Chapter 3
03. If God Wills It
At first, I thought I had misheard.
“Ah, so the child… no, wait. What did you say you wanted?”
“The Princess of Nauk.”
Fermos raised his monocle.
“My lord, you desire a woman? And a woman you’ve never even properly seen before? What could be the reason?”
“……”
The leader of Tiwakan chose silence instead of an answer. He rarely spoke, even normally. He had no name and no roots. No one knew anything about his life before he joined the Tiwakan mercenary group, as if it had never existed. Even Fermos could only vaguely guess. The name that replaced his real one was Black. No other name would suit him.
“My lord, consider the future. What will happen when the child is born? If it knows it’s the child of the captain of the royal guard, do you think it will grow up normally? The first word it utters will be revenge. It will call its mother a traitor.”
Fermos rambled on, thinking that Black couldn’t possibly be unaware of this. That made him wonder even more what Black was thinking. He could understand wanting Nauk. He didn’t really know why they would bother taking this barren and poor land, but if Black wanted it, that was reason enough to follow. To them, Black wasn’t some bastard child of the god of war. He was simply a god. In ten years of battle, Black had saved them from the god of death. That was reason enough for him to be their only god. But now, Black seemed to want the Princess of Nauk even more than Nauk itself. That was what he couldn’t understand. Black couldn’t have fallen in love with a woman he had only just met properly today. The Princess of Nauk was an uncommon beauty, but a pretty face alone couldn’t shake a man like Black. There must be another reason.
“The child doesn’t matter.”
When Black spoke again, Fermos’s face lit up. He couldn’t dare to press his lord, but he had been about to go crazy with curiosity.
“Why is that?”
“The child born to the Princess of Nauk will be my child, no matter whose it is. I didn’t expect virginity at this point, in what is practically a forced marriage. Even if there was someone she gave her heart to, I can’t force that. Nor do I intend to.”
“……”
Fermos looked slightly flustered and rolled his eyes. His lord’s words sounded more romantic than he had expected, which made him feel strange.
“Ho, perhaps… do you want to gain not only Nauk, but also the princess’s sincerity?”
“Sincerity?”
Black furrowed one eyebrow. That was answer enough. Black hadn’t fallen in love with the Princess of Nauk. He wasn’t being particularly lenient with her, nor was he craving her affection. So, what was the reason?
“I’m just taking what I must take.”
“So, why Nauk of all places…”
“Because it was originally mine.”
“Pardon?”
Fermos was so flustered that he almost dropped his glasses.
“Nauk… was? Then that’s…”
“If the princess were to marry, it would become more complicated to take back. I’ll take it before that happens. I haven’t thought about what comes after. I’ll tell you if it’s something you need to know, so don’t ask any more questions.”
Fermos intuitively realized that Nauk was a part of Black’s past that remained a dark secret.
“I understand.”
If that was the case, then it wasn’t something he could dare to interfere with.
“I will follow your will.”
If God wills it, it must be done. * * * The morning light that pierced her eyes was violent. Liene soothed her eyes, which had been unable to sleep all night, and headed to the window.
“……Goodbye.”
As she leaned her forehead against the window frame, which had grown cold throughout the night, she felt a chill running down to her toes. Liene quietly recited a farewell to her lover. Tears welled up like mist in her deep, vivid green eyes, but they didn’t fall. I mustn’t cry. It takes too much energy. Liene spoke to herself as if comforting herself. Goodbye. I hope you meet someone in the land of death who can love only you completely. In the end, she had been cowardly. She didn’t even have the courage to call her lover her lover. Taking the captain of the Arsak Family’s royal guard as her lover was a kind of compromise and deal. She didn’t have the power to fully preserve this kingdom, and her lover’s family had that power. Their relationship was no different from being forced by her lover’s family, who wanted control of Nauk, but her lover always said that his affection was genuine. He said he would wait until Liene could believe in him. Perhaps the day would have come when that affection would have conquered her. Her lover’s death brought a bone-chilling sense of loss, like the dawn. Only then could Liene realize that one more person who would sincerely protect her had been lost. Even at this moment, she was calculating the losses his death would bring to Nauk, and how selfish and cold-hearted a lover she had been.
“……I’m using him even in death.”
Liene placed her hand on her stomach. The claim that she was pregnant was a lie. She had never allowed her lover anything beyond a kiss. Every time they kissed, her lover looked at her like a person burning with thirst. To her, that thirst repeatedly overlapped with the Kleinfelter Family’s ambition for power. If she had truly been pregnant with her lover’s child, she wouldn’t have been able to tolerate that fact herself.
“It’s okay. The child…”
There must be a way to deceive him somehow. She could say she had a miscarriage at the right time, or perhaps actually have a child. Just imagining such lies made her shudder. Protecting this small castle was too much for her. Could she really deceive that man? Her thoughts turned to that contradictory man. A ferocious presence that made people terrified just by looking at him. But also the duplicity of leaving a careful kiss on her wounded palm.
“……”
Liene suddenly took her hand away and spread her palm. A red wound remained along the shape of her fingernails. The wound looked just like the man’s lip print, and her hand trembled. She felt that she would never be able to understand that contradiction in her lifetime.
“Haa……”
With a small sigh, Liene finally turned around. It was time to start another day. A long and painful day of somehow gathering and patching up a kingdom that was crumbling little by little every day. * * *
“……So, we have secured three months’ worth of taxes. Of course, this is the result of minimizing any potential expenditures.”
Early in the morning, mashilow visited the King’s office. After the late King passed away, the office became Liene’s, but compared to then, not much had changed. Income was decreasing year after year. Nauk, which had been more prosperous than any other kingdom in the South, was now the poorest country in the South. This was due to the drought that had lasted for 20 years. Fortunately, this year there had been quite a bit of rain, so they had somehow managed to secure taxes. If it hadn’t been for Tiwakan, Liene might not have been able to eat three meals a day, at least this year.
“That’s a relief.”
Liene carefully examined the documents filled with numbers that mashilow handed her.
“It was a good thing I quickly accepted Lord Tiwakan’s proposal. If not, these numbers would have been even more terrible.”
Liene’s lightly thrown self-deprecating joke made mashilow turn serious.
“Even so, accepting the proposal was a hasty decision. At least you should have consulted with the Kleinfelter Family…”
“If Tiwakan returns the body, I will consult with them about the funeral procedures. Please convey my deepest sorrow and condolences on my behalf.”
mashilow pursed his lips as if dissatisfied.
“The royal family should also have an official mourning period. After all, the eldest son of the Kleinfelter Family has died.”
He was still unhappy that Liene had accepted Tiwakan’s proposal. If Tiwakan hadn’t presented her lover’s sword as evidence, a civil war might have broken out.
“Wouldn’t that be disrespectful to my new fiancé? First, tell them I’ll try to talk to Tiwakan about it.”
“Oh dear… if you mention etiquette to those barbarians, the Speaker of the Assembly won’t stand still.”
mashilow’s eyebrows drooped. His gesture of stroking his chin was full of displeasure. The Speaker of the Assembly was the dead lover’s uncle. The position of Speaker of the Assembly was one of the positions that the Kleinfelter Family had been guaranteed for generations. The Speaker of the Assembly was given the sacred duty of checking and assisting the royal family, but Nauk’s Speaker of the Assembly had been performing only the duty of checking for several years. Now, it might become treason instead of checking. The Speaker of the Assembly was a person who had no doubt that his nephew would become the co-ruler of Nauk through the Guardian Knights of the Arsak Family. He obviously couldn’t accept this situation where his nephew was dead and Liene was engaged to another man, and he was likely to be furious. One of the reasons why she could never accept her lover’s sincerity was this. If Liene had married him and her lover had become the co-ruler of Nauk, the Speaker of the Assembly would have used him as a shield and plundered this small kingdom from the ground up.
“Shouldn’t you be saying such things directly? Etiquette isn’t something that should only be observed towards barbarians, Princess. The Kleinfelter Family deserves to receive the etiquette they deserve.”
“I regret to say that I am too busy with state affairs and engagement preparations to personally deliver the obituary, so please tell him to understand. If that’s too unfortunate, then the Speaker of the Assembly should be faithful to his original duties, which he has long since abandoned.”
mashilow’s cheeks flushed. It wasn’t a good sign.
“Princess, we cannot neglect the Kleinfelter Family just because Lord Kleinfelter has died. There will be great consequences. They are a family that has been with Nauk’s history since the time of the late King.”
“I know that.”
Liene smiled bitterly with a tired face.
“As you know, I did my best to avoid Tiwakan’s proposal. That’s why a hundred people died. What more do you want me to do? Should I sacrifice more people to save the Kleinfelter Family’s face?”
“……I will leave now.”
As if he had nothing more to say, mashilow retreated at that point. Liene deliberately didn’t look at him as he turned away. Thump! The door to the office closed with a heavy sound.
“To have to wage such a war of nerves even for mourning.”
Liene sighed quietly. What a terrible lover I must have been…
“I should at least change my clothes.”
I should at least wear mourning clothes. To welcome the corpse of a lover I never loved. * * *
“……What did you say?”
But she couldn’t wear a black dress.
“Sir Weroz urgently ordered me to tell you that the leader of the barbarians is bringing the body himself. You must change your clothes, Princess.”
“Ah……”
The thought of facing those beastly, sharp eyes again already made her chest feel tight.
“I have no choice. Give me other clothes. Something that conveys a welcoming sentiment.”
“Yes, Princess.”
Madam Flamvard, Liene's nanny and now the Head Maid of the Nauk, sighed deeply.
“You don’t have to welcome the barbarian, Princess. Don’t try to be too nice.”
Madam Flamvard, who had chosen the most splendid of the few dresses available, had a mixture of pity and anger on her face.
“And don’t look too beautiful. They don’t deserve it.”
“It’s too late for that. I accepted the proposal, so he’s now my official fiancé. Mistreating him is the same as mistreating myself.”
“But… but isn’t that barbarian the enemy who killed your lover, Princess?”
Liene stopped her nanny, who looked as if she was about to burst into tears on her behalf.
“Madam Flamvard.”
“Yes, Princess.”
“That person is dead, and I am now betrothed. Speaking of him now is disrespectful to me and my fiancé.”
“Oh, my…”
“Please help me change quickly. It wouldn’t look good if I’m late.”
“……”
Madam Flamvard couldn’t bring herself to answer and only nodded. Her hands were as deft as usual as she helped her change, but her fingertips trembled from time to time.
“Ah, and one more thing.”
The thought came to her as Madam Flamvard began to tighten the strings of her petticoat.
“What is it, Princess?”
“This is still a secret from everyone else, but I’m carrying a child.”
