Translator: Nox

Chapter 34

“We never did get to see the circus.”

Vanessa let out a small, regretful sigh and glanced at him. River Ross, who was driving the carriage, gave a shameless shrug. Even though it was mostly his fault they were late.

It was annoying, but she couldn’t bring herself to blame him entirely. If not for him, this dreamlike escape wouldn’t have happened in the first place. And honestly, this night was satisfying even without the circus—though she would die before telling River Ross that.

“If you were that disappointed, you should have said something. We could have gotten in if I’d offered a few more pounds.”

“But they said the tickets were sold out.”

“Look at the opera house in Linden. Money can conjure up a box seat out of thin air.”

“…Spending so recklessly is how people go bankrupt.”

He burst out laughing as if he’d just heard something absurd.

“You think so?”

“If I’d known a navy salary was that impressive, I would’ve volunteered for the military myself.”

“Listen to you.”

“I wish I’d been born a boy.”

It was a passing complaint, but it was at least partially sincere. If she had been, she wouldn’t have been reduced to a mere commodity for marriage. She would have been able to inherit the family estate herself.

Ingram had made leaps and bounds in progress over the last few centuries in some areas, yet in others, it clung to the old ways with exhausting stubbornness. The archaic laws from a barbaric age stating that women could not inherit titles or land were the worst of them. And Somerset was a hollow husk, with no accumulated wealth left—only the title and the land.

‘In cases like this, it’s usually resolved by bringing in a son-in-law to take the name.’

But her uncle was not the type of man to give away even a single pence for free. He’d sooner bet it all at a gambling table….

Even if there were a slim chance of bringing in a son-in-law and her uncle intended to pass it on, she would ultimately have to give birth to a boy for a proper succession to occur. Titles were always the domain of men.

“It’s melting.”

At River Ross’s words, Vanessa snapped back to reality and licked the ice cream that had begun to run down. It was something she’d bought from a vendor she spotted just before boarding the carriage; it had that cheap, artificial flavor typical of festival food.

It tasted exactly like the ice cream her father used to buy her in secret from her mother. Back then, she had shared it with River Ross, too.

It seemed the only thing that had changed since those days was River Ross’s palate. As a child, he couldn’t get enough of it, but now he’d taken a single bite and set it aside as if it didn’t suit him. Then, he looked at her with an expression as if he were watching something peculiar.

While she worked hard to finish the ice cream, the carriage steadily drew closer to Gloucester Castle. Eventually, River Ross brought the carriage to a slow halt in front of a large tree beside the wall.

“We’re here.”

He didn’t need to tell her. The moment she saw Gloucester Castle shrouded in darkness, her chest felt tight again. Her brief, sweet escape was over. It was time to face reality once more. Vanessa hesitated before speaking honestly.

“Can’t we stay out just a little longer?”

She wanted to linger in the afterglow of her transgression for as long as possible.

“It’ll be dawn soon.”

“I just have to be inside before the sun comes up. I told them I was unwell and not to disturb me.”

“Doesn’t your maid get suspicious?”

“Not yet. I’ve used the same excuse often lately, but they say it’s a common symptom for someone my age.”

“What is? Being sick?”

“Falling ill when faced with a marriage you don’t want.”

Theodore let out a dry laugh at the nonsense. It seemed she really didn’t want to go back inside.

“So. You’re going to stay here until sunrise.”

“Um, River… if you don’t mind, would you stay with me?”

“I don’t mind, but what do you plan to do until then?”

“We don’t have to do anything. Just… it’s suffocating in there.”

“…….”

“My uncle won’t be back until tomorrow afternoon anyway.”

For a request she’d struggled to voice, it wasn’t much of an ask. Nothing that had happened today had gone according to plan anyway. From the start, this escape had been half-driven by impulse.

Asking Mr. Ross for a way out, suggesting the outing to Vanessa, intentionally distracting her even though he knew the circus was about to start, and everything that followed….

There was no reason not to be more impulsive now. Even if he followed that impulse, the only consequence would be getting to bed a little later. He gave up on thinking and leaned his back against the driver’s seat. When he tilted his head back and looked at her with one eye open, Vanessa, who had been watching his reaction, leaned back with him and gave a bright smile.

The sudden closeness between them felt startlingly new.

“This is nice….”

The woman’s long hair swayed in the breeze. The rustling of the branches was refreshing.

If he closed his eyes, he could almost trick himself into believing he was in the middle of that old garden. Even now, he often pictured Vanessa standing there.

Dahlia. The sweet voice calling for the puppy, her gentle smile, and the sight of her slender back as she stood holding her ankle-length skirts. Sometimes, just looking at the woman made him feel a sense of thirst. For no particular reason at all.

“I’m sick of everything inside those walls.”

Vanessa pulled her knees to her chest and rested her cheek on them. Her eyes were distant, as if she were dreaming.

“I just want to run away somewhere, just like this….”

In that moment, a chill ran down his spine.

“I can’t stand this wretched place anymore.”

A ghost of the past overlapped with Vanessa’s pale face. The scent of perfume so thick it made him nauseous, traces of a tryst that couldn’t be fully hidden, pale hands that had forgotten to put on gloves, the long fingers that had stroked his cheek, and….

「I’ll come to see you once I’ve settled down, Theodore.」

A voice that murmured as if laughing, or perhaps crying. A gaze that darted around busily, fearing they might be caught.

「I can’t take you with me right now. I’m not sure what will happen. I’ll probably… get on a ship. Once I’ve settled and have some room to breathe, I’ll write to you immediately. I promise.」

Even that woman likely didn’t know she would never be able to return. Emotions surged in him, making him feel like he might be sick. Theodore clenched his teeth and slowly steadied his breathing.

In the end, Vanessa Siren Somerset was no different from that woman. Drunk on temporary emotions that wouldn’t last, she would abandon everyone. Not knowing it was the path to ruin, she would beg him to take her and run away.

‘To think I’ve taken on the same role as the person I once despised so much.’

Theodore let out a hollow laugh. He didn’t know what he had been chasing, or what kind of fantasy he had projected onto this woman. He was simply stunned. The sensation of something he thought he held firmly in his hand scattering like sand was horrifying. The strength left his solid shoulders in an instant.

“Let’s go in now, River.”

Vanessa stretched her long limbs and stood up as gracefully as a cat. He momentarily failed to understand what he had heard.

“…What?”

“I should get back before it’s too late. I’m dying of sleepiness.”

There was no pretense in her face as she covered her mouth and let out a long yawn. It would be a lie to say she wasn’t disappointed at all, but at the very least, she wasn’t trying to deceive him.

“You want to go in?”

He spoke impulsively, without even knowing what he was looking for. The smile that habitually hung on his lips twisted unnaturally.

“And here I thought you were going to ask me to run away with you.”

“Run away?”

Her eyes narrowed as she looked him up and down, as if she were looking at a man possessed by some absurd romanticism.

“Isn’t that how it usually goes?”

“I suppose.”

Vanessa tilted her head, finding his sudden words strange, but then she smiled as if she understood.

“I see. River Ross, you’re the one who wants to run away, aren’t you?”

“Suppose I am. What about you?”

“It would be difficult for me. I told you. Even if I leave, I have to come back eventually.”

“…….”

“Of course, it’s not like I haven’t thought about it… but I’d hate for people like Mary to get in trouble because of me. Especially for maids—if a problem like that occurs, other families rarely take them in. They wouldn’t be able to get a letter of recommendation.”

“…….”

“My uncle knows a lot of people. If I run away, my friends will be the first ones under surveillance, and the Metropolitan Police will distribute special wanted posters. My face would be plastered all over Ingram, and anyone who helped me would be dragged away. I wouldn’t even be able to get basic necessities while on the run. The ships would be blocked. Naturally, the roads would be blocked too….”

For someone who said she wouldn’t run away, the future she described was remarkably detailed. It was as if she had already pictured the situation in her head many times over.