his question seemed to make Bianca colder and harder.
It was the same now.
Unlike Ricardo, who looked back and forth between her eyes, desperately hoping Bianca would say no, Bianca didn't waver at all.
She was looking straight into Ricardo's dark eyes.
"Yes."
Her red, pretty lips mercilessly gave the answer.
"I was just greedy for that position."
Bianca's cold and ruthless words slapped Ricardo's stiffened cheeks as they were.
He couldn't say anything, anything at all.
Ricardo just pursed his lips and glared at Bianca.
He didn't know why he was so angry.
That was what he had been thinking all along.
She was just a woman who was engaged due to an agreement between families.
He thought she was a woman who liked to be called the flower of society, to be flattered by people, and to reign over them.
So he assumed that was why she wanted to marry him.
Until recently, Ricardo thought so too.
"You are..."
But that was before.
Before he got to know Bianca's new sides.
Before he started to like her.
Before he wished that what Bianca was greedy for was not the position of Duchess, but the person Ricardo.
"...Excuse me. I have someone waiting for me."
Bianca swept past Ricardo, causing a cold wind.
"You're late!"
Asel shouted as soon as he saw my face in the hall.
"I'm not late?"
I said nonchalantly, not even pretending to look at the clock.
"Do you know how I feel right now? I feel like my heart is about to explode, wondering when your aide will come looking for you."
"Ah, is that him over there?"
"What?"
As I spoke, looking over his shoulder, he hurriedly turned his head to look there.
Of course, there was no one there.
Asel, who slowly turned his head back, blinked at me several times.
"Are you kidding me right now?"
"Was I not supposed to?"
"No, I like it."
Asel laughed, genuinely pleased.
"I always said you could treat me comfortably, but you always acted like you never would. What's gotten into you?"
"Just because."
What would Asel say if I said I wanted to lighten my mood because my heart was heavy?
What would he say if I said I was just saying anything to stop thinking about what happened a little while ago?
He probably wouldn't say anything. He might even say I chose the right person to joke with.
Saying that he was as light as a feather.
"Now, shall we dance, Lady?"
As I placed my hand on Asel's outstretched hand with a smile, he led me smoothly to the center of the hall.
On the way there, no one blocked our path or got in our way.
Rather, everyone stepped aside a little to allow us to go to the center comfortably.
"How is it? Is it a song you like?"
As if on cue, a new song began to play.
Asel asked, raising my lightly held hand.
"Yes, I like it."
"I see."
"Does Your Highness like it too?"
"No."
Asel shook his head slightly.
"But I think I'll like it from today."
Asel, who was gliding through the steps, leaned down slightly and whispered in my ear.
Wondering what he meant, I looked up at Asel, and he was smiling.
"Because when I hear this song, I'll remember dancing with you, Bianca."
Asel was saying such embarrassing things so casually.
"Your Highness is really..."
"Really?"
How should I put it in a roundabout way that he's acting like a playboy? I should have had a chance to say something like this.
"You seem to be good at making women's hearts flutter."
"Oh! So you were fluttered a little while ago?"
Asel pulled the hand he had placed on my waist towards him, and my body was naturally drawn closer to him.
"Not really."
Smiling at Asel, I moved slightly away from him in the next step. It was the same distance as before Asel pulled me in.
It was exactly the right distance between a man and a woman when dancing, as I had learned.
"Oh, that's too bad. It would have been nice if you were a little fluttered."
"What are you going to do by making my heart flutter?"
"Well. I think I could do a lot of things?"
Not just one or two, but many things...
Is he thinking of saying something ridiculous like calling him Daddy instead of Oppa next time?
"For example... appointing you as Crown Princess."
"Yes?"
The word that came out of Asel's mouth was so unexpected that I almost stopped in surprise.
If my feet hadn't moved automatically to Asel's lead, as I had invested a lot of time in social dancing since I was a child, I might have really stopped in the middle of the hall.
"You seem surprised now?"
"Of course. It's because you suddenly said something like that."
As I frowned slightly, Asel looked at me and laughed again.
It was a radiant smile.
Like someone without any worries or concerns.
Yes. Maybe Asel had no worries or concerns.
The pinnacle of imperial power was naturally the Emperor, and Asel was the one who would ascend to that position someday.
Maybe if I became the Crown Princess, and then the Empress, would it be the same?
Would I be able to live without worrying about being poisoned by someone, or worrying that someone would steal my man?
"Are you seriously thinking about it now?"
I snapped out of my thoughts at Asel's voice and looked up.
There was a familiar but unfamiliar face there.
Originally, whenever, Ricardo should have been there instead of Asel.
It should have been Ricardo, not Asel, holding my hand.
I had coldly told him a little while ago that we were not in love with each other, and now I was thinking of him.
"No."
Shaking my head slightly, I denied Asel's words and tried to concentrate on the dance. Not on Ricardo's face, which kept popping up in my head.
"Bianca."
"Yes, Your Highness."
"What I said earlier was serious. So you can seriously consider it too."
The voice whispering in my ear was gentle and sweet.
"If the position of Duchess is not enough for you, the position of Crown Princess will always be vacant for you."
This time, my feet really stopped for a moment. Even I couldn't help it.
Noticing my agitation, Asel smiled.
"The song is coming to an end, Bianca."
A small, sweet voice whispered in my ear again.
"But I will always wait."
"What do you mean?"
"I've already waited 10 years, so there's nothing I can't wait for anymore."
Asel finally managed to stop my feet.
As if stopping the dance was nothing, Asel also stopped in front of me.
People were still dancing around us.
Colorful and beautiful dresses fluttered past us, and couples holding hands were spinning around Asel and me.
"......"
I gave Asel a look that asked what he meant.
The sly Asel just smiled and didn't try to explain.
He didn't say it was a mischievous joke from a friend he had known since he was a child, or that it was nothing.
He was just smiling and looking at me.
"Bianca."
As Asel pulled his hand towards his body, my hand, which was placed on his hand to dance, was also pulled along.
I was just watching my hand slowly go to Asel's lips.
A kiss on the back of the hand was not meaningful. It was just a greeting, and it was also a courtesy to a noblewoman.
But Asel's actions, lowering his eyes as if facing something noble and bowing his head to kiss the back of my hand, were different.
The moment his lips touched the back of my hand, I closed my eyes.
It felt like I had seen something I shouldn't have seen, and done something I shouldn't have done.
"Bianca."
A soft voice called me. It was a voice that seemed to be soothing me, telling me that I could open my eyes now.
When I gently opened my eyes, Asel was looking at me.
"I'll be waiting."
Asel smiled like a spring breeze.
