Previously
The Grand Duke leads Sienna to the center of the ballroom for a dance, shocking the attendees who view them as an impossible pair. While Sienna struggles with her nerves and the weight of the crowd's judgment, they move with a surprising, natural harmony.
How to Say Goodbye to You Completely, Episode 29
Declan’s gaze, which had been lingering on the pale curve of her slender neck, lifted directly to her face. A pair of vivid blue eyes, brimming with utter distrust, stared straight back at him.
“You couldn’t possibly have asked me to dance because you genuinely wished to indulge in such foolishness.”
“I know not what you misunderstand, but I did ask because I wished to.”
He spoke plainly, yet disbelief was written across Sienna’s face. After watching her for a brief beat, he added quietly:
“Truly.”
Her eyes narrowed slightly, as though attempting to gauge his hidden motive.
“Let me make something clear while we are at it. I find no pleasure in drawing this sort of attention together with you, Duke. Rumors aside, in any case, I am—”
Her voice, orderly and deliberate, trailed off. Sienna parted her lips silently, then pressed them tightly shut as if swallowing the words back down. Her gaze wavered from side to side in search of the right word before dropping heavily downward.
“As you must know, Duke, this is hardly a time I can afford to be swept up in some bizarre scandal.”
The voice that followed was distinctly smaller than before.
In the momentary silence, a great deal had been omitted, but Declan understood her meaning well enough.
At a social gathering such as this, where the intended purpose was glaringly obvious, gossip was inevitable whenever an unmarried man and woman took to the floor. Moreover, she was currently in the midst of marriage talks with the king of a foreign realm.
Though formal betrothal proceedings had not yet begun, just as she said, creating needless scandal under these circumstances would offer no benefit to the Empire.
Yet separate from how thoroughly reasonable that fact was, her visible reluctance to be with him because of another man could not possibly sit well with him.
“Is a scandal born from a mere single dance truly worth your concern?”
He answered, pressing down his displeasure. At the tone, which sounded almost indifferent on the surface, Sienna’s gaze turned sharper still. Seeing the venom of inexplicable hostility pooling in her eyes, Declan let out a quiet scoff.
He dipped his head slightly, drawing his lips close to her ear to murmur.
“If you were so reluctant to keep company with me, you ought to have refused far more fiercely, Your Highness.”
“I made myself clear earlier—!”
Flaring up, Sienna faltered for an instant, her expression hardening.
“…Are you mocking me right now?”
“Hardly. How could I dare?”
At his brazen reply, Sienna scowled and crumpled the cloth of his uniform in her fist. The stiff fabric bunched miserably in her grip, but the curve tugging at his lips showed no sign of falling.
“Why is it that one who expresses her intentions so clearly cannot utter a single word against a marriage anyone can see is horrific?”
“How can you be so certain it is horrific? Even I have yet to lay eyes upon his face.”
“That the King of Parma’s mind is not sound is a fact already known to all across the continent.”
Her brow furrowed at his uncharacteristically persistent demeanor.
“Whatever it may be, it is no business of yours, so do not meddle, Grand Duke.”
Sienna stated unequivocally that she had no desire to carry this conversation any further. It was hardly a pleasant topic, nor was she curious about his thoughts.
At her firm line in the sand, what little smile remained on his face vanished. The hand resting against her waist tightened its hold.
“Surely Your Highness could make a different choice.”
He spoke in earnest, without a trace of amusement, yet Sienna merely gave a dry snort.
“A different choice. The creature you serve looked ready to take my head should I botch this marriage.”
Hearing her serene tone, Declan felt the wind leave his sails.
It was not that he failed to understand her. Within the Empire, women rarely held any significance beyond being someone’s daughter, mother, or wife. The greatest success a woman could achieve was merely becoming the wife of an accomplished man.
The higher the station, the more common it was to plunge into marriage for family profit; for the women of the Empire, marriage was practically the sole opportunity to prove their worth.
It was in that very context that Sienna had clung to him at the monastery in her past life.
Her only path to revival had been marriage to a powerful man.
So, then as now, marriage meant nothing more to her than putting her life back onto a stable track. Only the partner had changed.
Besides, in this life, had she not already returned to the capital all on her own, without his aid?
After a spell of silence, Declan spoke slowly.
“Would it be right for me to offer my congratulations?”
“Ordinarily, yes.”
Sienna replied coolly, without a shred of hesitation.
“More to the point, is this really the time for you to concern yourself with my marriage, Duke? Most of the women gathered here are far more interested in your prospects than in mine.”
Sienna cast a fleeting glance past his shoulder.
Because of the distance from the head seats, only the imperial couple was in clear view, but she did not need to look to know the state of Marianne’s temper right now.
Then as now, the greatest revenge she could deliver upon Marianne was undeniably this man.
It was obvious that this occasion was, in truth, a banquet arranged for Marianne and him.
Disguised outwardly as an affair for the military, the banquet was supposed to serve as a tender reunion between the First Princess and the war hero returning from years of battle. Even if Sienna had unintentionally ruined it all.
Of course, she had no intention of using him now out of spite toward Marianne, but there was one thing she wished to ask, taking advantage of the present circumstances.
Sienna maintained the most indifferent demeanor she could muster before speaking.
“What about you, Duke? Could it be you’ve delayed marriage all this time because there is another woman in your heart?”
At the sudden remark, Declan raised a brow slightly and looked down at her. This time, Sienna did not avert her gaze. At that, the handsome brow knitted further.
“Are you genuinely curious?”
“Naturally. It is a matter every woman gathered here would wonder about, not just me.”
“I had no idea Your Highness belonged in that category.”
At his scoffing retort, Sienna was silent for a moment. Her lips pressed into a tight line, and then she abruptly turned her gaze away.
“Whoever it may be, it seems certain she is not among the people here.”
In an utterly flat tone, Sienna excluded herself. Her detached attitude, behaving from start to finish as though it had nothing to do with her, stabbed into Declan like a dagger.
He stared at her with a face that had frozen completely cold.
“To say such a thing even while dancing with me.”
“It is only because you have no other person of interest that you are dancing so leisurely with me here, is it not?”
At the faintly sarcastic remark, Declan gave a cold smile.
“Your Highness knows very little about me, do you not?”
Sienna nearly snapped that she knew enough, but chose to keep silent instead. It struck her suddenly that she had no idea what either of them stood to gain from this pointless battle of words.
Yet her partner seemed to think otherwise. Even as Sienna held her tongue, abandoning any reply, his piercing gaze did not waver.
“I am not the sort who has the stomach to press my body against someone who holds no interest for me.”
At the words ground out in a low voice, a ripple disturbed Sienna’s expression. In having breached her composure even slightly, he felt a base flicker of gratification.
“If I were to say the one I desire is Your Highness… would that suffice as an answer to your question?”
At words that bordered on mockery, a stark fracture spread across her face. Yet before Declan could properly decipher the emotion seeping through it, her expression froze bone-chillingly cold, as if nothing had ever happened.
Even so, the glare she leveled at him was fierce enough to plunge a blade through his chest.
Just then, the third piece of music came to an end.
While the others concluded their dance and offered courteous bows, Sienna and Declan remained pressed close together. Across the narrow space between them, the glares they traded burned with quiet fury.
Sienna was the first to move. She tore herself away from him, nearly shoving him back.
“Words like that… are too dull even to pass as a joke.”
Her voice was faint, on the verge of breaking, and as a protest offered after that silence, the words amounted to very little. Yet seeing the blood drained from her face, Declan lost all will to fight.
Soon, the fourth piece was set to begin. Those whose turn had finished had to find new partners or clear the center of the hall.
Amidst the shifting crowd, Sienna stumbled backward. Once some distance opened between them, she turned fully around and began leaving the hall with hurried steps.
Standing like stone in the center of the ballroom, Declan swallowed a curse against the sudden surge of self-disgust. Everything was a mess. And he was the one who had made it so.
As he turned away steeped in helplessness, the balcony where Sienna had been standing came into the center of his view.
Outside, the rain continued to fall.
* * *
Wading through the crowd, Sienna was engulfed in endless regret.
She never should have come here in the first place. She should have found any excuse possible never to step foot outside her quarters.
No matter how Joseph threatened her, she should have simply stayed cooped up in her room.
At the remorse swelling endlessly within her, Sienna bit her lower lip hard. Her own foolishness—yes, that was hardly anything new. But he…