Chapter 50
50. Returning Home
Liene closed her eyes. That moment was the most fulfilling for her as well. This vast Nauk Castle had never felt like home, even though she had lived here since she was a child. Or rather, it was a home that felt too empty. It was only after Black came that the emptiness began to fill. Like a real home. Her trembling hand gripped Black's sleeve.
“Is it… really okay?”
“It is. If that is what the Princess desires.”
“Even if I want it… I don't deserve it. I… still can't allow it. Killing Kleinfelter. That is absolutely impossible in this land…”
“I will not kill him. Not for the sake of revenge.”
“How can you say that? Your father died right before your eyes. And you had to live without your name for so long.”
“Because I want a home more than anything. So if I have to give up revenge for that, it's a simple matter for me.”
“……. No, that's not true. That’s… that can’t be possible.”
“Why not?”
Black chuckled.
“Imagine the Princess is eight years old. She has nothing, her body is injured, and she can't stop running because she feels like someone is chasing her.”
“……”
“If she's hungry and cold, if she has a fever and is shivering and seeing things. What would she need most at that moment?”
She couldn't answer. Liene had never experienced such a moment.
“I wanted a home from that moment on. More than anything else.”
“……I…….”
Liene buried her forehead in Black's chest. She wanted to see his face, but at the same time, she couldn't. In case he looked like an eight-year-old child.
“What if… I still can't believe it?”
“Well… nothing much will change.”
Black raised his hand and slowly stroked Liene's hair. He stroked it, then lowered his head and kissed her lips. He put his lips to her ear and said softly.
“The Princess promised to accept me, didn't she?”
“I might not be able to keep that promise, no matter how hard I try.”
“No. You also said you couldn't take it back. From today, I will go back to that moment. The same goes for the Princess. She will have to sleep in the same bed as me and accept the kiss I give her when she opens her eyes.”
“What if I never believe it?”
“I'll just have to wait. If nothing happens until the Princess becomes an old woman living with me, then she'll believe it.”
“……”
At those words, she couldn't hold back the tears any longer. Liene wrapped her arms around Black. Black hugged Liene tightly in response. His lips landed on the top of her head.
“Old woman… that's too far ahead.”
“Humans all grow old, though.”
“Still… I don't want you to imagine me like that already.”
“Do you know something?”
Black gently rubbed his lips against her hair.
“How happy I am every time the Princess dislikes something.”
She had said she didn't like him asking before kissing her every time. She told him not to imagine her as an old woman. Like the pouting of a very passionate and loving lover.
“……Me too.”
“I have never disliked anything.”
“I know. That's why… I'm happy.”
That you don't dislike anything about me. I told you to spare your enemy, I said I would bear the enemy's child, and even that wasn't enough, I doubted you and changed my mind every time. But you never disliked me, not even once. It's shameless, but I'm so happy because of that. Black seemed to understand the words Liene swallowed inside. If not, he wouldn't have suddenly pulled away and devoured Liene's lips so abruptly. The kiss that started with a tingling sensation was frighteningly sweet.
* * *
“I'm glad I listened to Madam.”
Liene watched Black take his hand away from the hem of the wedding dress. Because she had altered the hem, she had to embroider it meticulously underneath, and Madam Flambard had stubbornly insisted on using silver thread, which resulted in a rather large expense. But after the embroidery was finished, it was so beautiful that it was breathtaking.
“Still, I'm better at embroidery than the Princess, aren't I? Of course. You did a great job.”
“It's wonderful.”
Liene's cheeks flushed slightly as she imagined Black wearing the dress.
“Is there something good happening, Princess?”
“Huh, yes?”
Her thoughts scattered, and Liene turned to Madam with a bewildered expression.
“Something good? Why suddenly?”
“Your complexion has changed so much. It's completely different from this morning.”
“Ah…….”
She felt awkward. …Is it that obvious?
“Well… a misunderstanding was resolved.”
“Oh, Princess. Was there a misunderstanding?”
Seeing the Madam's expression change immediately, she must have mistaken the target.
“No. Not with you, Madam… with Lord Tiwakan.”
“Ah…? Ah, is that so? No, wait. Just a moment. Then the misunderstanding that was resolved is…”
“Yes.”
Liene gave a sheepish smile and slightly averted her gaze.
“Lord Tiwakan says he has no intention of revenge. I couldn't believe it, but he talked to me enough for me to understand.”
“Is that really true? No, but can you really believe such a huge thing… just from words?”
“That's why he was hiding it. Because you can't believe it with just words.”
“Oh my, so that's how it was. Then did the old man you brought into the castle say something helpful?”
“That's….”
Thinking of the old man, there were still some subtle discrepancies. The fact that he pointed out that the Arsak Family, not Kleinfelter, would bleed because of revenge. The old man said it was because of the drought, but it felt like he was glossing over it. But when she thought about it rationally, it wasn't likely that someone who was begging for a living because he was not well would know the details of what the Kleinfelter Family had done. Maybe the old man only knew that the Henton Family had been murdered and that his young son had escaped. He could have been a relative or acquaintance of the Henton Family. There were plenty of people who blamed others because they couldn't forget their terrible past.
“Yes. He remembered Lord Tiwakan's old name.”
“Goodness. So he really was from Nauk?”
“Yes.”
“Then the talk of betrothal with the Princess was…”
“That doesn't seem to have been a formal discussion after all. His family probably wasn't prestigious enough. They seem to have wanted a betrothal… hmm. Is that why he incurred Kleinfelter's resentment?”
“What? Did you say Kleinfelter?”
“It seems that Kleinfelter was the one who destroyed the Henton Family.”
“Henton…?”
“Yes. Lord Tiwakan's family. Do you happen to know them?”
“No. …It seems vaguely familiar, but I don't remember anything. Henton… I wonder if my son would know. He's been memorizing things since he was a child.”
“Ah, you said he's in the Sharkan Kingdom now, right?”
“Yes. He's studying there. He said he's going to become a scholar and do some research with royal funding. He's not even dreaming of returning to Nauk now. I think my son is planning to die as a citizen of the Sharkan Kingdom.”
“……You must miss him. Very much.”
“All sons are like that. Men don't consider the place they were born as home, but the place they find with their own feet.”
“Is that so.”
The words stirred something strange within her. To hear that she resembled the home he desired most was both painful and heartwarming. It felt like she was the destination he had wandered towards, wounded and weary, for so long. It meant so much. …Could she really be that? To that man, she had been desperately clinging to her secrets, telling lies all along.
“But Princess, I simply cannot understand.”
The conversation, which had briefly detoured to the topic of his son, returned to its original course.
“If Kleinfelter is his enemy, isn’t his motive too obvious? I’m talking about why he proposed to you. And the baby… he must know it’s Kleinfelter’s blood.”
“I know what you’re saying. I’ve thought the same thing.”
“Doesn’t he?”
“He says he doesn’t want to lose me by seeking revenge.”
“That’s…”
“I told him I couldn’t allow Kleinfelter to die. If that happened, the other nobles wouldn’t stand by. From that moment on, Nauk would be divided in half and plunged into war.”
“……Then tell him at once.”
Madam Flambard said firmly, listening to the story.
“Tell him what?”
“Tell him you’re not carrying Kleinfelter’s child.”
“Well…”
“Tell him right away, Princess. That’s the only way to be sure of his true intentions. If he’s willing to forget his grudge for your sake, he’ll simply be happy that you’re not carrying a child. Won’t he?”
It wasn’t wrong.
“Conversely, if he intended to harm the child, his true colors will be revealed.”
“……That’s right.”
But something was weighing on her heart. It meant she had been deceiving him all along… Wouldn’t he be disappointed or feel betrayed?
“And aside from everything else, it’s the right thing to do. If you were in his position, Princess, wouldn’t you be simply enduring a great grudge? If his affection for you is genuine, the other emotions he has to suppress will be even more painful. He would have to treat his enemy’s child as his own. The thought alone is horrifying.”
“That’s right too. I’m really doing something terrible to him.”
“So tell him as soon as possible.”
“……Yes. I suppose that would be best.”
Madam Flambard patted Liene’s hand with a relieved expression.
“Yes, please do. You’ll say it was a good thing you listened to me again this time. I’m sure of it.”
“I hope so.”
She was a little worried… but she had to tell him. She really had to tell him. He was doing something that no one else could do. Even if he said he was fine, it couldn’t be easy for him. Liene nodded again, as if making a resolution. Madam Flambard and Liene carefully wrapped the dress they had been altering late into the night in a clean cloth and stored it in the closet, then prepared for the night. * * *
“Princess. Why are you taking out another blanket?”
The Madam asked, puzzled, as she helped tidy the bed. It was a very awkward question.
“Well… um, we’ve decided to share a bed starting today.”
“Pardon?”
“It’s complicated to explain everything… it’s not just that kind of meaning… there are circumstances.”
It was impossible to make her understand all the promises involved. It wasn’t so much that she was embarrassed, but rather because it was a tower of emotions that Black and she had built one brick at a time. It was impossible to suddenly point to the top and ask someone who hadn’t seen it from the bottom to understand.
“Lord Tiwakan would never treat my body carelessly. You don’t have to worry about that, Madam.”
“No, that’s not what I meant.”
Madam Flambard shook her head.
“How could I nag people who are about to be married about the bed they sleep in? It’s not that, but I meant that you shouldn’t share a bed because you’re on your period, Princess.”
“Ah……”
Liene frowned at the unexpected problem.
“I forgot. My stomach doesn’t hurt because of the medicine.”
“Oh, dear.”
“What should I do?”
After thinking for a moment, Madam Flambard nodded.
“It’s a good thing, actually. You should just tell him everything today. That you’re not pregnant, but that you’re on your period.”
“Ah… I should.”
I don’t think I’m ready yet. But I shouldn’t put it off any longer… right?
