Chapter 21
21
The Time to Become an Adult
“I’m not sure if I should leave you behind.”
Bill sighed, his face full of worry.
“Uncle, if you keep this up, you’re really going to miss the train.”
Leila chided him affectionately, urging him on. She tried to act composed, feeling a mix of reassurance and reluctance.
The day before, in the afternoon, a death notice had arrived at the cottage. It was news of Bill’s brother passing away. They weren’t particularly close as brothers, and they hadn’t been in touch for years, but he was still the only blood relative left in the world, so Bill couldn’t just ignore it.
In the end, Bill took a few days off to return to his hometown. It should have been straightforward, but leaving this young girl alone made his heart feel as heavy as a lump of iron.
“Make sure to lock up properly. Even if it’s hot, keep the windows shut tight.”
Bill repeated the warnings he’d given her several times since the night before.
“The hunting rifle is hanging in my room…”
“I’ll lock the doors and windows tight, put the hunting rifle from your room next to my bed, Uncle. If any bad person shows up, bang—I’ll shoot them.”
Leila recited the words calmly, having memorized them from all the repetition.
“I’ll eat well, sleep well, and take good care of myself.”
It would only be a few days at most, but Bill worried about her as if he were leaving for months.
His eyes still showed he wasn’t at ease, but Bill finally tore himself away. Leila followed him out to see him off at the mansion’s entrance.
“Leila, did something happen at that party the other day, by any chance?”
Bill glanced cautiously at the grand mansion and asked.
“No. It was fun, nothing happened at all. Really.”
“That’s a relief, then… But it seems like you’ve been keeping your distance from that Kyle boy ever since the party.”
“Me, from Kyle?”
Leila laughed as if it were absurd.
“No way. We’ve just both been busy lately, that’s all.”
“You can be trusted on this?”
“Yes. Why would I lie about something like that?”
“Well, true. You two aren’t the type to get awkward. Then, Leila, if you’re scared to be alone, you could call Kyle… No, forget I said that.”
Bill shook his head firmly, waving his hand.
“That boy’s the most dangerous one.”
“Uncle—.”
“If that boy comes over to play, make sure he leaves before sunset. Remember that.”
“Stop saying weird things and go already.”
Arriving at the mansion’s entrance, Leila patted Bill’s back gently and warmly.
He kept turning back, repeating his warnings, until he finally disappeared down Platanus Avenue.
Leila stayed in place until Bill was completely out of sight, waving broadly and smiling every time he looked back.
It felt like it was going to be an awfully long three days.
“Leila’s avoiding me.”
Kyle was certain now.
“It must be because of that party.”
He’d figured out the reason easily enough.
“You think so too, right, Phoebe?”
Kyle asked gravely, but Phoebe, perched on the windowsill pecking at her oats, didn’t even pretend to listen. Feeling ridiculous for talking nonsense to a pigeon, Kyle let out a deep sigh.
Today, too, Phoebe had brought a note from Leila with disappointing news. Uncle Bill was heading to his hometown for a few days, and Leila would be at the library all day, so the house would be empty.
This had been going on for several days now. Notes saying she was going to a friend’s house, had plans in town, or was busy at the orchard. At first, he’d thought it was consideration for him, since he’d shown up unannounced and wasted trips before. But now, it clearly looked like excuses. Clumsy excuses to avoid Kyle Etman.
“Can’t blame her. I’d do the same.”
Kyle clutched his hair as if to tear it out and sighed deeply.
He’d boasted that he was her partner today, that he’d protect her, and then left her alone. Only after hearing Leila’s message through the Herhardt servant—that she was heading back first—did he rush out in a panic, but she had already left the mansion by then.
Why hadn’t he bolted from there sooner? He’d told her to wait. He’d said it first. They’d made a promise.
As Kyle paced restlessly by the window, the well-fed Phoebe took off. Kyle stared blankly in the direction the pigeon had flown, then impulsively left the room.
He barely remembered getting on his bicycle and pedaling. He thought of Leila, his breath rising to his chin, and thought of her again. Just as his chest felt like it might burst from the thoughts, Kyle arrived at the cottage in the Arbis estate. The blazing midday sun beat down on his heaving shoulders as he gasped for breath.
White sheets and pillowcases dripping water hung on the clothesline in the yard. And beyond them, the shadow of a woman with a slender, soft silhouette flickered.
Feeling a mix of deflation and relief, Kyle slowly swept his sweat-dampened hair back from his forehead. Only then did Leila seem to notice him, peeking out from behind the sheets. Her light green eyes widened round upon spotting him.
“…Kyle.”
The voice that slipped from her lips, after they trembled a few times, was sweet enough to make him forget this awkward situation.
“Sorry.”
Kyle, who had been sitting silently at the table for a long while, finally spoke with a sigh. Leila, staring down at her fingertips across from him, looked up in surprise.
“I’m really sorry. I was wrong.”
“No. Don’t say that.”
Leila shook her head in a fluster.
“I’m sorry. For lying.”
“It’s because of me, isn’t it? It’s all my fault.”
“It’s not like that. I’m not mad or upset with you at all. Really, Kyle.”
“Then is there another reason? For avoiding me… something I don’t know about.”
“Listen, Kyle. You’re like family to me, a friend I really like. So… that’s why I think we need a little distance now.”
Leila tried to smile casually, tugging up the corners of her lips, but from Kyle’s expression, it didn’t seem very successful.
She truly wasn’t angry or upset with Kyle. But that night, at the dreamlike party, Leila had seen a clear line. The uncrossable line between her and Kyle, one she’d forgotten about all this time because they were friends.
She’d already known Kyle was from a fine family that didn’t quite match hers. But the gap between that vague notion and the reality laid bare before her eyes was vast.
The heir to a respected doctor’s family, someone who mingled effortlessly with high nobility. The Kyle she’d seen that day in the Herhardt ducal residence’s splendid banquet hall was a person living in the world beyond that clear line. And that Kyle Etman was no longer the boy who used to play with Leila.
Why must children grow up and become adults?
That night, as she walked the dark forest path holding her removed shoes, Leila mulled over that transparent, pure sadness. And she made a resolution. To accept the passage of time. And to accept the path that would let her protect her precious friend within that time.
“You know you’re talking nonsense right now, don’t you?”
It took Kyle a while to open his mouth. His voice was lower and calmer than usual.
“No. This is how I really feel.”
“If you like me, why do we need distance?”
“So we can stay good friends for a long, long time. Kyle, I don’t want to lose you.”
“Who said anything about losing you?”
Kyle’s eyes, filled with Leila, wavered.
“We’re not just anybody—how could we? That’s impossible, Leila.”
“Kyle.”
“I’ll never lose you. I’ll never grow distant. How could we?”
Kyle set down his glass and clenched his fist hard.
We can’t, Kyle.
Instead of saying what she wanted to, Leila offered a smile.
Because it’s time to become an adult now.
Swallowing her thorny words, she stood up briskly.
“Let’s have lunch, Kyle.”
Leila hurriedly tied on the apron she’d taken off.
“As an apology for lying, I’ll make you a—super delicious lunch.”
“Matthias, don’t you think it’s time to leave the military and focus on family affairs?”
Riet set aside the newspaper she’d been skimming and stretched out long on the sofa. Yawning and turning her head, she saw Matthias sitting in the wing chair, reading a book.
“Spending a year or two in the Imperial Guard isn’t bad.”
He replied leisurely, turning a page. Even in this sweltering summer afternoon, in his own bedroom, he was dressed in a jacket with a properly tied tie.
“Well, true. That’s the Herhardt family tradition, after all.”
Riet murmured sleepily, stretching languidly.
“Matthias von Herhardt will become the most perfect Herhardt Duke of them all.”
As she giggled, the canary that had been playing quietly in its cage spread its wings. The bird fluttered lightly and landed on the bookshelf where Matthias was reading.
Matthias gazed silently at the bird chirping as if speaking to him, a soft smile rising on his face. To Riet, who had watched him for years without so much as a twitch of his brow as he shot birds dead, it was a profoundly shocking sight.
“I hope that bird really is a female, Matthias.”
Riet shook her head with a chuckle.
“Otherwise, it’s going to be a pretty creepy picture.”
Matthias silently extended his hand toward the bird without a word. The little bird tilted its head side to side before gently rubbing its beak against his fingertip.
“You think so too, right, Claudine?”
Riet turned her gaze to Claudine, who was sitting across from Matthias, embroidering. Claudine was watching Matthias and his bird, clutching her embroidery hoop tightly. When their eyes met, a faint smile spread across her previously expressionless face.
“Birds with beautiful songs are usually males, aren’t they?”
“Ugh. Please, Claudine. Just let us believe it’s a female.”
Riet playfully shuddered.
“Thinking of it as two males putting on a show gives me chills.”
“What’s wrong with that, brother? It’s just birds.”
Claudine smiled faintly and took up her needle again.
Only after the bird had hopped around playfully on the bookshelf did Matthias turn a page. He didn’t mind at all as it tapped his hand, his shoulder, his hair, flitting about distractingly.
“Wear a yellow dress to the engagement party, Claudine. The Herhardt Duke might like you as much as that bird.”
“No.”
Claudine replied without hesitation.
“I hate yellow.”
She caught her breath and stitched another.
“It feels so tacky.”
She added a touch of laughter.
Even Riet, who had been stabbing at the heart while pretending nonchalance, had a strange smile on her lips. Dropping the bird topic there, she began chattering again about Matthias’s Imperial Guard service and the approaching engagement ceremony.
“Our little lady Claudine is about to become a lady who outshines even the Imperial Princess.”
“Such excessive praise is embarrassing, brother.”
Claudine smiled radiantly, though she furrowed her brow a little.
It was common knowledge that Berg’s Emperor coveted the Herhardt Duke as a son-in-law.
The Emperor’s love for his youngest daughter was profound. Moreover, the princess was a beautiful lady hailed as the flower of high society. Claudine, who had taken it for granted since childhood that the position of Arbis’s lady of the house was hers, felt a sense of crisis only toward the princess.
But in the end, Claudine won. Of course, it wasn’t love.
Not necessarily.
The Herhardts’ reason for not allying with the imperial family could be summed up in that one succinct word.
They were a house with a history longer than the Emperor’s, with wealth and honor to match. It wasn’t unreasonable to judge that the inconveniences of seating the princess as duchess outweighed the gains. Such arrogance was understood when placed before the Herhardt name.
Thanks to that, Claudine Brant became the lady who triumphed over the Emperor’s daughter. The Herhardt family’s reason for choosing her was clear. The only daughter of a prestigious count’s family without an heir. In other words, a bride with bloodline and dowry as fine as the princess’s, but one who didn’t need to be elevated like royalty.
But whatever the inner workings, once the engagement ceremony was held, Claudine Brant’s name would rise higher than the princess’s in this Berg. Thinking that made Claudine feel like she could love everything in the world—even that tacky little bird.
“With your engagement ceremony right around the corner, it makes my mood all strange.”
Riet stretched languidly and sat up.
Claudine, who had been watching him quietly, lowered her gaze nonchalantly and resumed her embroidery.
