Chapter 47
- The Reason I Couldn't Look
2023.06.16.
On the way home.
"Are you turning off the lights again tonight?"
Kim Tae-joon, who was holding the steering wheel, turned his head and asked.
His words contained two meanings. One was a definite notice that he would hold her when they got home, and the other was a hope that she wouldn't turn off the lights tonight. Han So-eun quickly grasped both meanings, but couldn't answer right away.
When the light turned red, he looked at her again, with a handsome smile that made it difficult to refuse.
'Excessive beauty can hurt a person's heart.' So-eun learned a new fact.
If she could speak, she wanted to tell him everything frankly. But.
"Would that be a problem?"
So-eun was greedy, just for today.
Just once more, as Han So-eun, an ordinary woman who was neither pathetic nor foolish, she wanted to be held by him.
At So-eun's polite refusal, the smile faded from his face.
The car Tae-joon was driving slid through the night and soon arrived at his house. While riding the elevator up to the 30th floor, Tae-joon held So-eun's hand the whole time, but didn't say a word. So-eun thought that her insistence on turning off the lights might have disappointed Tae-joon.
'I become timid.' Even though I think I should be strong and determined to protect myself, the more I like someone, the more I care about what they think.
'Should I tell him the truth now?'
The reason I want to turn off the lights is because of the scars on my body. Scars from donating part of my liver to Yang Hee-wook's mother.
But, if I confess this, won't he be even more disappointed? Won't his feelings cool down completely?
While she was just muttering to herself, they arrived at the 30th floor, and she was led by Tae-joon to his house. Only after entering the house did So-eun hesitate and open her lips.
"Director, actually..."
Swish.
At the same time as So-eun opened her mouth, cold metal wrapped around her neck. It was a necklace with a diamond pendant elaborately crafted in the shape of a water droplet. Tae-joon had been silent because he was thinking about how to give her this necklace.
"Actually?"
Tae-joon, who had put the necklace around her neck, lowered his head and kissed her neck, asking. So-eun stammered and couldn't continue speaking.
"Actually, what is it?"
"...I forgot. I was surprised."
Tae-joon thought So-eun was cute for being surprised by a small gift.
"I wanted to give you something better."
He wanted to give her a ring, but because he had to meet Yang Hee-wook, he had to find another jewelry store and make a different choice.
How did you end up meeting such a guy? What about that guy attracted you so much?
He's such an evil and cunning guy, so you probably didn't know his true nature and were deceived into meeting him.
"This is too pretty. It looks really expensive."
"I told you, I have a lot of money."
"......"
"I can give you one every time we meet."
Tae-joon's answer was a joke, but it was also serious. If she wanted it, there was nothing he couldn't give her. But So-eun refused immediately.
"I don't want that."
"Why?"
Because nothing is as expensive as something free.
That was the lesson she learned from her first failed relationship. So So-eun didn't want to feel burdened by receiving too much from Tae-joon. She also wanted to fix her mindset, which made her want to give back as much as she received, the more she liked someone.
While waiting for an answer, his large hand, which had been stroking her neck, gripped her slender neck as if to embrace it. He didn't wait for an answer any longer and announced the beginning of what was to come with a deep kiss.
"Ah, wait a minute, Director. The lights!"
In the brief moment when their lips parted, So-eun cried out urgently.
Tae-joon's eyes stopped at So-eun's desperate plea. He also resisted with silence, wanting to hold onto this time a little longer, but he couldn't win against her. Tae-joon reached out towards the wall and pressed the switch.
Click, and darkness came. Her figure, holding the afterglow, shone faintly. Even this would disappear soon. Wanting to keep even a little of that light in his heart, Tae-joon stared at her for a long time. He could clearly see her, he could touch her, but the fact that some sense was blocked became a deep and intense longing. It also became loneliness.
As he just looked at her without saying a word, the figure in front of him wavered.
"I like that this is exciting too, but if you keep doing this, I might end up tying you up later."
He mixed in a half-joke for her, who was shrinking from the silence.
"I'm not ready yet. Not in the light..."
"Okay."
"......"
"I understand."
With generous understanding, Tae-joon covered her like the huge darkness that had engulfed him.
Tae-joon also decided to take advantage of her choice. In the darkness where she couldn't escape, his movements took on a slightly more explicit flow.
Her voice, her scent, her wriggling movements. While absorbing all the information about her that was conveyed to him through his body, Tae-joon continued to feel thirsty. Like a Moon Jar that had been broken in two and put back together, it looked fine on the outside, but it wasn't normal. A thirst that couldn't be quenched no matter how much he poured tormented him.
The more he was anxious, the more he would have pushed her. Han So-eun, who was swept away as if by a wave but still held onto him, was lovely. How pretty would she be? How pretty would she really be? He barely managed to suppress the urge to turn on the lights, regardless of her wishes, because he wanted to check her expression.
He wanted to check when her lips parted, when she frowned, why she was tearful, whether or not there were tears in her eyes, so after an internal compromise, he brought his fingertips to her face. Following Tae-joon's hand, her face tilted. Her reaction of leaning on him like a cat who craved to be loved even more than she was already loved, gave him comfort from time to time in his anxious heart.
You like me. You want to be loved by me.
That conviction was the driving force.
Even in the pitch-black darkness, a light of climax that seemed like there could be no more happiness arose. Even a soft sigh poured out from between her small lips.
*
The next day.
So-eun woke up refreshed. She was alone in the bedroom.
She couldn't hear any noise from outside, so So-eun carefully reached out and checked the time on her phone by her head.
'5:30... I didn't sleep much. But my head is clear.'
Her body was stiff, but her head was clear. Is this the crazy recovery power of the young?
So-eun's eyes sparkled.
Even though Tae-joon had been relentlessly persistent, she was much less tired than last week. So-eun confidently got out of bed. Then she stopped.
"That can't be...?"
So-eun checked her phone again.
- 5:35 PM
Huh!
So-eun's breath froze. That's right. That can't be.
She had slept for thirteen hours, not one hour. She had never fallen asleep so late, but she had never woken up so late either.
Is Kim Tae-joon a Sleep spirit? A demon of sleep? Is he like a Wi-Fi amplifier, calling out and amplifying all the sleepiness within her when she's next to him? One memory of falling fast asleep next to him should be enough, but she had another record. It was impossible unless he was hypnotizing her to put her to sleep on purpose.
And what remained after the surprise was deep regret.
Half of her precious weekend had been cut off and disappeared, but who could she blame?
So-eun left the bedroom with a gloomy heart.
Tae-joon was in the living room.
He had ordered a meal and set it up, but So-eun didn't wake up even when it was lunchtime. Once she fell asleep, she was the type of woman who wouldn't know even if someone carried her away.
Well, she had come home close to midnight and he had put her to sleep right before dawn, so she must have been tired. His physical strength was also different from hers. Tae-joon didn't wake So-eun up and waited patiently.
To deviate from one's own standards and adopt the standards of others required more patience than he had thought.
Han So-eun woke up after 5 PM.
He had clearly heard her exclaiming "Huh!" in the bedroom, but Tae-joon was dumbfounded by her behavior of holding her breath, coming out to the living room, and tiptoeing around stealthily.
"Looking for someone?"
"Huh."
So-eun, who was crouching with her back bent like a seahorse, flinched in surprise and stepped back. She had no face to show Tae-joon.
"Why are you running away? After waking up so late."
"...When did you wake up?"
"Me? Around eleven?"
I respect you.
So-eun had nothing more to say. Tae-joon, who had confirmed that her body was slowly moving backwards even with one remark, got up from the sofa and approached her. With a stride. Tae-joon's stride reached So-eun in an instant.
"Did you sleep well?"
Tae-joon smelled clean, fresh, and fragrant. A different scent from her, who had just woken up and hadn't washed yet. So-eun regretted it intensely in her heart. She should have at least brushed her teeth before coming out.
"You must have slept well. Since you slept for thirteen hours."
When So-eun didn't answer, Tae-joon continued.
"Aren't you hungry? You should eat."
So-eun curled her lips to hide them and just nodded.
"I was thinking of going to see the sea to cool off."
"......"
"I didn't know Han So-eun was such a lazy person."
When Tae-joon teased her, So-eun slightly raised her head and glared at him.
It's all because of the evil and persistent Kim Tae-joon.
She wanted to snap back, but So-eun couldn't say anything. It was such a close distance that their breath would touch if she opened her mouth. Tae-joon didn't seem to want to let her go, so So-eun eventually lowered her head and answered in a short, ant-like voice.
"I'm sorry. But. I was a little tired."
"Now?"
"I'm okay now."
"But why aren't you looking at me?"
Tae-joon pointed out that So-eun kept avoiding his gaze.
She couldn't keep making him feel disappointed, so So-eun chose a second-best option. Ahem, ahem, she coughed as if her throat was dry, raised her hand to cover her mouth, met his eyes, and shyly made an excuse.
"No, it's just that. It's a little awkward in the light."
A smile spread across his face as he gazed at her.
"Does that mean we're not close enough yet?"
"......"
"We need to get closer."
Tae-joon's hand, which had been moving smoothly along So-eun's wrist, met her palm. Their clasped hands were tightly intertwined. Before So-eun had a chance to step back again, he lowered his head.
Peck.
So-eun's efforts to avoid mixing her breath with his were in vain.
