Chapter 27
27
Even When Roses Bloom in a Season Without You
By the time Mathias emerged from his bath, night had deepened. With his robe loosely tied, he leaned against the window he had left open toward the garden.
Compared to the vast Herhardt estate of Arbis, renowned for its beautiful gardens and forests, the garden at the Ratz mansion was modest. Situated in the heart of the city, it lacked expansive grounds, and neither the previous Herhardt dukes nor Mathias had any interest in landscaping.
For that reason, the Ratz mansion’s garden was maintained only to the bare minimum. But when the season came for the various rose varieties transplanted from Arbis to bloom in full, even this meager garden became quite worth looking at.
When the breeze began to carry the scent of roses, Mathias would think of the summer he would spend returning to the estate. As the thought of Leila suddenly surfaced— that little girl who had gone back and forth through the garden helping with the gardener’s chores—he unconsciously furrowed his brow.
She had smelled like roses. Just like the roses prized by the gardener, who had a heaven-sent talent for growing them. Then again, the gardener raising something unlucky in the forest seemed to be his misfortune as well. Leila, that insignificant nothing—what did a name like that matter anyway.
Mathias closed the window and turned away. A water droplet from the ends of his wet hair fell at his feet.
It was better this way. The doctor’s son was a match beyond what Leila Llewellyn could ever dream of. If Kyle Etman’s foolish pure affection allowed her to become Mrs. Etman and attend the university in the capital, it would be the greatest stroke of luck and blessing in Leila Llewellyn’s life.
“……Leila.”
He whispered the name softly. If that beautiful misfortune vanished from before his eyes, it would be to his benefit as well. He might even need to applaud the marriage more heartily than anyone.
But even with the window closed and the breeze stopped, the rose scent still lingered at the tip of his nose. Mathias belatedly noticed the rose vase on the console table. It seemed someone had picked roses from the garden and placed them in his bedroom.
Mathias’s gaze passed over the vase and lingered briefly on the golden birdcage before returning to the vase.
“Leila.”
Pronouncing it more clearly made the name all the sweeter.
Even when roses bloom in a season without you.
Imagining that world, Mathias seized a lush rose bloom from the vase in his fist. The rose was a pale pink. Like Leila’s tear-streaked cheeks and reddened eyes. In his tightening grip, the rose was crushed.
Surely, it was a good thing.
He could agree wholeheartedly.
But.
Mathias’s gaze slowly narrowed.
Could something like a season exist where roses bloom without you? The flowers would bloom, and he would return— so how could you not be there? How?
Amid the mounting questions, Mathias recalled a memory he hadn’t even realized he possessed. That in the rose-filled summer garden, that child had always been there. As if she were a part of Arbis itself.
And thus, his.
In that moment when he tore and crushed it yet couldn’t bring himself to discard it, his bird cried out, and for the first time in his life, Mathias wanted to kill someone. He wasn’t sure if it was the doctor’s son or that woman.
Only after the night had grown profoundly deep did Mathias release the mangled petals. Then, with his rose-perfumed hand, he tore up the documents on the table. They were the papers extending his service as a guard officer by one year, due for submission next week.
“I’m for it.”
After agonizing for so long, Bill finally voiced his pent-up words with force. Leila, seated across the table, looked puzzled.
“I’m talking about that Kyle boy. Totally for it. Absolutely, without a doubt.”
“Uncleeee.”
Leila wrinkled her nose, but Bill pressed on.
“Accept him already. Marry the boy and go to university. That’s my sincere wish, Leila.”
“I can’t do that.”
“You like Kyle too, don’t you?”
“But marrying Kyle just doesn’t make sense.”
“What doesn’t make sense about it? People marry the ones they like.”
Bill’s emotions welled up anew, but Leila’s eyes remained calm.
“It would make Kyle and the Etman family look ridiculous.”
“Dr. Etman gave his permission.”
“But…….”
“Leila, forget all those other thoughts and look into your heart.”
Bill’s voice rose.
“If you like Kyle, you marry him. If not, you don’t. Everything else is irrelevant.”
Leila blinked, then took a big gulp from the beer in front of her.
The girl who had seemed destined to become a fine drinker was living up to Bill’s expectations. By now, the two of them were drinking companions, chatting amiably over their beers.
“I do like Kyle. There’s no friend in this world as comfortable, warm, and kind as him.”
Leila wiped the beer foam from her mouth and looked at Bill with eyes grown suddenly serious.
“That’s exactly why I don’t want to make a fool of him.”
“No, what’s so wrong with you! Why are you so lacking in confidence, Leila? Huh?”
“It’s not that. I like who I am right now, Uncle. No matter what people say, I think of myself as someone without shame. And I’m trying to become a good adult, just like you hope.”
When she squinted, the eyes behind her glasses took on a deeper hue.
“But Uncle, I’m not sure about marriage. Maybe it’s something I have to do that could make a mockery of all my efforts.”
“Hah. I hope you’re not saying you’ll hole up in this cottage forever with this old bachelor, Leila.”
“I want to. I don’t want to leave Arbis’s forests or you, Uncle.”
“What a horrible thing to say.”
“I’ve even gotten my teaching certificate now, so I’m going to find a position at a school near Arbis. And I want to keep living like this. Here, with you. Now I can be of help to you too.”
“Where’s the forest going? This forest will always be here. And so will I. When I get even older and lose my strength to keep up the gardening, I might have to leave—but Bill Leamer’s still hale and hearty. Ten years’ll be a breeze.”
This time, Bill gulped down his beer.
“Even if you leave for university or get married, wherever you go and whatever you do, Leila—you’ll always be Bill Leamer’s little Leila.”
Bill reached across the table and gently clasped Leila’s small hand.
With the university entrance exam right around the corner, Leila showed no sign of changing her mind. Frustrated after days of worry, he had arranged this meeting.
“If you marry into the Etman house, you’ll be living right next door. What could be better?”
“Uncle.”
“And Leila, there are rare men like that in the world. Men who give you the certainty they’ll be good husbands and fathers. Kyle’s exactly that kind of man.”
Stroking the back of her hand, Bill smiled.
“Think about it. Marrying that good boy and building a real family. Have kids until the whole house is bustling. Kyle will make sure you’re never lonely for the rest of your life.”
“……We already are real.”
Leila, fiddling with Bill’s fingers, lifted her head. Her eyes were red around the edges.
“We’re already family, Uncle. A real family.”
“Well…….”
This tiny girl must have brought her tear ducts all the way from Robita, always making his own eyes well up.
“If you think we’re real, then you should listen to Bill Leamer all the more!”
Bill bellowed pointlessly and slid the pre-prepared envelope toward Leila with a flick. She took it in surprise and opened it, her eyes going wide. It was a train ticket to Ratz, along with travel money.
“The exam’s next week, so study your heart out starting tomorrow. You always do, but to pass, you’ll need to buckle down even harder. If you don’t go to Ratz, it means you think I’m fake.”
“Uncle!”
“If you don’t take the entrance exam, I won’t see you again, Leila.”
Releasing her hand, Bill straightened his shoulders and looked down at her imperiously. It was meant to seem stern, but his eyes were so endlessly warm that it posed no threat at all.
Leila clutched the envelope, lost in thought. Bill gazed at her deeply, etching the image of the clever, lovable girl—unchanged from her childhood—into his heart.
At last, having finished deliberating, Leila—still serious-faced—raised her glass high and extended it toward Bill. Just like back in those days when she had imitated an adult.
Bill gladly clinked his glass against the one she offered. It was real beer now, and Leila downed it in one go. Her face would turn beet red soon enough, but for now, she held her composure, playing the part of a drinker.
“Even if I fail, we’re still real, right?”
At that watery question, Bill nearly teared up pathetically again.
“We’ll think about that one.”
Gruff in tone, but Bill’s smile was warm. Leila, who had been watching him quietly, smiled too. As if they were real.
“You’ll definitely love it the most there. The Natural History Museum.”
Kyle said it with utter conviction once more.
“It’ll be like heaven for you, right?”
As he listed off the must-sees in the capital Ratz, he got most excited when it came time to talk about the Natural History Museum. Outside the rattling train window, the spring landscape bloomed with flowers.
It was Leila’s first time in Ratz, but Kyle knew it well from frequent visits to relatives in the capital. He had offered for her to stay at their house, but Leila had decided on a small hotel nearby.
“You’ll be tired today, so how about tomorrow?”
“I have to study for the exam.”
“With the exam right around the corner, what difference does last-minute cramming make? You study ahead of time.”
“Wow. You seem awfully confident, Mr. Etman.”
“Of course, Miss Llewellyn.”
“Impressive.”
“So let’s get married.”
Right. He’d wondered why she hadn’t said it today.
Instead of her usual casual refusal, Leila gazed thoughtfully at Kyle’s face. Surprised by the changed reaction, Kyle flinched.
“W-Why are you looking at me like that?”
“Hey, Kyle. Can you imagine it?”
“Imagine what?”
“Us becoming each other’s husband and wife.”
Leila’s expression turned grave, and Kyle’s cheeks flushed bright red.
“I can! I totally can! Anytime!”
“I can’t picture it well. It feels kind of weird. Us getting married, having kids, becoming that close.”
“What are you talking about? It’s not weird at all.”
“Really? Us doing the reproductive act to make a baby, giving birth, raising it—all that?”
“Rep… repro, what?”
Kyle doubted his own ears. He felt like he’d misheard something major, but Leila, who had dropped the bomb, wore an utterly innocent face.
“The reproductive act.”
She lobbed another bomb, not so much as twitching an eyebrow.
“It’s not something to be ashamed of, Kyle. It’s what all living creatures do to preserve their species. Birds do it. Flowers do it.”
“Do you even realize what you’re saying right now?”
“Yeah. I’m just a bit weak in geometry, but I’m pretty good at other subjects.”
Kyle was utterly choked by Leila’s proud smile.
“Doing something like that with us feels a little weird to me, and also…….”
“Uh…… Leila, h-here, eat this.”
Kyle shoved a piece of sandwich between the lips of Leila, who kept chattering on. It wasn’t even peak summer heat, but the train car felt like an oven.
Leila, caught off guard with the sandwich in her mouth, chewed it up and swallowed, then opened her mouth to speak again. This time, Kyle stuffed a cookie in.
“Eat this too.”
Please, no more of that talk. Please.
Swallowing the words he wanted to say, Kyle just shook his head.
When your mind’s all jumbled, think of my shovel handle.
That morning, when he’d gone to pick up Leila from the cottage, Uncle Bill had greeted him with those words. On a face wearing a smile that was kindly yet profoundly chilling.
Right. The shovel handle.
Kyle pictured Uncle Bill’s massive, dirt-caked shovel—looking more like a murder weapon.
“So, Kyle, what I mean is…….”
Leila, having polished off even the cookie, parted her lips again. Her lips, dusted with cookie crumbs, were a beautifully vivid red.
“Just try saying one more word.”
Kyle, clutching his head, muttered in a sighing tone.
“Huh?”
“If you say one more word…….”
Swallowing his true feelings, barricaded by the shovel, Kyle made a resolute declaration.
“I’ll jump off the train.”
