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As Your Heart Leads You Chapter 30 – A Chilled Heart

Previously

Kang Lee-jae wakes up in the middle of the night to find an Alcohol Spirit attempting to influence Roderick Firth Blairk. After successfully scaring the spirit away, she confronts and exorcises a massive, vengeful Snake Spirit that was threatening the King, with the brief and chaotic assistance of Haim's Spirit.

I Hope You'll Recognize Me Someday (Part 1)

[I pass this down to future generations.

To commemorate the centennial of Cayenne’s founding,

the fourth king, Ryan Blairk, pursued an active policy of national integration.

The royal family promoted marriages with the Mellon, Russell, and Duncan houses, who hail from the Demon Empire.

In truth, national harmony was not the goal.

Be aware that this was done to place constraints on their abilities.

—From page 89 of Letter to Subsequent Kings]

The battle of nerves between the King and the nobility was no different today.

True to form, Duke Duncan fired off his opening shot like a cannon.

“Your Majesty, please grant me another opportunity to discuss reinstating Albert Duncan to his post.”

Roderick, who had been resting his chin on his hand, wore an exasperated look.

“Duke Duncan.”
“Yes, Your Majesty.”
“Aren’t you exhausted? I feel like I can hear you talking even in my sleep now.”

When the King laughed as if making a light joke, the royalist nobles joined in with polite chuckles.

“I don’t know why you remain so fixated on this, but I too witnessed Albert Duncan’s abilities during the Hunting Competition. Granted, hunting prowess is not the sole virtue of a military commander. Still, frankly speaking, I cannot say the man tasked with overseeing the Western Border displayed adequate skill.”

When the Duke fell silent, Roderick glanced around at the assembly of nobles and asked,

“Who was the victor of this year’s hunt?”

A royalist nobleman, quick to catch the King’s intent, piped up immediately.

“It was the First Knight Commander.”
“Ah, that’s right. Commander.”
“Yes, Your Majesty.”
“What would you think about taking up that post at this time?”

Jade answered with a deadpan expression.

“I haven’t lost my mind just yet.”

Roderick shrugged at Duke Duncan.

“See?”

"…"

“Duke. The appointment authority belongs to me. If you want a significant position, do not hide behind your father’s shadow—move the hearts of the people instead. You’ve already been granted a chance, so prove your capabilities. Once Albert Duncan hones his skills in the South, I will consider it then.”

The nobles could clearly sense how much the King had changed over recent years.

Though he still wore a thoroughly irritated and abrasive expression, there was no emotional instability behind it.

Furthermore, the substance of his words was far sharper and clearer than before.

Even so, Duke Duncan was the head of the anti-royalist faction.

He stood in a position where he simply could not back down.

“Then please, allow me an audience with Her Majesty the Queen. Your Majesty may find these words displeasing, but I am the Queen’s father. To bar such an audience is far too harsh.”

In truth, the Queen had already turned down the Duke’s requests twice.

These days, even Duke Duncan’s requests to meet her were being flatly rejected.

Roderick was well aware of this, yet the Duke’s accusation struck him as rather absurd.

“Do you mean to say… that I am the one blocking you?”

The Duke did not answer, but his silence was an implicit confirmation.

His face seemed to declare: ‘There is no way my daughter would refuse to see me.’

“Why blame me just because circumstances keep you from seeing the Queen? You claim to be her father, yet do you take her for a person without a will of her own?”

What sort of father knew so little about his own daughter?

Roderick, who had maintained a blank indifference all along, knitted his brows for the first time since the council began.

Following the meeting, the King’s attendants immediately dispatched word to the Queen’s Palace.

Though his visits had no set schedule, the days when the elder Duncan caused a stir never saw an exception.

Just as everyone anticipated, when Roderick stepped into the Queen’s Palace, Lee-jae was once again busy carving something.

“What are you carving this time?”
“Something similar to what I gave Your Majesty before.”

Lee-jae intended to reinforce the protective barrier even further.

She had been rather unsettled by that Alcohol Spirit knocking persistently on the window.

Her determination to build an impenetrable fortress was rock-solid, but Roderick, entirely unaware of her true motive, merely remarked, “You certainly are consistent.”

“Thank you.”
“Hailey. Do you truly think that was a compliment?”
“Of course it is, Your Majesty. Finding someone consistent is rare these days. Besides, it’s not as if I’m doing anything bad.”

It was an absurd argument, yet oddly persuasive, drawing a quiet chuckle from Roderick.

Pulling up a chair to sit beside Lee-jae, he said, “The Duke asked me to stop preventing him from seeing you. He seems convinced I’ve been barring his way.”

“My father threw another fit like that today, did he?”
“I haven't done a thing, yet thanks to you, my days grow more troublesome by the minute.”

Lee-jae let out an amused laugh, and Roderick’s expression subtly shifted.

Putting aside her disinterest in family affairs, she clearly despised the man.

Yet when the Duke first broached the subject of an audience, he had carried himself with utter confidence, and today he had even boasted that his daughter would never refuse him.

Why was there such a massive gulf between their perspectives?

Just as Roderick frowned, lost in thought—

“Would you like me to meet him?”
“What?”
“I will do whatever Your Majesty wishes.”
“…Why?”

Shaving away a curl of wood with careless ease, Lee-jae replied,

“I told you before: use me.”

Her words were precisely what the royalists had aimed for from the start.

On their wedding day, had Jade not urged Roderick to use her as a shield to the fullest extent?

Yet hearing those very words from her own lips made Roderick’s expression harden.

When she had said it a few days ago, he had simply laughed it off.

Back when she babbled on about being a cushion, it had sounded like a joke.

Hearing it repeatedly now, however, felt unsettling.

…A cold chill crept into his heart.

Just how had Duke Duncan raised his child for her to speak like this at her age?

“Hailey. Did I not make myself clear?”

"…"

“What I mean is, have I treated you so coldly that offering yourself to be used feels natural to you?”

"…"

“I’d prefer it if you didn’t speak that way.”

Seeing that the King seemed genuinely displeased, Lee-jae quietly set down the block of wood in her hand.

As the atmosphere chilled, the surrounding attendants gradually caught on.

One by one, they began looking for a way to slip out.

It had been obvious that the King was looking out for his young wife all along.

He was not called a monster for nothing; he was a man possessing both the authority and the power to crush anyone he pleased.

Even so, the King’s attendants worried for the Queen’s safety as they filed out. After all, if the one force capable of subduing the King was broken, there would be no replacing her.

Once the room emptied, a long silence settled between them.

Lee-jae stared down with a composed, detached air, while Roderick gazed at her with a furrowed brow.

Before long, he let out a heavy sigh.

Whenever the Queen went silent, he was the one left feeling suffocated.

“Hailey.”

"…"

“Say something.”

"…"

“Don’t you know how to smooth things over when someone’s in a foul mood? I am upset right now.”

At that, Lee-jae, who had kept her head bowed, broke into soft laughter.

Dusting off the hem of her dress, she carefully brushed the wood shavings from her palms. Then, sliding her chair slightly forward, she moved closer to Roderick.

Hesitating for a brief moment, Lee-jae laid a gentle touch over his hand.

Roderick’s irritation had already begun to ebb.

After all, Lee-jae, who had always recoiled whenever he reached out, was the one initiating contact.

She did not even fully grasp his hand; she merely rested her palm over the back of his.

“Why are you acting like this, Your Majesty? Are you angry?”
“Yes.”
“Please don’t be so cross.”
“Why? Will you get angry too?”
“No. I won’t get angry, but…”

Lee-jae paused before continuing softly,

“…I will feel a little sad.”

All the tension drained from Roderick’s body. He slumped back against the chair and buried his face in one hand.

“Why must you do this to me, truly?”

He genuinely looked as though his sanity might slip away.

“If you’re still upset…”
“Stop.”
“You told me to say something…”
“Ah, I apologize for everything, so please, let’s leave it at that.”

He caught the armrest of Lee-jae’s chair and pulled it slightly closer.

Then, as his blue eyes locked onto her lips, he felt her flinch ever so faintly.

Roderick lightly cupped Lee-jae’s shoulder, pecked her lips several times like a bird pecking at grain, and finally let her small frame go.

“Did I force that on you as well?”
“…I never said that.”
“So you’re fine with it too? That has become rather important to me lately.”

He had no idea what went on in her mind or her heart.

“Yes, it’s fine.”
“Ah, which means I wasn’t good.”
“…It was nice.”

When Lee-jae answered in a quiet yet clear voice, Roderick let out a sigh.

“Hah.”
“That’s enough.”
“I apologize again for what I said earlier.”
“Why are you apologizing, Your Majesty? I thought you were upset with me.”
“Because I brought up the Duke in the first place.”

Lee-jae smiled and tilted her head.

Though she said nothing, Roderick felt strangely cross-examined.

Those innocent eyes were a total sham, weren't they?

It certainly felt that way.

“Why are you looking at me like that? If I squabble with a child like you, I’ll end up being the only petty one.”
“I am not a child.”
“Right. I simply have no desire to fight with my wife. Plenty of people want to fight me already—why must I quarrel with my own wife?”

Lee-jae burst out laughing.

“I apologize as well. I only… said that because I wanted to be of help to you. I suppose my choice of words was a bit poor.”
“Fine.”

Their first marital spat ended before it could properly begin.

In that moment, Roderick caught a glimpse of what his future held.

The instant the Queen lowered her eyes and stared at the floor, he found it impossible to stay angry.

It was as if she were bracing herself for what might follow.

Raking a hand roughly through his hair, he noticed Lee-jae smiling, and he spoke up first.

“My lady, could you kiss me once every few days?”

Lee-jae flinched.

Finding her reaction charming, the King felt like teasing her a little more.

Only at moments like this did she appear truly innocent.

“You said you don’t dislike me either. You said it was nice.”

"…"

“Could you do it once a day, then?”

"…"

“We are newlyweds, and your husband is parched for affection. Wouldn’t you care to be a little less stingy with your feelings?”

When Lee-jae cleared her throat and ended up coughing, he poured some water and handed it to her.

A mischievous grin touched his lips as he watched the Queen gulp down the water.

Even so, the chill he had felt earlier could not be wiped from Roderick’s heart.

Lee-jae claimed her choice of words had been poor, but she was a cautious person, and he knew it.

She, who lied so frequently, had been speaking absolute truth in that moment.

◆

End of chapter

Chapter 31

I Hope You Recognize Me Someday 2

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