Chapter 35
- Do you bully people you're interested in?
2023.06.04.
So-eun quietly got out of Tae-joon's car and slipped out of the apartment complex. She aimlessly took a bus in front of the apartment and went to a familiar place, then transferred to another bus.
Tae-joon's action of pushing her back into the car, saying his aunt had come, jolted her awake.
She wasn't particularly upset. Perhaps, deep down, she had been expecting it.
It's natural for him to hide me. We don't belong together.
Even if we dated, we wouldn't be able to be confident in the end.
Since I was the first to say I liked him, he might have taken me lightly.
'Still, it's a relief I came to my senses early.'
Getting off the bus and trudging home. The world was still muggy, and reality quickly set in. The brief flutter she felt in his arms, when he held her hand, already felt like a dream.
I really need to pull myself together now.
She steeled her heart and mustered her strength to walk. It was a long way from the subway station to her house, taking over 30 minutes. Just when she thought she was home and quickened her pace, she suddenly stopped.
Tae-joon was standing in front of her house.
Another transparent film formed in So-eun's eyes as she approached. She hadn't expected it, and she was speechless.
Tae-joon, who had come as far as So-eun had walked, spoke first.
"You weren't answering your phone."
Ah. So-eun took her phone out of her bag. She had thought the battery was low, but it had already died.
"The power was off. I'm sorry."
"I don't want to hear you say you're sorry."
At Tae-joon's remark, So-eun curled her lips inward. That's right. There's no need to say sorry. But what should we say now?
Tae-joon took the lead.
"And to my aunt..."
"..."
"There's a reason."
Tae-joon briefly explained why he had hidden So-eun when his aunt came. After saying it, it sounded so irresponsible that he added an excuse.
"I don't want my aunt interfering in my affairs. It's too early."
"..."
"Wouldn't it be a headache for Chief Han if we got caught from the start?"
It wasn't the real reason, but he hoped So-eun would understand. Han So-eun was someone his aunt and grandfather should never know about. Han So-eun also shouldn't know anything.
He became anxious as So-eun silently lowered her head, seemingly lost in thought.
"Aren't you hungry? I'm hungry."
He cautiously tested the waters, glancing at her.
Since she still seemed hesitant, he added another word.
"It's Han So-eun's neighborhood, so Han So-eun should buy me dinner."
Whether it was the reaction to the disappearance of the title 'Chief' that naturally followed her name, or the reaction to the special order to buy dinner, So-eun raised her head and blinked. A blank voice came out of her slightly open mouth.
"Dinner... what would you like to eat?"
"Whatever Han So-eun likes best."
So-eun nodded as if possessed and hurriedly took the lead.
As expected, Han So-eun follows instructions so well.
Tae-joon quietly felt relieved and followed So-eun.
So-eun took Tae-joon to a snack bar near her house.
"Is this your favorite place?"
"Their gimbap is delicious here. But if you don't like it, we can go somewhere else."
The earnest Han So-eun introduced Tae-joon to her favorite restaurant without hesitation. It was already past 9 PM, and many restaurants were closed. There was no time to find another place.
"Let's eat. I'm curious too. Delicious gimbap."
So-eun took Tae-joon inside.
"Welcome. It's been a while."
"Hello."
So-eun and the restaurant owner seemed to know each other. The restaurant owner's eyebrows rose high when she saw Tae-joon's face, whom So-eun had brought. It meant that Tae-joon was a striking beauty. But she didn't ask So-eun any personal questions.
"It's nine o'clock, so I was just about to close. I still have ingredients left, so tell me what you want."
At the restaurant owner's words, So-eun confidently said to Tae-joon.
"Tell me anything you want to eat. I can buy you anything."
Tae-joon smiled at So-eun's confident cuteness.
"Then can I order everything on the menu here?"
"I'm okay with it, but wouldn't it take a while to come out? I think the owner would be tired too."
It was also funny how she took the jokes he made every time seriously.
"What kind of gimbap is delicious?"
"I like Double Gimbap, Aged Kimchi Gimbap, and Tuna Gimbap."
"What is Double Gimbap?"
"It's gimbap with twice the fillings."
"Then shall we eat Double Gimbap, Aged Kimchi Gimbap, and Tuna Gimbap?"
So-eun nodded and ordered.
The restaurant owner's hands were fast, and the food came out quickly.
Double Gimbap was as big as its name. Instead of reducing the amount of rice, a lot of fillings were added, so it wasn't quite double, but it still looked big to Tae-joon. Tae-joon was amazed that So-eun liked this big thing. He wanted to see So-eun eat it.
In fact, So-eun was regretting ordering Double Gimbap. Today, the owner was rolling the gimbap bigger than usual, so she was about to open her mouth like a hippo in front of the man she liked.
"Can you eat it? It looks really big."
"Of course."
She answered bravely, but she wasn't confident. She wondered if she should eat it with her head down or cover her mouth with one hand, and she was watching Tae-joon when Tae-joon gulped down the water in his glass and went to get more water with the glass. Taking advantage of that timing, So-eun was able to put Double Gimbap in her mouth.
As expected, Double Gimbap filled So-eun's small mouth. Of course, it also took a long time to chew.
Tae-joon, who had returned to his seat, glanced at So-eun once and picked up a few pieces of gimbap. He seemed to be watching her, so he pretended not to look and fiddled with his phone, carefully scanned the restaurant, or read the menu for no reason. It was interesting to see the Double Gimbap disappear one by one each time he turned his gaze away. In fact, it would have been more enjoyable to watch her eat, but the current fun was also new.
He barely suppressed the laughter that was about to burst out between his lips at her cute appearance and finished his meal. After So-eun paid for the meal, the two took a piece of candy each from the restaurant owner and left the restaurant.
"Thank you for the meal. Thank you."
"No, I enjoyed the meal too."
So-eun bowed politely at Tae-joon's polite greeting.
She didn't know at first, but when she thought about it after eating, it seemed like Tae-joon had been considerate of her. He seemed to have noticed that the Double Gimbap was too big and turned his gaze away. So that she could eat comfortably.
How do you develop such a sense? Does it naturally come about if you meet a lot of women? Suddenly, So-eun became curious about his past. No, what she was more curious about than the past was the present.
Come to think of it, she had never heard a definite answer from him.
Director Kim Tae-joon. I told you I liked you.
What about you? What are you feeling right now that you're standing next to me?
"Director, I have something to ask you."
"Yes."
"Don't you have a girlfriend?"
So-eun mustered her courage and asked. Tae-joon's feet stopped there.
It was night, but the weather was still hot. Sweat formed on So-eun's lightly clenched fist.
Spring had passed while she was recovering from surgery. It wasn't just a part of her body that had fallen off. It felt like her twenty-seventh spring had also been cut out of her life. She didn't think it was a pity. She just thought that one season had ended, and that her twenty-eighth spring would be warmer, comforting herself like that and waiting for the coming spring. Foolishly.
She didn't want to be such a foolish person again. She didn't want to be someone who wasted the present for the future.
Tae-joon, who had been staring for a while, opened his mouth.
"Do you think I'm the kind of trash who would do this with Han So-eun while having a girlfriend?"
"But before, you asked me. What is it like to be good to someone? You were curious about what women think you should do to be good to them."
"..."
"So I wondered if there was a woman you wanted to be good to."
"...I just said anything. I wanted to talk."
"Ah, small talk..."
Tae-joon chuckled as So-eun muttered and nodded.
"I've been interested since you gave me the Eel rice bowl lunch box."
As if he thought he had to say it accurately, Tae-joon revealed a fact that he didn't need to confess to her. So-eun's heart fluttered for a moment, but she soon became puzzled.
"But..."
"What's but again?"
"Do you bully people you're interested in?"
Shouldn't you be good to someone you're interested in? Even if you're endlessly good to them, isn't it difficult to connect with them? It was hard for So-eun, who had no memory of being completely loved by someone, to understand.
Tae-joon also looked flustered as if he had been caught off guard, and stammered.
"It's not necessarily like that..."
"..."
"...Come to think of it, it seems like that."
His answer started with a denial but ended with an admission.
There are people who bully people they are interested in. So-eun, who had stopped in that spot with Tae-joon and started walking again, flared her nostrils because she couldn't understand him.
Aren't you worried that you'll be hated if you bully them?
What is that psychology? Is it a desire to receive attention even if you give up on being loved? Did this person bully me because I didn't give them attention?
After walking a few more steps, he apologized and slipped his hand into So-eun's.
"Sorry."
So-eun, who was weak to apologies and favors, quickly accepted the apology.
"It's okay. You just have to not do it in the future."
"That's not what I mean, I mean I'm going to be sorry a lot in the future."
"Yes?"
So-eun turned her head with a question. She was already in front of her house.
Tae-joon moved his body and stood in front of So-eun's feet. Facing her head-on, he swept her hair back with his other hand.
An alley that was even darker because there were no streetlights. The lights coming down from the building windows were creating intense light and shadow on his face. Even his faint smile made her feel like her breathing was getting smaller. Tae-joon lowered his head diagonally over her lips, which had parted because she couldn't overcome the stuffiness.
With a slow movement, he pressed his lips against hers and dug into the gap inside.
